Would you pay for a postnatal doula/mother's help?

[HBGKC]

As above, really!

I'm coming to the end of my own baby phase (I hope!), and am trying to work out what kind of job I could do in a couple of years' time, when my youngest starts nursery at 3, doing the 30 funded hours. I'll be 45, if that's relevant.

I have a large family and various other irregular commitments, so I don't think I can (yet) commit to a 'proper', full-time job. I'm looking for something I can do for a few hours each day, to earn something to contribute to the family pot. I'm not proud, wouldn't mind Ubering, but would obviously prefer to do something I found interesting, that adds something of value to people's lives.

My idea would be to offer my time, in chunks of 1/2/3 hours, morning or afternoon, to new mums. I'd come to their homes, and do whatever they needed, basically! Hold the baby while they have a shower. Make them breakfast. Change a nappy. Help them pack a bag ready to go to their newborn hearing check/baby clinic/six-week check-up. Unload the dishwasher/washing machine. Wind the baby. Support them in establishing breastfeeding, if that's their aim. Be a listening ear, particularly for them to unload their experience of labour onto - a lot of women really seem to need to talk through what may have happened to them/their baby.

Basically be a second pair of hands and a supportive presence. In terms of experience - I have had quite a few children, 3 in hospital, some at home, breastfed them all, and am a passionate supporter and advocate of women's rights around birth and their babies.

Would this interest you? And what kind of hourly rate do you think would be reasonable? I was thinking I could offer a sliding price scale depending on number of hours/days booked at a time IYSWIM.

Any takers? Sorry that was so long!

Personally no

Absolutely! I think loads of women are crying out for this sort of support, especially without having to make a big commitment to a nanny/au pair and to get someone as experienced as you. What part of the country are you in as I think that will make a big difference?

Yes. Simple as. Price would of course be the deciding factor as to whether I'd go for it, but I'd defo want to.

Absolutely if you are in a wealthy area - I was a nanny for a short while in London and one family had not only lovely me but someone else offering exactly as you say. 2 or 3 times a week - pay wise again depends where you are but in London probably £20 an hour or so

Ooh, replies already!

I'm in South-East London.

What kind of rate would you be comfortable paying? I guess there's always the option of having just an hour or two even just once a week: a slot when you know you'll have some help so can plan to get x,y and z done then.

I had 40 hours spread over 8 days when I got home from hospital, included with my health insurance. They made lunch, snacks, tea, monitored my recovery (stitches and womb contraction), watched baby while I showered, weighed baby, showed us how to bath baby and some light housework/ washing.

I would definitely pay out of pocket if I needed to.

You could do it casually or you could do the maternity nurse qualification. I charge £15 p/h for this in the NW.

i wouldn’t pay an unqualified random, no. Maybe if you were a retired midwife or a maternity nurse or a lactation consultant or something

I think it would depend on birth experience for me, whether I'd pay for the service as you describe or not.

I've just had Baby2 (3weeks old almost) and had a really positive birth, quick, straightforward, unassisted and no problems recovering either so I've had no trouble staying on top of everything including household and getting out with the toddler each day. So for me following my recent experience - no, I'd not bother.

If I'd had a C-section though, or a preemie or a NICU baby or a difficult/traumatic birth or was struggling with recovery or Pnd then I would probably opt in.

I get where you're coming from, @callmemavis, but those qualified people you mention might never have actually given birth or breastfed themselves.

I wouldn't want to go down the formal maternity nurse route. That's not really the kind of service I'm aiming to give.

Yes, I used a post-natal doula and it was fabulous. I recently tried to find one for a friend and there are a couple of websites where they advertise. I would expect you to have a DBS and some training (or be undertaking training). It was £20 an hour in London then but prices are much higher now.

Fifty years ago I had a home delivery, I booked a council homehelp for a week, it was means tested. They won't do anything like that now I'm sure so there probably is a gap in the market.

my midwife/nurse/doctor having their own children is irrelevant as long as they have the knowledge and experience necessary to do their jobs. do you check to see if the a&e doc has broken their own leg before treating yours?

So are you formally qualified, saxendaqs? Do you find there's a 'market' for your services (for want of a better word)?

I would have definitely looked into this when I had my first.

I could have done with some support to help me feel confident.

I think price-wise, I would have paid current day price of £15- £20 per hour.

In terms of qualifications - I wouldn't have minded you not having them. We had nannies when the children were younger without formal qualifications.

References, relevant experience and someone i enjoyed being around would have been what I was after.

I don’t think I would for a normal birth, but I would for a c section I think. I would pay £20 an hour.

I think it's a great idea and I would definitely use this service. As MAT pay is so terrible I'd be cautious of spending anymore than say £20 an hour and ideally be able to book in fairly short notice sometimes when things get too much (If there is flexibility)

Only things I'd look for is someone I could trust and with experience.

There is definitely a market for postnatal doulas. I would have a look and see who is already serving your area. It wouldn't be for me personally as I kind of like to be left alone, but I did have a birth doula (who offered postnatal services).

The two things I would think about are: do you really want to be doing baby stuff once your kids yet older? I say that because I have several friends who trained as doulas or breastfeeding counsellors, etc. and all of them have moved on to other work now that their dc are primary/secondary age because honestly, they are over talking about babies and the baby phase. They have more freedom now with older children and are getting back to other interests. That doesn't mean it's a bad idea, but it's just that when all you do is babies/toddlers, it feels like you can imagine doing it forever. But actually they've all largely gone back to their old careers now or moved on to other less child-related interests.

The other thing would just be able childcare flexibility. My friends who were birth doulas had to have really understanding husbands and family who could step in. Obviously, your time will be slightly more 'daytime' hours, but it will be unpredictable. You may have a 4-5 week on call period when someone could go into labour and need you that week for several days or not for another few weeks. You'd a little bit be at their mercy for when they have appts or when they need you to drop in for some urgent issue, etc. but I think if you have lots of childcare in place or a family member who can do impromptu days or all dc are in school and a partner who can do the school runs, then it's a lot easier.

This is all really helpful, thanks all.

Mavis, I think what you'd be looking for is something different to what I'd be offering... which is fine!

@mindutopia I hear you, and part of me would love to be able to do some more cerebral, academic type of work. I just don't think I'm at that point in my life yet, though. Not enough headspace.

Also, I have a profound and enduring love of newborn babies, I just don't get bored of them, ever!

Regarding flexibility of availability - my husband does actually work from home, and my eldest children are so far also around (at uni, etc), so I could probably get cover if I needed it.

To begin with, though, I'd probably just offer a morning session (or part thereof) and an afternoon session (ditto). I appreciate I would not be able to cater to everyone's requirements within those timeframes, but this work needs to fit around our family life primarily, not the other way around.

I think it might be difficult to break into, because the women who would go for this tend to be women with a high(ish) income, and those women would usually want someone with the requisite qualifications. Does that make sense?

God no- sorry not intending to cause offence but I don’t even understand the market for this.

I do! Those early days can be tough. But - and I hope this comes across in the spirit intended - I would want someone with qualifications in postnatal care, not a random who loves babies!