Child ethnicity - what to put?

[Whatidentity]

I am mixed race. Married to a white man and we have a child.

Having to fill in my child’s first form that has “ethnicity” on it. My child is 3/4 white, and I think ticking “white British” is appropriate but somehow makes me v sad that my identity isn’t in there too!

That’s obviously my issue and not my child’s (!).

But what would you tick? “White British” or “mixed”? My child looks very white. So ticking “mixed” feels somehow not true? But ticking “white British” makes me feel a little deleted.

Personally, it depends on who is asking the question.
My son is mixed race - I don’t find it necessary to state this unless for medical reasons though (certain conditions more prevalent in particular ethnicities).
Even then, the tick boxes don’t cover his true ethnicity (black Caribbean - consisting of African and Indian heritage, white British and Ashkenazi Jewish - which doesn’t even feature on forms despite there being many genetic conditions linked to this heritage!).

@MrsBennetsPoorNerves hmm I don't agree with the personal identity part. However I will be honest thats probably to do with how me and my siblings were raised. My dad is full black, my mum is half white and half black. Me and my siblings are all full siblings. My brother is quite dark in comparison to our other siblings. His nose is English though and his hair is a lot more looser than mine. I just see it as making things over complicated.

Like you are saying though one can identify as whatever they like indeed. Doesn't make it factual though.

I think it's very particular to you (and your children if they're old enough). At the moment we put our children down as the same race as their father as it's just easier. If we moved away from his home country maybe we'd start ticking the "mixed" box. I don't know though.

I'm the opposite im mixed race but my childrens father is black so they are 1/4 white. I put mixed not black.

I'd always of put white British as I'm 3/4 white. In midwife appointments they ask heritage and I always say my grandmother is Greek etc etc.

Always been noted as white British until one pregnancy I was booked as Southern European on my notes and I had extra blood tests done for a reason I've forgotten now, but higher rate of a certain illness in southern Europeans.

Now I think its actually important for medical reasons as pp has said, where before it didn't even register with me to put it down.

I love this. Thank you :)

Similar situation here, I'm half Chinese and DH is white. I've often wondered the same as you, OP. Not that it really matters outside of a medical context, but because my DC look white (as do I to a lot of people) it seems like it could be missing the point to say they are mixed race, regardless of how we identify.

As a person of mixed-heritage -YOU DO NOT Let the child choose (they are what they are) -teach them to cherish it

Of course you let the child choose once they are old enough to do so. As this thread shows, race is a social construct and people have their own ideas about how it relates to them. There is no right or wrong.

May I ask your heritage? I am speaking from my experience - you are speaking from yours

Eats shoots and leaves

We're in the same position - my partner is mixed race, I'm white, so the children are 3/4 white and white-passing. We put mixed race down for them and it meant that they qualified for the BCG vaccine as their grandparent is from Pakistan where there is a high rate of TB. I don't know if that helps at all!

@JollyGood777 we live in a generation where you can be referred to as anything you like, it's getting ridiculous. The kids have so much choice which leads to confusion. You wouldn't go around saying you had blue eyes if they were dark brown.

Yes it can be important . Greek is one of the at risk groups for Thalassemia, IIRC.

I think because of the Indian heritage might be worth putting down 'mixed' as in a medical setting Indians have a higher risk of diabetes and heart disease. And the nhs does sometimes invite people with Indian heritage for additional check ups or offers different guidance because of it. So it's good for doctors to have that information available to them. And then you might as well maintain consistency across all forms.

I have this - my DC dad is mixed race and I am white. I always put down mixed for my children because they are? I’ve never seen it about being what they look like ( and agree in medical
settings can be relevant)

I think there's no hard and fast rules in how far back people can go. It's very personal. Some people may think being 1/16 something is important to them, others don't care and don't bother including it.

We're exactly the same here, I put White British for them unless there is a medical relevance as some things are more common for other races and my non-British 'half' falls into one of those other races.

I am 1/2 Indian.
I am white.
I tick "mixed white and Asian" when asked for my ethnicity.
I ticked "mixed white and Asian" for my 2 sons until they were old enough to decide. One says white and the other says "mixed white and Asian"

Mine is similar but with Chinese Grandmother on one side and an Irish Grandfather on the other.

I would say White British/Asian or Indian. How do you identify yourself is probably important.

I'm White Irish and DH is Mixed Race Other because Chinese isn't an option on the forms. We went with Mixed Race Other for DC. It's at the bottom of the forms.

My mam is mixed race, my dad is white. I identify as mixed race too.

I am half Asian half white so my baby is 3/4 white and 1/4 Asian. She is mixed race. However, I think 1/4 is the limit, maybe 1/8. If you're 1/16 or more then you're not mixed race.

I get to tick 'white other' on these forms. Even though my ancestors actually came mostly from Britain (white), that was hundreds of years ago. So I don't get to call myself white British.

DC would always put white British because it is how they identify.
You could literally tick a different box every time at random if you liked, OP. It's just a statistical thing and no one can say you're wrong.

Exactly the same situation here. I used to struggle but let them choose how they wished to answer as soon as they were old enough to understand. Now they are older I think one chooses mixed race and one white and the other I think switches. Interestingly their choices reflect how they look. One definitely looks mixed race, one white and one could be either.

I always tick White/Asian for my children. Their Asian heritage is very important to us. They can choose what they like when they're older.