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Is retirement all it's cracked up to be?

280 replies

madroid · 04/06/2023 13:08

If you have actually retired, are you enjoying it?

All things being equal, without, for example, health problems are you actually enjoying your free time? What do you do? What does your day look like?

I imagine there's a 'honeymoon' period where you relish not having to get up to go to work, catch up with all sorts of things... but then what? What have you got into?

OP posts:
Mary46 · 04/06/2023 13:17

Great thread. Are days not endless? Am thinking I would need hobbies or meet friends. But my friend says her weeks are busy.

DustyLee123 · 04/06/2023 13:18

DH retired early due to ill health. He gets up around 10.30am, uses the bathroom and has breakfast watching TV until about 12/12.30pm, then he might do a small DIY task or go to the shop, then watches TV again until bed time, and always has a bottle of wine. It’s not what I’ll be doing when I retire.

TitInATrance · 04/06/2023 13:19

I’ve never been so busy - walking, swimming, going to gigs, short breaks, dating, learning to dance, relaxing, plus all the things that used to happen at the weekend. Several years in and it’s still wonderful.

Motnight · 04/06/2023 13:20

DustyLee123 · 04/06/2023 13:18

DH retired early due to ill health. He gets up around 10.30am, uses the bathroom and has breakfast watching TV until about 12/12.30pm, then he might do a small DIY task or go to the shop, then watches TV again until bed time, and always has a bottle of wine. It’s not what I’ll be doing when I retire.

That sounds miserable

SirenSays · 04/06/2023 13:20

To be blunt the majority of people I know who have retired it seems like the women find a hobby or religion, the men watch TV and potter about and the rest drop dead with months.

Drosselmeyer · 04/06/2023 13:21

My husband is really keen to retire early, ideally around 55. I don't want to at all- feel this is going to be a bone of contention. I've also seen too many people age a decade in a year as a result of retiring- work keeps you young, or at least having daily tasks and social interactions do. Pottering around the garden is nice but is the fast track to decline.

Zippedydoo123 · 04/06/2023 13:22

I think it is good to have a two-day a week job still just to keep busy and have a purpose. That is what I plan to do. I do have many hobbies and interests though. I do think working reduced hours is the way to go. Health permitting that is.

MadamWhiteleigh · 04/06/2023 13:23

I do wonder. Everyone talks wistfully about retirement, being able to retire early etc. but for some people, I bet it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

anniegun · 04/06/2023 13:23

It is all about money. retire with enough and it is multiple holidays, days out, expensive hobbies and long lunches. Without it is DIY and gardening

BecausICan · 04/06/2023 13:24

Both my husband and I are retired. We are both very busy with different activities,holidays and socialising. I find people who are active and have interests enjoy retirement more than people who have nothing in their lives.

BelandtheDragon · 04/06/2023 13:26

While I would love to retire early I know I’ll need money to enjoy it hence need to keep working especially with cost of living. DH and I are keen to travel and spend a few months living in other countries or maybe permanently (have EU passports). I can’t wait. No more corporate crap!!! I just hope that we remain in good health to enjoy it - that is most important to me.
I have colleagues who have retired early (late 50s/early 60s) and loving it. They have plenty of money so makes it easier I suppose to do different things.

Cooroo · 04/06/2023 13:27

I was lucky to be able to retire at 59. 4 years ago. I do a little freelance work now to help finances.

I'm currently on a 2 month tour of Spain in a camper van. No way I could have done that while working!

In England I volunteer at a local community library, cycle, play in music groups, read, walk. It's a cliché but I do wonder how I found time to work.

I love it and am profoundly grateful to my prudent mum.

BelandtheDragon · 04/06/2023 13:29

That sounds wonderful Coolio! DH and I would like to walk the whole of the Camino de Santiago or certainly more than the 100km we did a few yrs ago. Spain is a wonderful country.

FairlySane · 04/06/2023 13:29

I have been retired for 5 years. We take off in the camper van from May - October. At the end of the year we have a couple of winter sun beach holidays in Nov and March.
I find the remaining time spent at home passes quickly with seeing family and friends.
Covid scuppered everything and I found it difficult to fill my day I would struggle I think being at home all the time.

PosiePerkinPootleFlump · 04/06/2023 13:33

We plan to retire early. Our plans involve lots of time travelling Europe and further afield in a camper van, entering and helping at a whole heap of international and UK trail running races, theatre, taking more active roles in our local running club, writing, getting much better at Spanish, regular swimming, volunteering and more. I'm not planning to be bored!

PlatBilledDuckypuss · 04/06/2023 13:37

I'm happier being retired than I ever was when I was at work. Filling the day is not an issue as DW has a serious condition which means I am her carer. It's not how we thought retirement would be, but it still beats working.

theresnolimits · 04/06/2023 13:37

Retired 5 years. All my ex colleagues tell me how much younger I look.

I relish every non working day. It’s my life now and I can do what I want.

Never sleep beyond about 7, never watch daytime TV. Do something physically active every day ( walk, swim, class).

See grandchildren, see children, see aged parent, travel, meet friends, do classes, coffee, lunch, museums, gigs, stand up shows. I do something active and intellectually challenging with a charity too and my retired DH does occasional bits of work.

We are lucky to be ‘comfortable’ ( when I say lucky I mean worked for 40 years, saved and planned- no inheritance) and currently fit and well. But this is the first time I feel totally in control of my own life and I love it. As do many of my friends. We’re all different but believe me, a lot of us are living our best lives.

AuntieMarys · 04/06/2023 13:42

theresnolimits · 04/06/2023 13:37

Retired 5 years. All my ex colleagues tell me how much younger I look.

I relish every non working day. It’s my life now and I can do what I want.

Never sleep beyond about 7, never watch daytime TV. Do something physically active every day ( walk, swim, class).

See grandchildren, see children, see aged parent, travel, meet friends, do classes, coffee, lunch, museums, gigs, stand up shows. I do something active and intellectually challenging with a charity too and my retired DH does occasional bits of work.

We are lucky to be ‘comfortable’ ( when I say lucky I mean worked for 40 years, saved and planned- no inheritance) and currently fit and well. But this is the first time I feel totally in control of my own life and I love it. As do many of my friends. We’re all different but believe me, a lot of us are living our best lives.

Absolutely! My life is full and I put myself first always! We have monthly breaks somewhere ( not keen on 2 week holidays), I'm always on the lookout for things to plan. Totally mobile and healthy, and comfortable money wise.
We don't do childcare for dh's gc.

honeylulu · 04/06/2023 13:43

I've wondered this because I'm planning to retire at 60 but i actually love my job (law) and will miss it. I'm planning to do a couple of days a week consultancy work at least initially. The main reason I'm planning to retire early is because my husband is 14 years older and we want to make sure we can enjoy a bit of retirement together before he gets too doddery. I'm toying with the idea of small scale property development but more as a hobby with a bit of income as a bonus. Hoping to travel a bit more. Husband's passion is gardening so no doubt he'll spend more time on that. My dad retired at 55 and I thought he'd be bored but he has done loads of community stuff - church, residents association, coastal conservation, sports club etc. He'd originally planned to do some locum work but was too busy for any of that! My mum is nearly 78 and still works part time though. Her dad still worked one day a week until he died in his late 80s!

CharlottenBurger · 04/06/2023 13:44

Before I retired in March 2022 I did wonder if I'd cope. I had heard of people who felt like they were on holiday for a few months and then missed working and got part-time or even full time jobs. DH retired one year before me. Neither of us has any regrets and we are having a whale of a time. We are seeing more of each other than we had for years. DH, despite having an OU Modern Languages BA, is doing a French course with the Alliance Française just to keep his hand in. We both have Senior railcards and bus passes so we can go for day trips. Our health has improved as we are more active. DH has lost 2 stone since he retired, due, we think, to healthier lunches and more walking. We're off to France in a couple of weeks for a city break in Toulouse. No plans to drop dead.

foxandbee · 04/06/2023 13:47

PlatBilledDuckypuss · 04/06/2023 13:37

I'm happier being retired than I ever was when I was at work. Filling the day is not an issue as DW has a serious condition which means I am her carer. It's not how we thought retirement would be, but it still beats working.

Similar here. Lots of challenges, but we have a nice life.

foxandbee · 04/06/2023 13:51

No plans to drop dead

I think it is a myth that lots of people drop dead soon after retirement. If that were true, why would there be so many older people around?

If you can survive snipers alley in your 50s, there is a good chance of you living a couple of decades longer.

MagicBullet · 04/06/2023 13:51

Motnight · 04/06/2023 13:20

That sounds miserable

This guy is also ill
The issue here isn’t being retired. It’s being ill.

And if it sounds miserable, that’s probably because your quality of life decreases when you are ill, something that often happens anyway as you get older….

madroid · 04/06/2023 13:53

Do you miss a sense of purpose?

Do you ever feel it's a selfish life? I think I'd struggle with the putting myself first always after a lifetime of being conditioned to put my family first.

OP posts:
foxandbee · 04/06/2023 13:54

MagicBullet · 04/06/2023 13:51

This guy is also ill
The issue here isn’t being retired. It’s being ill.

And if it sounds miserable, that’s probably because your quality of life decreases when you are ill, something that often happens anyway as you get older….

Yeah, that was a somewhat ableist post. It can be difficult to get out and about if you are ill or disabled. Although the chap should probably try to knock the bottle of wine a night habit on the head.