Teenage son with very slow growth - any experiences with hospital referral?

[RedGreenBlueSky]

DS is very small for age. 13 and around 4 foot 8. Has only grown 2.5cm in the last year. He's always been on the small side but the difference between him and his peers is getting more extreme. He finally has hospital appointment at a growth clinic in next couple of months. Does anyone have experience of what to expect?

I'm feeling incredibly guilty about not asking GP earlier (we have always taken approach that his height doesn't matter and if he's happy and it doesn't bother him then all's good) but he's just never really had growth spurts and done any catching up that I was expecting would eventually come. It's started to bother him recently and he's struggling with people's comments at school. I'm 5 7 and his dad is 5 8. I always assumed he'd not be massive but at least get to my height... now I'm not so sure and am worried for him as there's such an emphasis on height being important in men.

My son is 14yrs 1month and 152cm. We had a GP appointment yesterday about his lack of growth. GP can only refer to hospital once 2 percentiles have dropped and we are right on the border of that. They will re-measure him in a month and in the meantime are doing blood tests to check everything is ok. I'm not overly concerned. He is fit and well. His brother was similar and only grew around age 16, he's not a giant now but taller than both parents.

@Aqua82 I think 16-19 is the hardest age for short young men. They are still very dependent on approval from others and rudeness about short men is everywhere. Also, a lot of girls seem to go for typical big rugby player types at that age. Lots of DS's friends were very sporty so he went to parties with girls who liked that kind and were very dismissive of him. It wrecked his confidence for a while.

But at uni he mixed in artier and nerdier circles and discovered there are a lot of girls who go for personality or style or humour or just prefer that skinny, tiny rockstar physique. Prince was never short of admirers. Honestly, he went from zero self confidence to handing out dating tips to mates! But he did work on his confidence first - really did a lot of CBT and motivational Ted talk stuff to psyche himself up to feel fine about it.

I showed my son articles about tall women who date shorter men, both famous ones and ordinary people. I made lists for him of incredibly successful short men (Hollywood is full of them! So is the music business) I just kept chatting about people I knew he'd admire and then said casually, by the way, he's only 5'6 you know. I also did a lot of putting stuff in perspective for him, as in, Yes you are very short for a man, and I know you think that's a disadvantage, but you have family who love you, that's an advantage, a comfortable home in a safe and reasonably stable country, a place at a good uni, an income from your part time job etc.

I would say, would you rather be you at your height or X (I'd point out other people who had less luck in other areas of their lives) It takes a while but keep planting the seeds of belief that being short really is only a big deal if you let it be.

I totally agree. I told him today there are so many shorter men with successful careers, families etc it's just a difficult time this age like you say.
I said he needs to work on accepting and liking himself and then he will find a girlfriend. He's only 16 so plenty of time.
I do think short men get unfairly treated.

DH grew until he was 19yo, reached 5 foot 9 or 10 (he isn’t sure and I’ve never measured him!).

Ds1 is 15yo and I think is through puberty. He is 5 foot 6, his feet are size 6 or 7 depending on what type of shoe, and they haven’t grown for well over a year. I don’t think he has much more growing to do, if any. He is by far the shortest out of all of his friends DS, but he seems ok about it on the whole, as he is 5 or so inches taller than me and that seems to be enough 😂

My dad on the other hand is 5 foot 2 and I never noticed that he was short when I was a child. He was just my dad! Someone pointed it out to me when I was about 14yo and it was a complete surprise.

@ErmWhatever my son has a growth disorder - was monitored/treated by an endocrinologist for 14 years. I think your son is 16? It may be too late but if not, time is absolutely of the essence. Book an appointment with a private endocrinologist. Often they can refer you back into the NHS for tests and things. They may well be able to tell in one appt though if your son is still treatable ie not near the end of puberty. (Bone age - which is a hand x ray and someone will need to read and get back to you on, so not instant - , testicle size and pubic/facial/axial hair spread as other posters have said.)

The Child Growth Foundation (www.childgrowthfoundation.org) are a great charity and if you phone their phone line, will be able to advise you on good private endos near you. Good luck

ps I don't know what the GPs are thinking. 4 ft 11 at 16 is surely way off the bottom of the chart?

@2022anon

Ds is 16 in Feb and started puberty age 11 so almost 5 years already. He shows all signs of puberty in keeping with his age. Facial and body hair (loads of it) deep voice and wide shoulders (for his size.)

I've mentioned to gps before about his stature but was always told he will grow and not to worry. I managed to get a face to face appointment with one gp and was told exactly the same. Phone consultations with the other 4 followed the same pattern " oh i can see you've spoke to dr so and so about this already" then completely shut down. In the process of changing gp's.

I will take your advice. Thank you.

Oh and he is somewhere in the 1st percentile

OP Im sorry i missed you can't go private. Definitely still phone the child growth foundation. They will be able to advise on things like what to say to GP (NICE guidelines on treating short stature) and may even know other routes thru to seeing an endocrinologist. As i said, it may possibly be too late, sadly.

GPs just make me so cross. Sometimes paediatricians too. Dont take growth seriously. Very best of luck.

Would any of you previous posters please provide an update on how you got on with seeking help to assist with your sons growth. Its been 18 months did any of your sons grow much since you posted last. What are the outcomes. My son is 17 and I have probably left it too late now but he does not appear to have grown in the last 18 months and is 5ft. He seen an Endocrinologist 3 years ago who concluded there were no worries, I dug out the letter at the time and it states his testosterone was 4.1. He has barely grown since and Im so annoyed now that he was dismissed at the time.

Hi, so my son had some hormone treatment. He's 17 next year and is growing very slowly. But we hope he still has "growing potential" from what we learnt in all the tests he had.

There is one thing I didn’t find out till years later and that’s the hormone for growth is produced naturally when we sleep. No issues with my DS who is very tall but the one thing he has always done is sleep a lot. His mate who he plays with on Xbox is 22 and 5ft 5 I know full well he sleeps very little and has very bad sleep habits, games all night, sleeps in late.

My son is now 15 and is still small for his age but has grown. All the tests suggest he is developing just slowly but he is going through puberty and should end up average height.

Just to give an update my son is now 5ft4 and I'm still giving him calcium, which has always helped. He has Global Development Delay so has always been small but at 13 he's starting to fit into age 12-13 clothes.

I’ve never heard of calcium helping growth . Is it worth doing that? Giving him calcium supplements every day?

My boy didn't really like dairy so he had little calcium in his diet. He started growing at a quicker rate than previously with calcium, so it's worth a try for a few months to see if it kick starts anything, good luck x

My son had all the tests at 11 and was positive for a growth hormone deficiency, he began treatment and had to inject everyday up to being 18, he was closely monitored , he was however a tiny baby and if it had been picked up correctly he ideally would have started them a lot earlier , he's now 5'8 he'd still love to be taller but I hate to think of it hadn't be picked up at all, he was small for his age against his peers all through school, no problems with puberty at all, just was lacking growth hormone.

Meant to add , He was under the endocrine team at Alderhey during treatment , they have a specialised child unit for growth hormone and puberty issues.
They do regular bone and brain scans and bloods heigh weight etc hope this helps

My 11 year has asd and I strongly suspect arfid. How did your son get diagnosed with it? The dr who diagnosed asd said he couldn't diagnose arfid

My own DS is 16 (3 months off 17) and 5'3" ... DH is 5'8" and I'm 5'2" (in fact I'm now an inch shorter than that but 5'2" is my fullest height!) so he was unlikely to be very tall, but we don't think he's grown more than an inch, if that, in the last year. I feel so guilty that we didn't take action on this earlier, because I really fear it's too late to now. He's very definitely completed puberty. We just didn't think he was abnormally short (and maybe he isn't - I think he's on the 2nd centile, someone has to be). Anyway, having woken up and realised we should probably have talked to someone about this sooner, he's just seen a GP and they'll have a look at birth weight, our heights etc and start things rolling if there's a need. I'm not sure what can now be done though.

How do you know he's completed puberty?