Embarrassing problem - looking for advice

[LastResort1]

Right. This is serious TMI. Please look away now if grossed out. Involves poo!

After 2 x traumatic births (pulled out by forceps, cord round neck etc)...I have a problem with pooing. Had it for 3 years now.

Have to put my fingers in my vagina to push it out. It's like a bulge. I know it's prolapse obviously. Seen physio, seen NHS nurses. Given exercises and told to eat more fibre. NHS tell me to go away basically. Every time I go back to doc it's takes 6-9 months for appointment then they take a look and say no that bad, exercise should sort it. But we are 3 or 4 years in now.

Anyone had this and fixed it? I have two kids v close in age and ivd just got on with it. No one knows. Not visible so husband doesn't know. I don't wee myself. I can lift things. I just can't poo without using this gross method. I can't be like this forever!

Anyone had this and fixed it? What do I need to do?

Okay I feel I should reply to this thread, sorry OP if it seemed I was making light of your problems, I do understand as I have the exact same issue, and I only meant "not that bad" in the sense of compared to others - OP has mentioned that she has no issues with continence, and that her husband hadn't noticed. So not "not that bad" as in it doesn't matter, but just in the sense that this is quite a common problem. As others have experienced, no amount of kegels can fix it if it is related to ligaments/scar tissue. Of course OP could seek help from a womens physio, I saw one on the NHS and she was lovely, but ultimately I still have a rectocele and I still have to splint often - but from the perineum not from inside the vagina. Once again sorry for any offence caused, not intended.

Gawd - imagine you are gettin older and still fishing around with this problem?, Imagine you have arthritic hands, dementia and you are still fishing around due to this. Really need something done.
Best of luck OP.

Quite.

In the meantime, I'm focusing on the specific issue facing one specific poster.

I'll repeat my advice to the OP - for the love of puppies, talk to your husband. Tell him what's going on. Put your heads together and find a way to afford private treatment.

That thought is exactly what keeps me up at night.

@lurchermummy I didn't actually take offence really. The NHS people I've seen say exactly the same..it's common, it's not that bad etc. But I guess even if it is more common than we know...it's still AWFUL. Even the operation though apparently might not work...so maybe it is just something I have to tolerate for the next 50 years. I mean...God. I agree all nhs staff have been lovely but just lots of "exercise, diet and lots of women have it" advice but ultimately I am still doing this horrible thing to help me poo every day. I'm sorry you're experiencing similar.

@mathanxiety @projectblister I've already been private for one appointment. She gave me exercises to do. I can afford to go back just about and I will do. But I don't think the private practitioners have a magic wand. They could operate but that's not 100% effective and can come with other issues.

I won't be telling my husband. I can afford and sort private healthcare without him. He will try to look supportive but ultimately he'll be disgusted. He already doesn't fancy me. But that's another thread. Ha ha.

I agree generally though that yes we need a better healthcare system of course. 8 months between every appointment is a joke. And the first GP said "I don't really know who to refer you to" so I did some googling and went back. Womens health definitely not prioritised

The issue isn’t that doctors and nurses don’t care, it’s that women’s health doesn’t get the funding and attention it should be. We need more women doctors and researchers who actually give a toss and for institutions to pay up so cures and treatments can be discovered.
Sorry op, sounds like a very uncomfortable situation :(

I had a full pelvic organ prolapse (rectocele, cystocele and uterus) I used to have to poo as you describe and empty my bladder the same way plus manually push my uterus back inside. After 6 months of me crying down the phone to the consultants secretary I had full mesh surgery (mesh isn’t used any more)

Healing process was slow and I was pretty much bed ridden for four weeks BUT I’m all back to normal !

To add that was seven years ago and still all good

I have had problems with a consultant dismissing me out of hand for a different medical issue. I complained to PALS. They then helped me get listened to properly, and I am now getting sorted properly. Sometimes consultants see and hear what they want to see and hear, rather than listen.