It's my 2nd wedding anniversary and I just want to cry

[bloodywhitecat]

There will be cards, no gifts, no hastily grabbed bunch of roses from the petrol station. No celebratory dinner tonight, no cuddles or kisses. We didn't get to celebrate our first anniversary either as DH died 15 months ago.

Our wedding day was such a happy day even though it was in lockdown and we knew he had terminal cancer (we didn't know he'd have a stroke just 6 months later which would put paid to any further cancer treatment). I am going to take myself out for a good long walk in a bit because I know our anniversary is a date that is only significant to us but it would be lovely if someone else could acknowledge it too.

Holding your hand here @bloodywhitecat

Your love for DH shone through your posts.

Sending gentle thoughts xxx

Happy anniversary! Sending you love and strength xx

@bloodywhitecat I'm so very sorry that you're having to go through this - Happy Anniversary sweetheart - you are one amazing woman and I'm sure I'm not alone in wishing you nothing but the very best today and every day. I too have followed your journey and am in awe of your strength in the face of such awful adversity and how you continue to give so much more back than you've ever taken! It's always been clear to see that the love you shared with your DH was more than special and you will carry this in your heart forever - nobody and nothing can take that away from you. I am so sorry that today will be hard for you but hope that the love and caring thoughts of all of us here will go some way to make you feel supported. Sending love, hugs and flowers

I am so very sorry for your loss and absolutely want to acknowledge your anniversary. It must be such an emotionally charged day.

Sending weirdo internet love to you xxx

Happy anniversary my lovely. I’m so sorry for your loss.

I would love to hear about him if you’re willing to share. His favourite movie, your favourite memories and the story of how you met / fell in love?

Sending you a massive hug on a such a bitter sweet day full of beautiful memories but heartache 💐

Please be kind to yourself today, OP. Commemorate how you feel appropriate. I'm so sorry that this is the hand you were both dealt. X

I think about you a lot @bloodywhitecat. He sounds like he was a wonderful man.

Does he have a grave? Maybe you could get him some flowers and go and have a chat to him and tell him you love him, although I know that might not help.

You're such a brave woman

Happy anniversary

I know its easier said than done, but I always mark special days that me and my mum had together (her birthday, Mother's Day) by buying myself beautiful flowers for my house, sometimes I just have a cuppa and her favourite biscuits while sitting in the garden in the sunshine, go to our favourite beach spot and have an ice cream. Nothing huge, but just special.

I couldn't say it better. Be especially kind to yourself today 💐

I am so sorry to read this 😓As others have said today be very kind to yourself.

Out for a long walk sounds like a lovely idea

Happy anniversary to you both. 🤍 Your husband will be by your side on your walk. Be kind to yourself.

I'm so sorry. Hugs

Exactly.

What a difficult day for you. You are very much entitled to cry

"No one is finally dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away, until the clock wound up winds down, until the wine she made has finished its ferment, until the crop they planted is harvested. The span of someone's life is only the core of their actual existence"

I find this quote always helps me accept my grief. I always used to struggle with the point of grieving, I'd shove the feelings down, think "Just get on with it". But reading the above made me accept those emotions. Because they're a ripple, a way of acknowledging that this person was here, that they existed, that that they mattered.

There are other ripples, the happy memories, the physical things he made. Other people who knew him will send out their own ripples. But this one, the grief you're feeling today, is yours. It's you telling the universe "I loved this man, and despite his absence I still do."

A close family member is in the same situation. I always send her a ‘thinking of you’ text on their anniversary because I don’t know what else to say, but I want to show I care and am thinking of them both.
I am so sorry for your loss. I will be thinking of you today and sending hugs

Happy Anniversary I want to say that simply because of the happy memories you have and to show that there's people thinking of you even if we are internet strangers

I am so sorry for your loss ❤️

Sending you lots of love on your anniversary, and I’m ever so sorry for your loss OP. A long walk sounds nice and think of the days you did get to spend together I’m sure they were so special 🩷💐

Hi @bloodywhitecat , I did not read your previous posts but having read this thread I imagine that you were blessed with an amazing love. I hope our thoughts and wishes help you through this day. Like others, I would love to hear more about your DH. He will always be here, as long as there is someone alive who remembers him. And his love continues in you.

I'm sorry 😢

Happy anniversary.

Your day sounds like a nice way to remember the good times.

Look after yourself

Oh love. So sorry. I remember your threads and your love for each other was palpable through your words. Thinking of you today

If there was a 'sticky' thread this should be it. We moan about all sorts of things in life that don't really even deserve a mention. OP have a fantastic walk and drink in whatever memories you have. Good luck for the future and thank you for posting.