Anyone else just hate working, no matter what the job is?

[DrSheppard]

I'm in a pretty good job right now - the people are nice enough, the pay is very good, the subject matter is relatively interesting and it's flexible (can mostly work from home). But each and every day I struggle. I've felt like this in every job I have, and I've had a fair few! I dislike the routine of work. I dislike meetings and emails and workshops. I hate going into the office especially - I hate the glaring lights, sitting at a desk all day and the feeling of being boxed in. Even in the best of jobs I've had, this feeling never goes away.

I just don't care about work, frankly. I do what I need to do and always get great performance reviews, but I have zero investment in the outcome of what I do. Every day when I log off I breathe a sigh of relief, but the thought of doing this for the next 30+ years is awful. Sometimes I think about retraining but I really don't know if that'd 'fix' it, since I'm already in a well-paid and comfortable role and I've already dabbled in a fair few types of roles. Does anyone else feel this way?

My last job I grew to hate, so much bureaucracy and focussed on Ofsted rather than the students. I had qualifications coming out of my ears to be able to do this job and it was once reasonably paid, but no pay rise for a decade meant that I had to get a second job. I now have a number of different jobs which I do for no more than three hours at a time and I love them! My self employed bit I earn more per hour than I did in my previous role - and they’re quite menial jobs tbh. My employed bit earns me the same per hour as my previous job but again is a menial role for which I need no quals and which has no stress, but is much fun!

I’ve worked in meaningful sectors like education too, but even those jobs are so full of shit now. All the JOY has been sucked out of nursing and teaching, it’s why people are striking and leaving in droves.

not me but it's my DH to a tea, he absolutely hates but he doesn't handle stress at all well

@lostinfusion

I can handle stress no problem, I actually thrive in chaos. Still hate it mind. I think sometimes acceptance is key, I’ve done the changing sectors and even studied for another degree. I’ve had high paying jobs, low paying jobs, WFH, public and private sectors. I’ve been around the block and finally came to the conclusion I hate it all. Love being at home doing nothing, loved being a SAHM. Doesn’t mean I don’t have a brain.

Yes completely agree. I have even had high profile jobs in the charity sector where people treat you like some kind of saint, I still hated it! Even jobs where I can see I am actually making a positive difference don’t really fulfil me.

I am currently working in a bit more of a boring job as I have realised it doesn’t really matter what I do, it’s doesn’t make a difference to me! I think I am not inclined that way. I always work hard and do well but if doesn’t actually do anything for me. In an ideal world I would work voluntarily a couple of days a week and then just spend the rest of my time on housework and the kids! For some reason being a volunteer would be more meaningful. I only really work because I get paid for it.

I feel the same, I hate working. I do it because I have children to feed and that’s where it ends. If I didn’t have to work again I’d be very happy and my anxiety would be gone. I struggle with other people and often end up being bullied in jobs because I’m not outgoing and chatty, so I change jobs at least once a year. I have no ambition or career choice I have ever wanted to do. It’s sad, because something we have to do should be enjoyable but I know I’ll never find something that appeals. Very few people are respected in their jobs these days, we’re all just a number in the payroll system, earning someone else money and sacrificing a lot to do so. Hopefully one day all of us here find something at least bearable until we can retire.

I don't particularly like the job I'm doing, but I hate the HAVING to get up at a certain time and go out even if the weather is shite. It's not having the choice that irks me. I don't think I could not work at all though - it would be nice to pitch up for 2-3 hours when it suited me! Having worked full time for nearly 40 years it's nice to have been part time for the last 2 which helps.

@SparklingMarkling - I wasn't suggesting at all you don't have a brain. DH definitely has a brain but would be far far happier staying at home & doing up the house & keeping things organised there.

He's also tried several jobs & is self employed so very flexible but just hates it.

Although it's great to have a nice house, fancy holiday etc, I do think if some people are able to downsize and live a more humble lifestyle it is definitely preferable to working so many hours in a job you hate. Also when you have more time you can save more money (cooking for self, fixing things, not needing to drive to work e.g. not needing a car maybe).

And to everyone who hates their job, but wants to do it for the holidays once a year - is it really worth it?

Freelancing can give you multiple times per hour vs what you might get in a job. Ok it is stressful at times, and less stable. But for the freedom you get and pursuing a career you want to do it is so worth it. Even if it takes time to build up to it.

I'd honestly rather get by on a lower income and live in a smaller house and have basic holidays than spend most of my waking hours working for someone else doing something I hate.

Not judging anyone who does a job here but just saying if you open your mind a bit and consider how you could live differently, potentially, and the hours of your life being so limited, it is definitely worth considering.

Why is working so shit for so many people, then? How have we ended up here?

Genuine question. I'm not lazy or entitled, I get on well with people, I like making a positive contribution to society. I don't expect to sit around on my arse getting something for nothing. I've worked hard and studied hard for years, been focused and ambitious, gone the extra mile etc etc. Done all the things I was supposed to do.

But work is just...awful. It's soul-destroying, monotonous rubbish, full of pointless jargon and people inventing tasks to make themselves and others look busy. Lots of work is genuinely pointless and even the 'important' stuff (health, education etc) has been turned into something that's mainly an unrewarding slog.

It feels like a big old con, frankly.

I would like to be a postlady. I would enjoy being outdoors and walking, saying hello to people on your patch.. but it's shit pay and probably has it's own stressors.

@lostinfusion

Apologies for being snappy. I was kind of angry even after my teaching experience that whilst it should have been very rewarding (and a lot of it was) it was once again ruined by total bullshit. Same in the health and social care sector. Charity sector was corrupt as hell and bizarre….. admin jobs just KILL MY SOUL. I even had a beautiful office in one job with a shiny plaque on the door with my name on it. Loathed it.

I’ve worked indoors/outdoors and everything inbetween 🤦‍♀️.

I now work from home in a flexible and well paid job whereby I can be emotionally present for my children. That’s the best it’s gonna get and it’s not badly paid. Today I’ve had off, and I’m just sitting here loving my life drinking tea and having a little gander on mumsnet.

We must be married to the same bloke… 🤣🤣
Its the constant moaning I can’t stand!

I fully agree with your last paragraph. I think most people realise just how pointless and made-up their daily tasks are - perhaps that’s what’s contributing to the productivity issue reported by the media.

Totally agree with this. I work in a fairly 'meaningful' area and yet the tasks that I do day-to-day feel so monotonous and soul-destroying that it's hard to connect it to the broader purpose of the work. There is something so off with the set-up of work fundamentally.

And yes, it's easy to idealise jobs like gardening but those jobs tend to be lowly paid and probably have their own associated stresses.

I felt exactly like this, until I became a teacher. I wouldn’t work if I didn’t have to, but I do genuinely love it!

I was ‘taught’ by my parents to hate working, as they constantly moaned about their jobs. I think it’s created a subconscious connection, that working is a ‘bad’ thing. It was genuinely shocking for me to experience enjoying going to work. I didn’t think it was possible!

I’ve vowed to only speak positively about work in front of my kids, so that they don’t develop this attitude themselves.

🙋🏽‍♀️

At a push I'd work very part-time hours, couple days a week, late start and early finish.

I currently work every day, albeit a mix of hours during the week. I live in a tiny flat and drive a car that's over a decade old. It's an exhausting existence.

🏅

I like my job, I like the people and I find it meaningful. There are occasionally big challenges I’d love to be without and fuck me do I hate getting up at the crack of dawn every day (or pitch black in the winter months). But yeah, big fan of the money and working with something I actually enjoy doing.
Honestly don’t know if I’d quit if I won the lottery! Would hate wfh or office drudge though, David Graeber had a point about bullshit jobs.

@BodegaSushi I take it you don't enjoy work then.

Yes, I dislike working. It's linked to my ASD and it gets worse as I get older; I just don't want to be surrounded by people and noise and busyness all the time, have the stress of getting tasks done in a given time frame, constant emails and computer work, meetings that feel like they could just be an email but you have to sit there... Fucking torture.

I worked out recently that I can probably afford to retire at 58, with the mortgage paid off and a private pension and dabble a bit in fun, part-time work. Just got to get through the next 15 years!!

I have a friend who virtually didn't work her while adult life, lived on benefits etc. who then met and married a millionaire and they live part of the year in the UK and part of the year in a Mediterranean country. They're both delightful people but sometimes I am jealous of her lifestyle and the fact she's never really worked yet she's set for life.

I have always struggled with a job, so I am doing what I need to do to have several jobs.

It means I will never get to the top of the tree in any one area but that's fine, I figured variety and being in charge of my own destiny makes the difference to me. So I work 6 hours a day in one technical and mostly legal role where I do solid brain work and don't speak to anyone. Then I have contracts to deliver services in a similar field but where it is much more relational and project driven in a couple of other things and where my employer is me. All of it is wfh which suits me.

I never felt safe at work when I was an employee and being powerless was what made me unhappy I think. Now I basically get paid by the hour whatever I am doing at a particular time and if one thing fell out of the window I would be fine while I replaced it. Being relaxed makes me happy and knowing what exactly I delivered for my pay instead of a middle manager with effectively a lot of invisible time makes me feel safer too.

It boils down to we work to live or we live to work and for most folk i think its work to live.

Well...the title of the thread IS 'anybody else hate working'

But good for you that you love your job and want to work forever 🤪

Make an early retirement plan, I honestly thought we'd never be able to retire but we stuck to a savings and investing plan and it was amazing seeing it grow. We didn't live frugally or miss out on holidays or anything either, just put aside a portion of our income. We set up Isa's, premium bonds direct debits, personal pensions (as well as work ones) and invested in property then eventually downsized.
I really liked my jobs but I did have to juggle to fit in some things and I hated early mornings. I love the freedom and relief of not slogging away anymore since we went part time a few years ago and even more so when we took early retirement this year in our mid 50's.