What age child do you think did these Hama beads?

[Flowersforbees]

Just that really? I feel some behaviours my son shows might indicate ASD (whispering repetition of words, overwhelm in shops but he is quite good socially). This is way more ordered than what his older sister does.

So wondering what age children tend to be when they do this kind of ordered pattern.

EbonyRaven my dc are teenagers, they could definitely do it. That’s not what the op asked though. She asked what age you’d expect a child to be able to do this.

One of mine could read before he was out of nappies. Genuinely, fluently read. He is autistic.

That doesn’t mean that the answer to ‘what age would you expect a child to learn to read’ is 2.

Nothing to do with the aptitudes of individual children. It’s about whether at 4, this is advanced, to which the answer is yes, regardless of what your dc could do. HTH.

4 or 5 years old, we often do this with our preschool kids no so nothing spectaular, if you are thinking special needs for you kid, creativity is not the be all and end all

And talking about ‘other people’s children being more advanced, with more abilities’ just makes you sound a bit thick yourself.

I have four children. They’ve all developed at different rates in different areas. One could talk very early, another didn’t speak til much later. One read at 2, another read at 6.

Child development doesn’t work like that and measuring children against each other like that isn’t on.

Try not to get too hung up on diagnosis if you think your son has certain strengths and weaknesses in development.

Support where you need to and praise the clever things he does.

Everyone is getting so focused on labeling children's differences at the moment. I know it's important to get financial additions in schools to enable support, but as a parent, be aware that some of the difficulties can be developmental as well as spectrum related.

Please don't let this sort of attitude out you off pursuing things if you think your child may be ND. As a parent of 2 later diagnosed autistic children I can tell you that the financial additions at school are hugely important for ND children, and not having access to them, and to other specific support that comes with diagnosis can be hugely damaging. If a child is ND, the earlier they are diagnosed the better. It's not about 'labelling' (hate that bloody word in this context), it's about knowing what your dc is experiencing, knowing what you are dealing with, understanding and putting the right support and strategies in place and actually, ironically, avoiding the negative and incorrect labelling that undiagnosed ND people are often subjected to, particularly in school.

Both of my autistic dc were amazing at noticing patterns, obsessed with ordering things and lining things up, but also both lacked the manual dexterity to do Hama beads like this at that age.

DD1 did that sort of thing at 3 (but was very 'able' across the board at that age, and now). DS would have been able to copy it at age 4, but not make a design like that himself - probably 5/6. 12 and 14 now and both NT.
DD2 is currently 4 and can do the beads herself but would never do a consistent design like that unaided - neither her own design nor copied.
There's a big range at that age.

It's very lovely, OP 😊

Note you are mentioning me, but not the poster I was replying to. Why is that??

I take exception to your implication that my children were backward and had few abilities, as they couldn’t do this. I still know that most 3, or even 4, year olds aren’t capable of doing this (ask a Health Visitor)!

I fully admit my children weren’t capable of doing that type of thing by the time they were 3. They preferred getting out, going places (beach, park etc.) and playing with their friends at that stage and wouldn’t have the patience to do this. However, their abilities mainly lay elsewhere, one becoming a gymnast and another a rugby player, both competing for their nation (which I’m guessing most young people haven’t been able to do?). Oh and my son did win a regional competition, for making the tallest stand alone structure, from a set number of building blocks, when he was 6 (which was quite impressive)!

They both now have Degrees (and one is currently studying for her Masters) and great careers. So all in all, I think we can agree, they have done alright for themselves. 😄

However, I was reading books aimed at adults, when I was 7 (The Royal Road to Fotheringhay and The Captive Queen of Scots, being my first 2), were you? Because, if you weren’t, does that mean you had fewer abilities than me? 🤔

My almost 6 year old would have the dexterity, but would be more comfortable with a pattern to copy. She would be able to do this, but would take her a while and take a lot of concentration. She is very artist and creative.

My just 4 year old would not have the dexterity nor the patience to do this.

I completely agree. It’s not just about getting extra funding in school either, it’s about their identity as a neurodivergent person. Otherwise they will be comparing themselves to NT peers and wondering why they are different. It has a massive impact on self esteem.

I'm not sure that people are saying that this is typical for 3/4. I think there are people on here - like me - saying that their child could do this at that age. My DD has been able to do this kind of thing since about age 4. I just checked through my photo feed to be sure I wasn't inventing it, and yes I found a photo of her doing a symmetrical butterfly pattern aged 4.5. Not all children are the same.

If it's any reassurance I was obsessively symmetrical with models (with less dexterity!) from about 2 and have grown in to a fairly functional adult without any known ND. My kids seem to be the same so I suspect it runs in families and one set of grandparents might well recognise the behaviour.

Blimey - things got a bit tense there!

Looks like there's quite a range of ages. I don't doubt that he's a bright boy, he can read reasonably well and I can stop mid sentence at any part of the faraway tree trilogy and he will finish the sentence word perfect.

He speaks in a very endearing way, a bit like an 80 year old man. Today in a shop he asked me 'what in heaven's could this be?'

I'll speak to nursery, they did bring up that he was very fixated about food and mealtimes a few months ago but this has passed. They mostly say he's had a wonderful day. He's well behaved and quiet so might just slip under the radar.

DD spoke like a "little professor" too. During her ASD assessment it was brought up that this is often how some children talk to adults but you would expect them to talk less formally to their peers and she spoke the same to everyone.

Her ASD did not hold her back at all in Primary, in fact she thrived, which is why it wasn't picked up until Secondary. A couple of comments that were brought to my attention was that at the start of reception she preferred to watch other children rather than play with them, I assumed this was because she was an only child. In year 2 I got a phone call that in creative writing she barely wrote anything compared to her other lessons. Shes year 8 now and that's a trend that has continued, she is very talented creatively if she can copy but independent freestyle work using imagination she still struggles with. It showed through things like small world play too although I didn't realized it at the time, she would perfectly act out stories and tv show plots with her toys but freestyle, imaginative play never really happened unless she was copying someone else.

I would opt for a watch and wait approach whilst it's not a problem, start saving so that you can go private and skip the (often 4+ Yr long) waiting lists and note down any quirky behaviour to help you during the developmental history interview if you go for diagnosis.

I've worked with pre school aged children for decades and hardly any would create something like this. I'm sure you know this to be the case but were just keen to tell OP it isn't anything spectacular (when OP didn't say it was anyway).

Agree that those saying a child could "typically" do this at 3-4, must know some pretty extraordinary children.

I'd say my daughter would still lack the patience to do it now at 11, as would I at 44! (And my daughter is a high academic achiever as much as you can be at 11 - and I was, as far as these things are measured).

I'd say 8 for the average child to do this? No younger I wouldn't have thought. Though of course SOME can do it younger. Like your son....

To do it at 4 is pretty extraordinary I would say. May indicate ASD, or maybe just a real talent and flair for design.

My daughter would have been 3 doing that. My boys slightly later.

I've just read the full thread. Absolutely within the normal to be saying 3, Especially girls, slightly more unusual for boys, completely dfferent brain development.
Fine motor skills are definitely miles apart for female and male toddlers.
Absolutely laughable that people are so shocked by it.

The real question is can you recreate it once half of it has fallen off the ironing board?

And can you recreate it without muttering FFS as each bead magically hops off the board each time you replace it?

This made me chuckle. This is my life!!!

My 5 year old boy couldn't do that

Surely it's pretty hard for a young child to come up with such a pattern all by themselves and execute it at such a young age. Not the same as doing puzzle where all the pieces are pre-designed

I think 3 year olds could do that - it's more whether they'd want to. My 3 year old DD can create nice patterns with beads, paints etc but it's definitely not her preferred style.

As a side note one of my DDs has ASD and pre school I couldn't see anything out of the ordinary. Keep an eye on him, he might have ASD or he might not!