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Original poster

Hugely first world problem but are my expectations of a housekeeper too high?

232 replies

SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 20:48

Prefacing this that I know I’m hugely privileged to be able to afford this etc.

We recently (Feb) hired a housekeeper on a full time basis (8 hours a day Monday to Friday, £45k annual salary) to look after our new house. She’s excellent at laundry and ironing, bed making second to none, but the house is not that clean and definitely untidy. Clothes and toys and STUFF out. Not a tip but not pristine or impromptu guest ready.
Am I unreasonable in expecting dusting, cobweb cleaning, putting things away in this time? I know I could do it myself but I’m paying her (I think) a good salary so I don’t have to.
We have a biggish london house but not a mansion - 6 bedrooms over 4 floors.

Part of the problem is maybe that she’s always talking on the phone on her AirPods, which I’m sure slows her down.

She’s also consistently 15 mins late but leaves bang on time, which again isn’t a huge amount of time she’s missing but feels irritating since I’m not sure the quality of her work is fantastic. There have also been multiple occasions she’s been a lot later due to various issues (dog was sick, plumber etc) but it’s happened more often than I feel is reasonable for such things to arise.

Part of the reason we hired her is my eldest daughter has severe dust mite allergies and associated asthma and eczema so it’s key the house is as dust free as possible to avoid asthma attacks etc. but shelves/ornaments are dusty.

But am I unreasonable in expecting a totally spotless, 100% tidy house everyday for her hours?

OP posts:
Anyport · 13/07/2023 20:53

Have you given her a prioritised job description which includes time keeping. You know that she is taking the mickey.

MetaDaughter · 13/07/2023 20:53

Grin Only in England is domestic help considered to be for the ‘hugely privileged’! In most of the rest of the world paying other people to work in your house is perfectly normal.

So no, it’s not a ‘first world problem’ …

MsAdoraBelleDearheartVonLipwig · 13/07/2023 20:54

I don’t think you are, no. That’s literally her job, to keep the house nice for you. Especially as your dd is allergic. Eight hours a day is more then enough time to keep on top of one house. Sounds like she needs a bit of a review. Have you explained to her your exact requirements?

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Cleaning
Original poster
SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 20:59

Anyport · 13/07/2023 20:53

Have you given her a prioritised job description which includes time keeping. You know that she is taking the mickey.

I haven’t, but have asked her a few weeks ago to ensure she tidies more. It was better for a couple of weeks but has slipped again.
I’ve told her I’m always happy if she doesn’t know where something goes to ask, but the problem is she doesn’t really seem to ‘see mess’

OP posts:
JaukiVexnoydi · 13/07/2023 21:00

I have never been in a position to have staff at this level, but I think the issue is that no-one can do the hard physical labour of active cleaning for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, it would be too gruelling. I don't put anything like this level of effort into keeping my own house clean and tidy (and believe me it shows) but when I do tackle it I can't keep going for more than 3 hours at a time.

You are not wrong to need this level of cleaning especially given the health issues, but you would be much better off employing the housekeeper for 3 hours a day 9-12 with managerial duties to include daily audits of the general cleanliness level of each room of the house (checking for dust etc) and doing any general tidying and organising that is beyond the scope of a cleaner, and some specialist cleaning duties where a higher level of care and attention is needed (e.g. cleaning valuable and delicate items), and subordinate to the housekeeper, two cleaners working the same 3 hour shift who do the actual physical labour and can keep up a good level of strenuous effort throughout that time because it is only 3 hours, and because their line-manager is right there making sure they are keeping it going.

Clymene · 13/07/2023 21:01

MetaDaughter · 13/07/2023 20:53

Grin Only in England is domestic help considered to be for the ‘hugely privileged’! In most of the rest of the world paying other people to work in your house is perfectly normal.

So no, it’s not a ‘first world problem’ …

It's a first world problem to pay someone £45k a year to do cleaning and tidying, yes.

StarShapedWindow · 13/07/2023 21:02

I’d get someone else. If you’ve told her about your daughters allergies and asked her to keep things tidier, there’s nothing else you can do. You need someone with pride in their job and it doesn’t should like your current housekeeper has any.

LobsterCrab · 13/07/2023 21:03

8 hours a day, 5 days a week? Yes I would expect the house to be tidy!

Whadda · 13/07/2023 21:03

What does she actually do all day?

I have a cleaner who comes once a week for three hours and my house is pretty much always “visitor ready” with dusting done and cobwebs removed.

Aquamarine1029 · 13/07/2023 21:03

Your home should be close to "spotless", from a normal distance. Her job is to clean and she's there all day, nearly every day. Your house should not be untidy or dusty. I would find someone else.

Qbish · 13/07/2023 21:06

I employ similar staff professionally, for eight hours at a time, daily. She sounds hopeless. With that attitude, she will not improve.

I'm not sure how her contract works, but it's time to start the review process. Check out her rights with ACAS, then act.

Clymene · 13/07/2023 21:06

And yes I'd expect my home to immaculate if I had someone cleaning and tidying 40 hours a week

Original poster
SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 21:06

JaukiVexnoydi · 13/07/2023 21:00

I have never been in a position to have staff at this level, but I think the issue is that no-one can do the hard physical labour of active cleaning for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, it would be too gruelling. I don't put anything like this level of effort into keeping my own house clean and tidy (and believe me it shows) but when I do tackle it I can't keep going for more than 3 hours at a time.

You are not wrong to need this level of cleaning especially given the health issues, but you would be much better off employing the housekeeper for 3 hours a day 9-12 with managerial duties to include daily audits of the general cleanliness level of each room of the house (checking for dust etc) and doing any general tidying and organising that is beyond the scope of a cleaner, and some specialist cleaning duties where a higher level of care and attention is needed (e.g. cleaning valuable and delicate items), and subordinate to the housekeeper, two cleaners working the same 3 hour shift who do the actual physical labour and can keep up a good level of strenuous effort throughout that time because it is only 3 hours, and because their line-manager is right there making sure they are keeping it going.

Maybe that’s the key. She was away for a month and I had a cleaner in twice in that time and it didn’t seem to make a huge difference to the overall house (except I didn’t iron anything at all or make the beds especially nicely).

But she did sign up for this level of housework so I’d hope she’d be capable of it.

OP posts:
WibblyWobblyJane · 13/07/2023 21:07

Whadda · 13/07/2023 21:03

What does she actually do all day?

I have a cleaner who comes once a week for three hours and my house is pretty much always “visitor ready” with dusting done and cobwebs removed.

Same and it’s of similar size. They don’t do the laundry or make beds. But the house is spotless most of the time.

SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 13/07/2023 21:07

I've not been in your position but I would say that it doesn't sound like it's working out.

If you've had a word with her already and she's slipped again how would you feel about giving her a week's notice, with the expectation that she doesn't come in again?

Passmethecrisps · 13/07/2023 21:08

Good grief! She is being paid a very nice salary and it doesn’t sound like she is doing it.

for a full time housekeeper I would be expecting the place to be absolutely shining. I can’t see why it wouldn’t be. I can imagine that this sort of role probably comes with a bit of planning to work out how to ensure that the whole house gets equal care. Something like that organised mum method but on a larger scale.

I don’t think you are being unreasonable at all - what sort of experience and references did she come with?

Sycasmores · 13/07/2023 21:09

I've always found having 2 is better than 1. I'd split the job between 2 then you do need to give a specific list of tasks and give weekly feedback.

WibblyWobblyJane · 13/07/2023 21:09

Oh but should also say there are no children in the house. That would make a big difference. I just don’t see what she could be doing for 40 hours a week, if it’s not very tidy and clean.

Caterina99 · 13/07/2023 21:12

what else does her housekeeper role entail?

I’m pretty sure no house needs 8 hours actual cleaning 5 days a week. presumably 2-3 hours a day would be more than enough.

But yes for that number of hours and that pay Id expect the house to be immaculate

OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea · 13/07/2023 21:13

8 hours a day Monday to Friday? I mean on a Monday I would expect her to be tidying from the weekend but what does she do the rest of the time? Unless she's literally following you with a dustpan and brush or staying poised to grasp the mug from your hand the instant you finish your tea how can she not run out of things to do?

OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea · 13/07/2023 21:13

My house is a tip and I have more doom boxes than organised storage by the way. I would love a housekeeper to come sort it all out!

Original poster
SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 21:14

Passmethecrisps · 13/07/2023 21:08

Good grief! She is being paid a very nice salary and it doesn’t sound like she is doing it.

for a full time housekeeper I would be expecting the place to be absolutely shining. I can’t see why it wouldn’t be. I can imagine that this sort of role probably comes with a bit of planning to work out how to ensure that the whole house gets equal care. Something like that organised mum method but on a larger scale.

I don’t think you are being unreasonable at all - what sort of experience and references did she come with?

Her references were very good BUT I’m getting the impression she worked for much fancier houses where there were additional nannies who tidied kids stuff, chefs who cleaned any kitchen mess and also a cleaner. So suspect her role may have just been the laundry/bedding although I’m not certain of that.

OP posts:
Summerslimtime · 13/07/2023 21:15

She's lazy and taking the piss, and her standards are far too low. It will not work out.

Bemyclementine · 13/07/2023 21:15

What on earth is she doing all day?? The house should be spotless.

I'm astounded that a person can earn that much cleaning. Change if career I think 😆

Original poster
SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 21:16

I should add that I don’t think we leave the place a tip for her either. Obviously I’ll clean up the kitchen every evening after dinner, dishwasher is emptied in the morning.

I’m mostly working so haven’t really seen exactly how her daily schedule goes but I may try and scope it out tomorrow

OP posts: