Anyone else just hate working, no matter what the job is?

[DrSheppard]

I'm in a pretty good job right now - the people are nice enough, the pay is very good, the subject matter is relatively interesting and it's flexible (can mostly work from home). But each and every day I struggle. I've felt like this in every job I have, and I've had a fair few! I dislike the routine of work. I dislike meetings and emails and workshops. I hate going into the office especially - I hate the glaring lights, sitting at a desk all day and the feeling of being boxed in. Even in the best of jobs I've had, this feeling never goes away.

I just don't care about work, frankly. I do what I need to do and always get great performance reviews, but I have zero investment in the outcome of what I do. Every day when I log off I breathe a sigh of relief, but the thought of doing this for the next 30+ years is awful. Sometimes I think about retraining but I really don't know if that'd 'fix' it, since I'm already in a well-paid and comfortable role and I've already dabbled in a fair few types of roles. Does anyone else feel this way?

I retrained via apprenticeship in my late 40s and still don’t like work. My salary improved drastically. Thankfully I achieved a well paid role in the organisation so could continue the apprenticeship but without being stuck on minimum wage. Now I’m wondering if I can find another apprenticeship for something outdoorsy because the non work boring office job is sending me slowly mad. But risking the pay cut for something generally less lucrative is difficult. But I can’t do another 15 years of this it’s like a slow death.

bussteward I feel for you. I didn't exactly follow a passion but wrote off a couple of more profitable options thinking they'd be too dull. I didn't realise it would all be the same.

I would have said my passion was creative writing and in my 30s I nearly took a year off to do an MA. I realised that I'd just be looking for an excuse to escape and wind up with a huge bill to pay. But I remember almost crying on the Tube on the way to work when I realised it was a dumb thing for me to do.

For younger people on the thread, I think it gets easier as you get older because you're closer to stopping. But it's good to be realistic and plan ahead. There's a joke in my family that I'm tighter than a gnat's arse, but that's because I see everything in terms of how much time I have to spend working in order to get it.

I "need" a proper haircut, haven't had one in years, but cheapest I can find is £28 so will just get my sis to chop off the ends again.

Sometimes, even at this late stage, I feel really sad about how work and careers turned out. I don't mean the daily irritation - I mean a deep sadness. i know my late father found me disappointing, I did so well at school.

Sorry if that's a downer. On the plus side, after my day is done I get to have a walk in the sunshine and not worry that I'm senior mgmt and someone will call me out of hours etc.

I hear you. I hate it. I go to work because I have to. I work hard, I've worked my way up the ladder but since having my baby and then suddenly losing my mum I've realised I don't actually care. I think I may have a bit of grief related depression which I need to pull myself out of but I know deep down inside if I didn't have to go to work my mood would certainly lift. In an ideal world I would like to work for about 4 hours at £100 per hour just so I'm contributing lol

That's great! As an aside, I work for myself now and I've learned to only accept jobs that I know will maintain my interest...

I help people with learning disabilities/autism lead a full life, achieving goals and going on days out. It's really fulfilling, I have a bond with the 3 people I take out. I help them navigate life, be a friend and have fun. I do groups with them but the last few weeks have included seaside trips, gigs, 40s weekend! All paid by them except if I want food/drink. I'm out in all weathers but beats being in an office (for me) Every day is full of good vibes and the feeling that I'm making a difference.

I know what you mean. I don’t derive any fulfilment from work. What’s made me happy with work is to get the highest paying (but boring and unfulfilling) job that I can, and then go part-time. So I get a pretty good wage with time to do what I want.

I do know people who derive lots of fulfilment from their jobs though. They tend to be teachers, nurses, and midwives.

I've only read a few pages but thought I'd chuck in my tuppenceworth. Fell into a depression in a relatively well paid office job I my 20s/early 30s. Hated the monotony, the politics, the routine, the shit trivial irritations, the carpet squares, the bad lighting, the awful coffee machine.

Retrained as a secondary teacher five years ago and now specialise in pastoral care, doing CPD towards a Diploma in it.

I genuinely love my job. I love my students, my colleagues and the feeling that I am achieving something worthwhile, affecting people's lives in a positive way every day. No two days are the same, ever. It's tough going, it's relentless, demanding, all-consuming, ever changing and never enough time in the day. But I am fulfilled. The support, the feedback, the appreciation and the camaraderie reminds me how lucky I am when I read threads like this. Only you can change your life.

This is me to be honest! However I actually quite like my job at the moment because it is very much a role where I am told what to do and then I go off and fulfil the task, but pretty well paid and all wfh so when there’s not much on I can go off and do something else.

My manager is the opposite and excels at defining the scope of things and setting out the strategy so I think we work well together. And she’s safe in the knowledge that I’m not after her job!

This is really encouraging to hear. I sometimes think I need to jack in my professional office job and get a job at my local garden centre but then I worry it would still have its own stresses and be much worse paid. But maybe I need to think again!

I only work 3 days a week but I am nearly 60. Quite frankly anything more than that tips me over the edge.

The general plan is to do 2 days a week once my state pension kicks in in 7 more years. As I have no private pension.

It astounds me how many people can keep going and going full time in their 60s it really does!

Im a sahm and my kids are both in secondary school now. My DD has minor sn so I still need to do the school run. People wonder if I get bored. Never ever. As long as I have books and a TV and a kitchen I could never be bored.

I think most people would prefer to not work if they had the choice but we have to pay the bills somehow. That's why it's called work, not play......

I don't dislike my job but obviously would rather not do it day in day out

I think that is true to some extent, but many people derive satisfaction from helping and doing things for others.
When my children were very young I trained and worked as a breastfeeding counsellor. I ran support groups, was on call for telephone support ( often overnight), I did this for several years, and didn't earn a penny.
It was hugely rewarding.

I sometimes think about how I would spend my money if I became very rich.
Yes I would buy creature comforts, travel, but I would also want to make a difference to other people's lives.
The £250,000 spent by buying a ticket to visit the bottom of the ocean in a smartie tube could have immunised 250,000 children in poverty stricken countries, built a school, could bring fresh clean water to many who don't have it.
Money is very important- and those who don't have it are up shit creek. It is sad to see the arrogance of the super rich piss their money up the wall

FIRE = Financial Independence Retire Early.

I embraced this concept in 2014, and I'll be retiring in my 50s, hopefully 57, Im now 54. If I hadn't taken action I'd wasting my time working well into my 60s not be able to do all the things I really want to . Ife is too short. It's not about being frugal and miserable, it's about getting the same happiness from life in different ways. Channelling your money where it really counts. Buy a copy of "Money or your life" by Vicky Robbin and Joe Dominguez. Follow some blogs, Quietly Saving is by a UK 50 something woman.

As an aside to my post above, I decided 9 years ago to take action, embrace FIRE and get out of work ASAP, or at least give myself choices. I'm now 54, and I hope to retire (ie not be reliant on work ever again) at 57 ish. I work a corporate job, I'm well respected, work with great people, I'm good at what I do and I'm over paid. I decided if I'm going get through work, I'll do it for the most cash possible, save like hell and get out.

To the people that say "you just haven't found the right job yet", you're spectacularly missing the point of how many posters here are wired. I have passions, hobbies, activities I want to fulfill, people to see etc, which full time work prevents me doing. Im not defined by work, so it's got nothing to do with the job. It's any job! Just one example, I'd love to cycle the length of the UK, off road, on my mountain bike, stopping off at places on the way, visiting family, taking a few months. I can't do that with 5 weeks holiday a year. My In Laws (retired) go to France for 6 weeks every year and would love us to come too, but we cant! Any full time job prohibits that. Life's on hold and it's so frustrating.

I realise bills need to be paid, I'm a realist, and I'm working my way out of this bullshit.

@SilentHedges

What is Fire?
great post by the way. I nodded along.

I'm also embracing FIRE and plan to retire early. I already work short contracts and then allow myself time off in between, which is a good compromise for now.

Work gets in the way of life

@SparklingMarkling Thank you. For FIRE explanation see my post directly above my "nod along" (love it!) post. FIRE = Financial Indepence Retire Early. Buy "Your Money or your life" Vicky Robbin & Joe Dominguez. Check out FIRE blogs. "Quietly Saving", "Mr Money Moustache" etc. This is not about being miserable and frugal, it's taking control of your money to get out of work and fulfill real meaningful ambitions asap. Or at least years earlier.

@TrundleWheel76 It feels good to have enacted a plan. Its like quietly digging your escape tunnel and knowing you'll emerge beyond the perimeter fence quicker than sitting there doing nothing. I salute you.

Financial independence, retire early.

Basically a movement for extreme saving and cheap investments with the end goal of stopping work early. The intention is not to live a champagne billionaire lifestyle, in fact the expectation is to live extremely frugally, even after retirement. But the point is that you won't be working. So you'll be rich in time.

The COL crisis has scuppered it for a lot of people, though.

I enjoy my job,nhave enjoyed almost all of my jobs. But I if I didn't need the money I'd give it up tomorrow. I just have an overwhelming feeling of having it her more important things to be doing - travelling, seeing family, exploring the countryside, spending time with friends, walking my dog, eating nice foods...
Work fulfills a function of making money, and gives me some mental stimulation...but I eouldnt say it brings me joy in particular. I certainly won't be one of these people working past the point I can manage retirement. I know I'm a cog in a machine and they can and will replace me. I just pray I have the opportunity to retire in good health and with the finances to do the things I enjoy- and my husband by my side.

@SilentHedges

Thank you!

And I salute you too. 🙂

Maybe you need a job that has no desks/offices involved

Your job sounds so rewarding @QueefQueen80s 👏 you are making such a difference in their lives x

I hear you OP. I’ve never found my niche at work and loved being a SAHM for 15 years. I remember feeling a sense of freedom when I had my first baby that my day was mine.

I now work one day/week in a professional well paid job. I don’t really enjoy the work that much but the money is good and it gives me flexibility. I have been planning a career change and taking on more work days now my dc are older but I’m not sure I’d find a job that I love and I’d have to work more days for the same money.