What would your ideal holiday cottage have?

[Merryoldgoat]

I’m on holiday in a very nice cottage but it’s one of those where I feel they’ve skimped a bit of functionality.

Its not a budget cottage but not the height of luxury and I feel a few small things would’ve made a massive difference.

Proper bath sheets - towels are the size of postage stamps

Thick curtains. Once it’s day they offer zero protection from the light.

Decent shower - it’s like a trickle and makes washing the beach off really hard.

Easy to use cooker/hob - we’ve got an induction hob here - no manuals and not all the pans work without putting a metal thing on the hot plate first.

What do you think is a must in a holiday cottage? I’m in a grump because I’ve injured myself. The cottage is very nice, I’m just missing.

Dishwasher
Washing machine
Decent shower
Good pillows (not rock hard or flat)
Bottle opener
Proper wine and champagne glasses
Champagne stopper
Enough crockery and cutlery
Actual roasting trays that fit in the oven so you can roast something (yes one Easter spent in an expensive cottage and the oven trays were too big)
Somewhere in the bathroom you can put your toiletries
Ditto cupboard in kitchen you can put your food in rather than have it all over the counter

Beds with no footboards, since we are tall.

It’s not something you can filter on a cottage website, and we often spend ages looking at the bedrooms one by one!

Looks like I’m not being a princess then!

There are some great bits - the garden is a good size with a nice patio and it’s completely enclosed and safe so kids can be safe.

They have a new Smart TV and the beds are comfy. It’s just a reminder I suppose, that it’s a business and margins are all. The bathroom and kitchen could do with a refresh but not essential so doubtless isn’t prioritised.

My house - spent an absolute fortune on it. Quite premium regards spade plus kitchen / bathrooms. No holiday cottage is ever the same. We have spent £6k plus or more a week in Cornwall or else ware but it's quite rubbish by comparison. I'm just going for a break and a different surroundings. Holiday cottages are that even the expensive ones - not premium ,.... hotels are better .....

Also big bathroom sinks. At the place we've just stayed, all 3 of the bathroom sinks were small, more like "vanity unit" sized, and one was a bit bigger but very shallow. Completely impractical. Hubbie literally couldn't shave without flooding the bathroom floor. It's not as if the bathrooms were small - there was plenty of room to put in bigger (more normal sized) sinks.

And on that subject, a shaving/make up mirror. In our bathroom, there was a big mirror above the loo, but the sink was in front of the window without a mirror, so Hubbie couldn't see to shave. A small portable mirror would have been very useful.

A comfortable bed, nice linen and towels (preferably white so I know they're clean) and more than one pillow per person.
A reasonably comfy sofa and furniture which doesn't look like it should be going to the tip!!
Decent WiFi and TV
Good water pressure.
Decent knives and kitchen utensils sufficient for me to actually self cater rather than one saucepan and a scratched frying pan.
Depends how long I'm staying but a dishwasher always appreciated.
Blackout blinds or curtains.

Instructions for appliances and shower
Instructions for emergencies
Mirrors at adjustable height, not just one shaving mirror at a height for a 6' tall person

It must be spotless - cannot get comfy in someone else’s mess
Preferably 2 WCs - there’s usually only 2 or 3 of us but DH takes forever in the mornings
Comfy Beds
Ability to heat the place/ dry it out on damp days
Decent appliances , which must include a washing machine and a dishwasher

List of useful numbers - takeaway, vet, restaurants, hospital , especially if the Wi-Fi is iffy.

What about a massive garden with some beehives in it?

We've got lucky with our cottage this week, just a couple of things I'd have liked:

Blackout curtains/blinds. I've been woken up by sunrise every morning.

A lighter for bbq/log burner.

Welcome basket is always appreciated and a nice touch.

Enough kitchen cupboard space to put your supermarket shopping away. So many have all the cupboards full of stuff.

A dishwasher. I don't like having more work on holiday than I have at home.

A washer-dryer is also very helpful.

Really comfortable beds and pillows.

A cafetiere. The amount of places we've stayed where I've had to go out and buy one.

Kitchen utensils. Not one blunt tiny knife and no veg peeler.

Apart from these, I don't mind much.

Def things others have mentioned like decent water pressure, comfortable mattress and sofa etc. The holiday cottage shouldn't be less comfortable than the home of those in the target market!

Decent kitchen stuff is a big thing for us so good knives and range of pans and dishes etc. If it sleeps 6 in the Lake District then you need to ensure a pan big enough to cook pasta for 6 and an oven dish big enough for lasagne for 6. While some may eat out all the time on holiday orders stay catering because they want or need to cook for a variety of reasons.

Not bothered about smart TV etc. WiFi useful but not essential.

Private parking. Nothing worse than coming back from a day out and nowhere close to park. This is a must have for us.

Lots of hooks for waterproofs, rucksacks etc.

Coloured towels so everyone knows who they belong to.

DS would say a good selection of board games without any bits missing.

A really strict no dogs rule. I won't stay anywhere that allows dogs.

Induction hob without instructions sounds so difficult.

We often lament lack of a decent veg peeler & pot lids when we go in hol cottages.

I'm a clean quiet & cheerful person, otherwise.

Well, as a 'dog friendly' cottage, it wouldn't have cream carpets all over the downstairs like the one we stayed at a few years ago when our dog found something to eat in the garden and had diarrhoea during the night.

I will bookmark this thread for when I get my fantasy cottage business up and running.

Kitchen tongs and spatula
Decent sized and quality frying pans
Hooks for towels in bathroom
Waste paper bins

Washing machine (if with kids)
Dishwasher
Large showers
Hairdryers
Wood burner
Iron
Fast WiFi
Soft bath sheets

Coat/bag hooks and somewhere to keep your shoes tidy (bonus if they're near the front door)
Basic condiments (salt, pepper, vinegar & ketchup)
At least one mirror in a well lit area, near a plug and with something to put a make-up bag or hairdryer on
A useful box with spare light bulbs, batteries for the tv remote, torch etc

A fabric sofa. So many have leather, easy clean, yes, but uncomfortable. And as others have said, instructions for things like induction hobs and microwaves. A decent collection of full-sized glasses and mugs, good range of cutlery not from the charity shop, and knives that cut. Oh, and a decent cork screw and tin opener. Obvious really.

The only problem with a lot of this is that in my experience, most guests in holidays lets ignore any instructions about recycling/rubbish and absolutely batter any equipment.

I’ve been astonished at the sheer extent of random breakages (cupboard doors, chairs), stains (blood on walls, carpets, food on upholstery, trodden into rugs), decent knives used for god knows what and left ruined with notches in the blades, pots and pans put away dirty etc. Dog shit in gardens, burn marks in sheets and towels.

Obviously, not everyone behaves like this in a holiday let but I’ve been genuinely surprised at how many do, and it’s not a cheap property.

Comfortable sofas and enough seats for the number of occupants.
Decent shower
Sockets near to the bed so I can plug my phone in at night next to the bed and use it for an alarm if needed.
Good sized mugs - recently stayed somewhere that had tiny mugs and no teapot. I like a big cup of tea in the morning.
Salt and pepper
Bath sheet sized towels. I like to wrap it around me so small towels are useless.
These days Netflix is great, if you stay in of an evening.
Clear the place of unnecessary knick knacks.
Books
If phone signal is bad, decent WiFi

A shelf in the shower so you don't have to put shampoo etc on the floor