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Small(ish) lottery win - Do I keep it since they didn’t pay?

449 replies

swimmingforCB · 05/05/2023 20:02

We’ve had a family syndicate going for 6 months or so now. Few £10 wins etc but nothing big.

For the past 2 weeks, nobody has bothered paying in. They kept saying they’d do it next week, and then next week came and they said they’d do it that week. But everyone forgot again!

I won on Tuesday. Nothing OTT but a sizeable sum

If I keep it to myself, it’ll change my life. If I share it between the 4 of us, it’ll pay for a fancy holiday and that’s it.

What do I do? 😬

OP posts:
Toomanylatenightprogs · 05/05/2023 20:22

BarkyMatherson · 05/05/2023 20:03

No pay, no play. Those that paid that week split the winnings.

This.

philautia · 05/05/2023 20:23

They haven't paid you! It's not even a one off of them forgetting! Absolutely don't tell them, it's your money - enjoy it!!!

CrapBucket · 05/05/2023 20:23

I love my family, I would share it with them.

In laws however, not so much, I’d keep the lot.

AdoraBell · 05/05/2023 20:24

They didn’t pay so it’s only for the person who paid. I would either keep quiet or say you bought a separate/extra ticket on a whim.

Congratulations 🍾

Mosaic123 · 05/05/2023 20:24

You said it would change your life.

Would it show and will they ask questions?

Lizzt2007 · 05/05/2023 20:25

Ok so none of them have paid for the last two weeks, so personally I'd say something about everyone paying what they owe otherwise as far as your concerned syndicate ended when they last paid. Then if they pay up share it, if they don't, don't. You'll know then whether it was forgetfulness or just not bothered.

WhereYouLeftIt · 05/05/2023 20:25

"For the past 2 weeks, nobody has bothered paying in. They kept saying they’d do it next week, and then next week came and they said they’d do it that week. But everyone forgot again!"

Keep it. Since nobody - NOBODY - was paying in then the syndicate was not in operation. You continued to play the lottery for your own pleasure, and you won. Them's the breaks.

Smallfry79 · 05/05/2023 20:26

Have they ever been late paying in before and then caught up on the arrears? Or is this the first time they have not paid?

Even so I dont think you could argue that they had left the syndicate as they indicated their intention to pay and stay in.

I think for the sake of 2 weeks it would be really selfish to keep it to yourself. If they were way behind maybe but its easy for two weeks to slip by and forget to pay up when you meet.

I wouldn't be able to keep this for myself, my conscience would eat away at me.

swimmingforCB · 05/05/2023 20:27

Smallfry79 · 05/05/2023 20:26

Have they ever been late paying in before and then caught up on the arrears? Or is this the first time they have not paid?

Even so I dont think you could argue that they had left the syndicate as they indicated their intention to pay and stay in.

I think for the sake of 2 weeks it would be really selfish to keep it to yourself. If they were way behind maybe but its easy for two weeks to slip by and forget to pay up when you meet.

I wouldn't be able to keep this for myself, my conscience would eat away at me.

Everyone but my MIL forgot one other time too, about 6/7 weeks ago

OP posts:
Lindy2 · 05/05/2023 20:27

I think if they found out then you risk a family rift that might never heal. Are you OK with that?

If you're OK ditching your family to keep the win then go for it, although I think you might regret it in the future.

They should have paid. They don't really deserve the win. However, for family relations it probably is better to split it after deducting what they owe.

After this payout though introduce the rule if they don't pay up in advance they won't be part of the syndicate that week.

Watchthedoormat · 05/05/2023 20:28

I love how your husband is against playing the lottery but is happy to help you spend it😂

casingchars · 05/05/2023 20:28

I don't understand how it's morally or ethically right to expect winnings from a lottery ticket I didn't even buy.

XMissPlacedX · 05/05/2023 20:29

The whole point is that you've got to be in it to win it. Keep it

HaroldeVwilliam · 05/05/2023 20:30

Op why on earth can't you give us a rough amount if not the amount.
How close are these family people, how much do you like them.

Are that struggling, would they keep it reom you? How much do you need it?

I'm definitely thinking it's a single win for you because they didn't actually partake.

swimmingforCB · 05/05/2023 20:30

casingchars · 05/05/2023 20:28

I don't understand how it's morally or ethically right to expect winnings from a lottery ticket I didn't even buy.

That’s what I think. But I also think the feeling of ‘fuck, I so wish I had paid’ must stay with you so I feel I also morally have an obligation

OP posts:
TheNoodlesIncident · 05/05/2023 20:30

You've got to be in it to win it.

If they didn't pay in advance, they weren't in it. Simple as that.

swimmingforCB · 05/05/2023 20:31

Watchthedoormat · 05/05/2023 20:28

I love how your husband is against playing the lottery but is happy to help you spend it😂

It’s quite a bit of cash. Can’t say I would use it all for myself and leave him in his Vinted finds 😂

Plus we have DC

OP posts:
Perfect28 · 05/05/2023 20:32

Because they didn't pay in you didn't have a syndicate, you just bought yourself a ticket? How could they argue otherwise? I would tell them and treat them though, but not share it out.

Oneglassisnotenough · 05/05/2023 20:32

How much op? I’m so nosey

Helenahandkart · 05/05/2023 20:32

Leave it a couple of weeks then tell your SIL that you’ve won a smaller amount on a scratch card and offer her a share of that.

TheGriffle · 05/05/2023 20:33

Did you use your own money or money from the syndicate pot?

Dashel · 05/05/2023 20:33

rose69 · 05/05/2023 20:15

Say nothing. Stop doing the syndicate and have a small win in a months time so you can share something with your sister in law

Definitely this. Explain to them that you feel bad chasing for money all the time and it’s too hard to organise etc

Then in the Autumn have a small win and give some to your sister.

In the meantime, don’t tell anyone and don’t be seen to be spending it and when you do say you have won, I would decrease the amount or all you will get is why didn’t you split it etc

HaroldeVwilliam · 05/05/2023 20:33

Will they find out.

Why Csnt you give us the proper figure?

MummBRaaarrrTheEverLeaking · 05/05/2023 20:33

Helenahandkart · 05/05/2023 20:32

Leave it a couple of weeks then tell your SIL that you’ve won a smaller amount on a scratch card and offer her a share of that.

Scratchcard is a good idea!

SirenSays · 05/05/2023 20:33

If it was with work colleagues and badly organised or maybe if only done for a couple of weeks or a very small win then I'd consider keeping it.
But hiding a large amount from struggling family members? No I'd feel too guilty to keep it all.