DD being sexually harassed in YEAR 5!!!

[Fifi00]

This is awfully young or not? A boy has asked to touch dds bum at school today. He said he liked Kim kardashians bum then looked at her in a creepy way. I phoned the school then the little shit tried to knock on the house and go in the garden. DD was shouting and I told him to go away. We don't live in a shit hole, my DD should feel safe at home and school. I remember boys being silly at primary but not overly sexual that didn't start until year 8.

First time my daughter gets sexually harassed its in primary school. I'm devastated.

My DS is year 5 and we've been having major issues with one boy in his class who's clearing seeing/hearing inappropriate stuff at home and repeating it at school. It's awful 😞

when my dd was in Y6, a boy went up to dd’s friend and put both hands on her boobs. Over a thin shirt. This is society now. Police don’t do anything, on the rare occasions they do, the court starts victim blaming. Sexual assault might as well be legal.

There's a website that lists all incidents of sexual harassment or abuse at schools. It includes primary schools. 4 columns per page the column i counted was 22 schools, there's 21 pages for primary schools. Unfortunately this is a lot more common than people think.

It’s not uncommon because kids are exposed to porn at a young age now. DC1 primary school expelled a boy for taking inappropriate photos of girls at school.

I remember recently a thread saying it’s ok to take their 8/9 year old boys to the girl changing rooms. It really isn’t appropriate given what I heard from my DDs

I took it as she means it's not an area/school filled with little shits generally so the behaviour experienced isn't common.

That would be just as bad or possibly worse if the OP thinks that sexual assault is common in schools that have a high number of behavioral issues.

This. Such a bizarre comment

I took it as she means it's not an area/school filled with little shits generally so the behaviour experienced isn't common

It's very short sighted to assume that sexual assault and unwanted sexual attention is not common. It's prolific. A pandemic.

You kinda lost me at the shit hole comment not going to lie.
It's not uncommon for this to happen in late primary school, no.

My thoughts exactly. If your kids have the wrong post code they've no right to be safe from anything apparently

Speak to the school, teach your daughter to say "get away from me or I'm going to punch you and scream"

What has 'not living in a shit hole' got to do with anything?

Wow, some of the attitudes towards a girl being sexually harassed is shocking.

Thread after thread we talk about the way that men treat women. You do realise that these men were boys once and did not suddenly turn misogynistic at 18?

It’s not uncommon because kids are exposed to porn at a young age now.

This. It's horrendous.

I'm going to punch you....

I wouldn't encourage a young girl to use physical violence. Not only does it send the wrong message, she'll soon find out guys are physically stronger, and likely to retaliate.

I wish they'd teach self-defense at school for girls....

If you look at the Everyone’s Invited project, you’ll see that unfortunately this kind of behaviour is just as prevalent in fancy private schools. Follow up with the school and ask how they’re handling it.

This is a safeguarding issue. Have you raised it with school. Obvs needs delicate handling but he sounds over sexualised to me or in early onset puberty. I'm really not sure what the answer is but hoping the school safeguarding leads do.

Your poor DD she shouldn't need to deal with crap like this. Is she OK? I have no idea what I'd do but I'd want to castrate him....

I was similarly sexually assaulted at school (early secondary) and I don't think it merits getting the police involved, but boys who do this sort of thing should get very stern intervention from teachers and parents.

Something similar happened to my dd in yr3!!! Took it very seriously, made sure they were kept separate in class. School took v seriously, had his parents in numerous times. Kept them separate under threat of sending him to do work in heads office.
It has ceased now. But at the time it explained why dd had been suddenly reluctant to go to school which she normally loved.

Stamp on it op. Make sure the school are keeping her safe. If he has actually been to your house it can be seen as a pattern of behaviour and is harassment. Needs escalating.

Which website is this please? I can't work out how to PM you, but if you know how, you could PM me if you prefer.

This was aimed at BaronessEllarawrosaurus!

Everyone's Invited (everyonesinvited.uk)

My daughter was 9 when she told me on the way home from school that she'd been the victim of a sex crime. A boy in her class had exposed himself when she wouldn't stop playing alongside some of the other boys. When she told him he was disgusting and turned her back he then proceeded to urinate on the playground as if to justify why his penis was out of his pants and trousers. DD's teacher handled it well. DD was praised for reporting it, for how she handled it, the whole class got a talk on why it was inappropriate but did the boy get any kind of punishment - not really. (That was down to HT).
Friends DD, at a different school a few weeks earlier, had a worse experience on a play date, involving watching porn.
It's not right but it is happening all around us. All we can do is teach our daughters that it's not acceptable, to have firm boundaries, never be silenced, teach our sons as well, make sure they know things like the pants rule and stop burying our heads in the sand.
Oh & I don't live in a shithole either.

sorry i was unclear - the police comment was with reference to adult women being sexually assaulted and then getting not believed/blamed.

The good news is your dd felt confident enough to tell you this happened and she recognised that it was not appropriate. That's fantastic, she is aware that she doesn't need to put up with this sort of thing.

You now need to report this to the schools designated safeguarding lead. Sexualised behaviour is a big thing in schools and is as others have mentioned a red flag for a child being exposed to inappropriate things in their own life. They will be monitoring this boy. Urge your dd to go straight to the teacher if anything further happens, keep a record of incidents yourself.

Sorry OP.
My daughter had her chest region grabbed and many of her friends had their bums grabbed, too. All by the same child, who is protected because of his diagnosis and the school didn’t even tell me it happened, hoping it would simply go away. His teacher then told me he was “only playing”. They’re all lucky I haven’t reported them. It’s vile!!!!… I reported the incident to the social services because I am genuinely concerned for this child and his little sister.