Can I say I can’t do certain things in jobs that are usually expected due to ASD?

[resignedtoit]

I’m getting so much pressure to do certain jobs that I can’t do. I can’t do any public facing roles at all so retail is looking hugely problematic. I can’t do care work as I don’t like to touch others / be touched / deal with personal care. Yet retail and care are the only jobs apparently available to me and I have to job search.

I just can’t do it. Can I get PIP so that I don’t have to look for work as the stress is too much , I put all my energy into looking after my dc and the stress of just meetings and looking is impacting my parenting so an actual job is going to push me over the edge. Would I even get pip for ASD ? I am severely affected

Call centre?

Something that is worth thinking about, is that since covid the world of home based work roles has opened up a lot. There are a lot of remote customer service type roles out there, some of which are phone based, a lot of which are a mix of phone and online support. There are other types of remote work as well, software is one big area, obviously, but there are others too. So what's available in your local area isn't so much of a limiting factor as it used to be. Do a job search on something like LinkedIn using the 'remote' setting on the job location filter, and it will give you an idea of what types of jobs can be done remotely. There's a huge variety these days and there might be something there which you might feel capable of.

Even if you're not going to be working straight away, it's also worth thinking about. If you do find yourself exempt from work for a while, could you use that breathing space to do some training to allow you to work remotely? My experience is that remote work does give a bit more flexibility and you can obviously control your own environment a lot better. I've worked from home for about 4 years now, and I don't think I'd ever go back to an office if I can avoid it.

The last thing I wanted to say is that if you're asked to do a capacity for work assessment, they may ask you what help you're getting to manage the challenges you face when it comes to working. So you will need to be prepared to answer that. They may have expectations (which might be very unrealistic) that you might be able to manage with support or treatment of some kind. A chat with your GP before you embark on the capability assessment route might be helpful for you to be clear about what is and is not an option for you.

Ask your work coach about the Fit To Work scheme. They will work with you to assess your capabilities and help you find something suitable.

I rarely go out , maybe once a week ? Occasionally twice a week. I think possibly I’m verging on agoraphobia

I met my dh when I was 14 he was our next door neighbour

I don’t go to the supermarket as I use online delivery and because i can’t face people we make sure he’s always here

OK how about things like animal care, dog walking, cleaning? Those don't involve dealing with the public or you being touched. Do you have any hobbies that could evolve into work in some way?

I’m not great with phone calls and speaking to people it’s unite a struggle as I have selective mutism which is such a silly name as it makes it sound like I can choose or ‘select’ when it happens but I can’t

I have phobias about animals and also allergic to cats and dogs

If you want a job where you literally do not need to talk to anyone (is that really what you are asking?) I think you will need to set up your own business and manage most of it online.

Selling stuff (ebay, vinted, amazon marketplace)? Is there a sector that you used to work in that you know a bit about - does not have to be retail sales, could be to businesses.

Or freelance design, proof-reading, bookkeeping?

Cleaning I’m really good at but I’m not sure how I’d manage as it still involves interaction? So will cause so much stress and worry id not sleep and then not actually be good due to tiredness if I could do cleaning alone then yes I’d be fine

Cleaning, factory work, picking for amazon. Theres loads of stuff out there, you can't just decide you don't want to work and there are more jobs out there then care or retail.

Can you bake? You could bake special occasion cakes. Can you draw? You could get a job as an artist or do portraits for people.

@resignedtoit What does your GP say? Have you got an official ASD diagnosis? Have you had any therapy for your difficulties?

I wouldn’t dismiss retail entirely OP. A friend’s daughter with an Aspergers diagnosis has worked in retail for nearly a decade.

She is v happy in a stockroom role and has no customer contact. She is a valued employee and has no desire for promotion out of the stockroom.

Her employers have been very supportive especially around the return to work post lockdown which made het v anxious.

I dont think selling things would bring in enough but might if I can claim pip as well I’ve put off pip for so long as just didn’t think I should but it seems the gateway benefit to have the pressure taken off me

How about cleaning or gardening?

If you don't understand, it would probably be better to be quiet than to make a fool of yourself, eh?

There's a lot of literature and web content available about autism if you want to inform yourself.

Based on what you've said about selective mutism I don't think an inbound call centre would work for you. I had a job working on an online service desk where everything was dealt with in writing, customers emailed queries and we sent responses in writing. Very few meetings, and occasionally we would call the customer to clarify something if they were really not getting it over the email discussion. Maybe something like that would work for you. That was working from home as well.

I think you are the best judge of your health and your abilities, and if you don't feel capable of working then you need to take steps to make sure you're getting all the help you're entitled to. I do agree with another poster though, don't write yourself off, there might well be something out there you can not only do, but thrive at, it could well be a case of just finding the right thing for you.

Plenty of cleaning jobs, cleaning offices in an evening or pubs before opening. School cleaners when the kids have gone home.

Gosh, the ignorance from a couple of PPs... And that is why it exactly so blooming hard being autistic and quite possibly why it's so hard getting the appropriate support.

I'm just coming on to say you are not alone OP, I'm on the NHS pathway to diagnosis and the main reason they are even letting me go through the diagnosing route is because I can't hold down a job. I used to mask my way through the working day and get burned out as a result. My last job I manged to keep for 5 years because it was only 5 hours a week and mostly teaching 1:1 to kids with medical needs (ironically most autistic too). Then got made redundant and now trying to figure out what I can actually do, without getting burned out and ill, again.

An ND friend of mine retrained in her late 30s to become whatever the professional title is for someone who cleans surgical equipment in hospitals, doesn't involve much face to face or touching people. She is not squeamish though so that helps with the presumably bloodied equipment she cleans. Before this she was a postie, which again meant mostly working as a lone wolf.

There must be some jobs out there for us autistics. Will keep an eye on your thread for ideas.

Yes I have a diagnosis . Rarely see the GP unless I’m actually really unwell so it’s not something I’ve approached them about

I think the big problems are the selective mutism and sensory issues around smells and lights etc and how they trigger migraines and vomiting I feel like I have such a narrow schedule each day to keep myself functioning and in a calm a state as possible it’s so hard to manage

I would think of work you could do and see what support is available to get you into a suitable job.

Off the top of my head, Ive thought of a few ideas that may be suitable based on limited interaction with the public and working mostly alone.

+Some kind of admin work in a quiet office or from home?

+Cleaner where you only clean out of hours? School? Office building?

+Behind the scenes working, maybe a supermarket warehouse so not on the shop floor?

+Dog walker? Pet sitter?

Try not to let your disability force you out of employment, be firm about what you feel able to do and keep searching!

The cleaning team at my work comes in before everyone starts and they work separately so each one does a different section
The only conversation is really is saying hi/morning/bye so maybe something like that could work?
It's not heavy duty cleaning, just offices so mostly wiping and hoovering

This kind of comment really shows ignorance.

Therapy doesn't cure autism. The difficulties remain. OP has a disability that should be respected.

Claiming PIP and asking UC to assess your capacity for work are both good ideas. Getting "fit notes" from your GP immediately will take the pressure off for a while.

Separately, you need to think what you could do. Self employment could be a way forward. As could training part time.

What are your strengths?