Do you have a random kind of niche joke that you share only with you partner/best friend and then one day it is accidentally triggered into action with other people and you end up looking like a massively weird twat?

[ChypreNovice]

Oh god.
please PLEASE can like 300 posters come and say that they’ve done this and it’s completely fine and no one even noticed or will even remember and I don’t have to immediately resign and change my name and move to New Zealand to start a new life with a new family.

I am a senior serious person and today I agreed to be filmed for the Trust’s website using a hoist and there was a big group of my colleagues watching and then after filming started someone said “look normal” and oh god I then proceeded to make a series of incredibly weird poses with my body WITH A HOIST.

I completely lost control, and all because of that sketch. Occasionally my husband or I will say “look normal” to the other and then we do some sort of weird awkward weird pose. That’s the background but little did I know he’d been training my like some sort of hypnotic spy auto-reflex response shit.

shit

And today it was NOT my husband who said it and people were watching and it was being filmed and oh god.

Oh god

The look on their faces.

shit

Oh god I might start doing this now 😬

Oh please share some @Faircastle

When DH was learning to scuba dive on holiday he was learning hand signals and we both found hilarious that one of them has an alternate 'for when one hand is occupied' (imagining what you might be occupying your hands with out of sight under water) so there are often times when one will say are you all right? And the other yes I'm fine but one hand is occupied. Or even just do the hand signal... no one understands.

@NotAnotherBathBomb
DD (age three) said to me tonight:
"You’re making my feelings sore”. (She meant "you’re hurting my feelings"). I think it's brilliant 😂😂

If you do move to New Zealand, perhaps you will be able to use "You're a bitch, and you're going to die of diabetes" when you are having a good humoured slagging joust with somebody who you've forgotten isn't your husband and therefore hasn't seen Eagle vs Shark with you.

So many. We say 'forget you' instead of 'fuck you' from the scene in Daddy's Home two when Mel Gibson says to John Lithgow, go on give me the finger and he flips out his pointer instead of the middle finger and goes 'forget you' cos he's so polite 🤣.
We also regularly quote Mighty Boosh, WWDITS, always do the Bianca Jackson 'Rickkayyy' if we meet anyone named Ricky. We are the worst kind of people. We call rice cakes 'popcorn biscuits' in a bid to get our kids to eat them, it's stuck and our DC still use the term now they're older. DD2 is coeliac and has often asked cafes if they sell 'popcorn biscuits' and been met with

Youngest also says 'also'ly' in place of also. She just couldn't drop the 'ly' so we all use it now.

Not quite the same thing but I quite often sing random songs I'm making up on the fly. I'll happily do it in front of DP and DD, but definitely noone else.

Last summer I'm cooking dinner for myself and there's a song being composed about needing a saucepan for my beans but all the saucepans are in the dishwasher and I bet the breads gone mouldy and so on and so forth.

It's only when I finish to the sound of applause and laughter that I realise that the kitchen window is wide open and I've just serenaded the group of builders next door.

We have a lot of weird “verbs” that I forget and use outside the home. “Bacon me” means bring me a bacon sandwich on a Saturday morning, “can you dinner the cat?”, please give the cat her food, “I have outed the bin”, the bin has been put out for collection, and so on. The bin one is usually followed up with a line about it always being camp.

I call our cat “Madame” in a stupid French accent, and frequently say this to students. My current class call me Madame because I have done it so often. (I love them.)

This is so completely stupid, but years ago we had a work placement student in the job I was then in, and one of his tasks was to get the drinks made in the morning. He would always say “tea, coffee, or me?” in a silly voice, and it was (honestly) really funny. Obviously I picked this up, and 20 years down the line still say it.

I used to work with my best friend and all day long we would talk in quotes or reference stuff that had happened previously. It would probably sound like nonsense to anyone listening in. Same with DH, I can say one word and he'll know exactly what I mean. No embarrassing stories but I do find it hard to then have to spend time with people I don't vibe with.

Love these
Definitely a thing in our house. Father Ted (cows far away), Blues Brothers (we got both kinds, Country AND Western) or Monty Python (your father was a hamster and your mother smelled of elderberries) and lots of ones from when the kids were little - like the trees being covered in "some bloss" (blossom) or next-door's cat wanting to steal your money (it's a long story).

Not an in joke, but I did have to crack out my Auntie Voice with a patient and her partner who wouldn't stop bickering. Which lead to me forgetting I wasn't actually talking to my nibblings and threatening to put them into time out.

It worked, to be fair.

Hahaha that is brilliant OP!

I an awkward a LOT if that’s any consolation.

“a boy without a winkle?!” Responding to the proud parents of a newborn baby girl. Not amused. Was the first time I met them. They’d never seen blackadder

“he committed suicide, he committed suicide, HE committed suicide and the fish committed suicide” My comment to work colleagues when they were discussing tragic suicides of celebrities. They hadn’t seen red dwarf. I looked really fucking weird.

“four naans Jeremy, are you insane?” Said to totally random overweight man at a buffet on holiday. Hadn’t heard of peep show. Thought I was commenting on his weight. aargh

all quotes are used daily at home with the DC!

The other day at work we were waiting for a decision and I said ‘I feel like we’re waiting for the man from Del Monte’ and most people didn’t get it as they didn’t grow up
in the 80s (weren’t even born then). There was a really awkward silence.

@Judystilldreamsofhorses ' Can I get you anything? tea, coffee, me?' is a quote from Working Girl! Joan Cusack says it to Harrison Ford, and Melanie Griffiths says 'ha, she's a scream, isn't she?' whilst she dies of excruciation at her friend showing her up. My mum & I say it to each other all the time

Getting on a bus with people who hadn't seen the inbetweeners was awkward last week.

DS has a new friend called Duane, and every time he says it I have to add Dibbley.

One of ours is a MN line that we use all the time when someone gets what they asked for but it's not what they want it's 'cutted up pairs'.

Use 'Wanna wanna toilet' and 'Wanna wanna sweetie' from Wee Free Men. Usually when we want a treat/toilet but don't want to have to get up.

These get blank looks from anyone outside the family.

Dsis and I used to do the 'there's your boyfriend' all the time, but it came from 80s movie Casual Sex (Lea Thomas and Victoria Jackson)

My worst one is when I'm leaving from anywhere I say 'That's the news, and I am outta here' from SNL. No one gets it these days

Dagnamit! 'Pears' not pairs. I need to go to bed

Someone DP and I both worked with used to mispronounce the name of a certain country. Over several years, it became the official family name for that country. You can imagine how difficult it is to now pronounce it correctly anywhere else.

Oh god, there are so many. And I don't have the ability to filter them so I'm regularly shamed by blank faces in response.

What seems to be your boggle? from Demolition Man is one I use way too frequently considering the very very few people who get it. And I was born on the side of a hill from Bringing Up Baby when someone has one shoe on and one shoe off or is leaning. Plus CK Dexter HAAAVEN!!! from The Philadelphia Story whenever I have to repeatedly call someone...

Also, THE GREATER GOOD...the greater good... from Hot Fuzz when referencing any weirdness in our arguably quite weird village. No one in the context of those conversations ever understands why I'm saying it (and repeating it again more quietly while laughing to myself) but I just cannot seem to stop🤗

Ahhhh I’d almost forgotten about “I was born on the side of a hill”. I used to get many blank looks.

I also can’t hear the word ‘Buffalo’ (the place or the animal I guess) without singing “shuffle up to Buffalo”

WE NEED THE STUFF, à la Chandler, is one DH and I used all the time!

OMG US TOO!!!!!!

it’s the biggest compliment yet the only times I’ve used it with non family members… 😳

We (well mostly me) quote the Fast Show, so
"...which was nice" at the end of someone's humblebrag.
"This week I shall mostly be...." when making food or passing someone coming out of the loo.
"I'm afraid I was vair vair drunk" when one of us have been rambling for a while, possibly a bit drunk.
"No offence!" when asked for helpful advice on appearance.
Johnny Nice old painter (black! black!)
"Nice!" whenever anyone discusses niche music.
The what I see as the OU TV scientist whenever we talk about something sciencey.
And Ted (Ted and Ralph) when someone over-thanks me for doing something necessary.

My brother and I always quote dumb and dumber to each other 😂 G'day mate, throw another shrimp on the barbie

Or once when we were in America at Disney world over 20 years ago, there was a large couple in front of us in the shop looking at T-shirts and the lady said to her husband "hey Marv, I think we need extra extra extra large" and we still randomly say this to each other today this day and people give us weird looks 😂