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Original poster

If a young you met your children....

75 replies

Chat123 · 30/04/2023 17:38

Back when you were the same age as your children are now, do you think you'd get on?

Was thinking about this before and it's quite interesting, I think we would be friends but then again, would probably find them quite posh 😂😂

What do you think?

OP posts:

VivienneDelacroix · 01/05/2023 01:03

Ds1 (teenager) and I probably wouldn't cross paths much if we were in the same class at school. He's a lovely boy but very quiet, keeps to his little group of friends.
DS2 ( pre-teen) is probably most like my friends at school, so I can imagine being good friends with him -going to the cinema and Burger King on Saturdays.
DD (aged 7) would be a lot like I was as a child - so we'd probably love and hate one another in equal measure. She'd have terrified me but I'd have wanted to be friends with her.

Remaker · 01/05/2023 01:03

Primary school age I think I would have been friends with my DD. She was very sweet and kind and loyal to her friends.

In high school I would have found her intimidating as I was the typical awkward teenager with bad hair and acne and she has always been tall and slim with a pretty face and perfect skin. However once I got to know her I probably would have liked her as she’s still kind and a nice person, definitely cooler than I was. She doesn’t get on with everyone as she has strong opinions but I am the same so we would have had that in common.

When she was starting secondary school where she knew nobody I talked to her about being approachable as she was incredibly shy. I explained that this could be perceived as being superior or snobby which I knew she wasn’t and that someone like me would be terrified to talk to her when I was a teen! She found that hilarious but it did make her think and when she came home on day 1 she said I took your advice Mum and smiled at everyone and I made some friends!

DS I probably would have been friends with as an older teen as he’s just a friendly, kind kid and isn’t cruel or mean to anyone. We share a love of sport so that would have been a good connection.

LighterNights · 01/05/2023 01:19

StepDD, I'd be a little scared of her, she's pierced and tattooed with wild hair. I'd gave been too frightened to talk to her.

DS, he's so quick witted and popular, I'd have been too shy and nervous

DD, she has been approached in the street several times about modelling, I'd have been too intimidated to speak.

This matches the real young me, I was super shy and introverted. Then I went to uni and it all changed!

AliceMcK · 01/05/2023 01:27

Yes absolutely. My DDs are mini better versions of myself, well they are right now maybe that will change when they are older.

I recently met an old school friend, our 2 eldest DDs are both mini versions of us and are the exact same age we met, Yr6 getting ready for high school. The 2 girls hit it off just like we did at that age.

DD9 is very friendly, careing, loyal and likes to make friends I think she’d not give me a choice in liking her. She hides her insecurities just like I did so I’d think we’d naturally relate to each other.

DD5 is crazy, shy when you first meet her but when she decides your her friend watch out for trouble and being led astray. She also has a wicked dry sense of humour far older than her years. She gets in from my paternal side. Out of all 3 I think this is the one who will live her wild side like I did many years ago.

All 3 have lots of tastes and interests like mine, we all naturally enjoy the same things. I think any barriers would be social barriers, I grew up in a poor working class council estate, very basic life no frills and certainly no opportunities like the ones my DDs have. So there may be a little social class divide but I don’t think it would change much.

Cattenberg · 01/05/2023 01:27

DD is brighter and more confident than I was at her age, so I’d look up to her. But her bossiness would get right on my nerves.

NotMeSecretFormular · 01/05/2023 01:37

Really interesting concept! I think me being the same age as DD, meeting we'd quickly become thick as thieves. She's very like me at the same age but denied opportunities I had, like playing out - we don’t know other families with similar aged kids where we live, and it's not safe (kids round here from early ages wear balaclavas and carry knives, they "jump" other kids)

Enko · 01/05/2023 01:58

Loving all these replies. Let me see

Dd1 yes I think we would have been friends. Not close but friends

Dd2 no she would have seen me as boring and not her sort of person. She would however not have been mean or anything. Oddly she is very like me .

Ds yes as he gets on with everyone a social butterfly and has no care for popularity groups. Oddly this makes him popular. I likely would have been on an edge thinking he was trying something to get to bully me. Not trusted him to just be a social butterfly that thrives on people a true exteavert.

Dd3. Unsure as she is very introverted and so blooming clever I think I would have bored her. She would never be mean though and likely very patient if "stuck" with me somewhere

For dh he and ds would have Been close
He and dd2 would have bonded over drawing

Dd1 and he would not have seen each other he was the popular type she was not.

Dd3 would have kept away from him but again if stuck w hin would have put up with it. She sounds bad here she is not just takes a long time for her to let people in. She only let's those she truly feels a connection to close. She is very like my dad

CallHerJohn · 01/05/2023 02:41

What a great concept to think about!

My dd and I are very very alike in personality so we'd either be best mates or each other's arch nemisis. Ds (3) would get on with his dad, he's just like him. Mil tells me tales of woe, having to chase a cheeky mini dh around the place and that's where we are with ds.

PerfectYear321 · 01/05/2023 02:51

XelaM · 30/04/2023 17:47

My daughter would blank me. 😂 She's in the "cool crowd" and is a popular pretty girl who's into all the latest trends, very sporty and not at all academic. Pretty much the opposite of how I was 🤣She very often calls me an "NPC" (non-player character) and says that she would not have been friends with me at school and that I must have been "bear bullied" (I wasn't but was very uncool).

Wow, really surprised you admitted that! She sounds like the kind of person I prayed I wouldn't give birth to

XelaM · 01/05/2023 09:01

PerfectYear321 · 01/05/2023 02:51

Wow, really surprised you admitted that! She sounds like the kind of person I prayed I wouldn't give birth to

Show quote history

She's actually an amazing kid I wish I was when I was a teenager. Very funny, confident, popular, super sporty and always on trend. She's also hardworking and got a job mucking out stables on a local livery yard to make extra money. She doesn't say the NPC part maliciously (😅) but I definitely would not have been in her crowd as a teen. I was a very uncool nerd 🤓 who hated sports and spent time fawning over unrequited crushes on boys who weren't interested. She's like the opposite of me at that age.

RudsyFarmer · 01/05/2023 09:05

My eldest is super kind and funny. Exactly the person i would have adored at primary but I don’t remember having any boys as friends so I do t think we’d have ever really talked.

The youngest - again his school personality is so different to home. He is very funny and cute at school so I suspect we too would have been friends (given the opportunity).

eatdrinkandbemerry · 01/05/2023 09:07

Sadly no I'd don't think I'd have anything to do with them .
My kids have asd and are quiet little individuals which is the complete opposite of me.
I'd never have been unkind but I used to hang out with socially loud outgoing kids so our paths wouldn't really cross.
Ps I adore my kids and they do have friends who are more socially like them but more importantly they are happy kids 🥰

SockQueen · 01/05/2023 09:14

On a very basic level, no, I wouldn't have been friends, because I only have DSs and in my primary school the girls DO NOT PLAY with boys. Not in a particularly malicious way, the classes just fairly naturally segregated that way.

Looking at their actual personalities, I think DS1 (6) and I could well be friends - rubbish at sports, bit nerdy, awkward socially (he is awaiting ASD assessment, I'm not sure about myself). Though both of us handle our awkwardness by being in charge of elaborate imagination games so there could be some clashes there! DS2 (3) is still too little to really say, as I have very few memories from that age.

Girliefriendlikespuppies · 01/05/2023 09:19

I think so although I may have found her a little too 'quirky' to be good friends with.

I reckon we'd have got on okay though.

Phos · 01/05/2023 09:27

I think I’d find her a bit OTT

calimali · 01/05/2023 09:36

Both of mine are already adults and both are people I absolutely love to hang out with. As they have got older my relationship with both has just got better and better. In my 20s I would have loved them as friends. They have the same geeky interests as me and both wonderfully tolerant, empathetic people.

I am so proud of them.

When they were children I would have loved to be DS's friend. He has always been a very outgoing, funny person. He makes and keeps friends very easily. My DD was very much like me as a child - quieter, bookish - always wanting to be friends with the in crowd but never being 'seen' by them. Fortunately she did find he crowd and has a handful of wonderful friends that she has kept from school. I would absolutely have been friends with DD. We would have been very good for each other.

JaninaDuszejko · 01/05/2023 09:40

Interesting question.

DD1 (15) and I are very similar, both very quick witted and logical thinkers and have similar hobbies (although she is more sporty than me). I grew up in a rural area where I stood out (in a bad way) for being smart and didn't find my tribe till University. Suspect if we had both been at my school we would have clinged to each other as the only other smart girl who read. At DDs school (a big school in a middle class area with lots of high achievers and lots of clubs) we would have been in all the same classes and would get on OK but might have different friendship groups. She would have thought her Dad was 'not an annoying boy' but he was so shy and awkward that unless they were sat next to each other in a class they wouldn't ever talk. If they were sat next to each other she would have discovered he was a bit of a hidden gem and pulled him into her group of friends. She appreciates the quiet folk with depths.

DD2 (13) is very sweet and smart and loyal but less self-confident than her sister. She would have felt sorry for DH as a teenager and been kind to him and would probably hang out with me thinking I was hilarious whereas I would have appreciated her steadfast friendship.

DS (9) is full of fun and energy at home and with his friends but is quieter and very well behaved at school. He is well liked by children and adults. We would definitely have got on.

Tidsleytiddy · 01/05/2023 10:09

Myself at their age would probably have been far too much of a selfish madam for them to be interested in. They’re too nice (thankfully)

cptartapp · 01/05/2023 10:34

DS1 20 is far more confident than I was, though has inherited my bossy traits which are slightly annoying. I'd probably like his sense of humour and quick mind but find him a bit full on at times tbh.
DS2 is far quieter. Lucky to be both sporty and academic. He is more of a slow burner with friendships. Tends to keep his head down. Maybe someone I'd overlook.

Girasoli · 01/05/2023 10:46

DS1 - Is going through a typical football and video games phase so we probably wouldn't have played together at playtime. We'd probably be sat on the same table in class though so could chat about science and history and engage in maths rivalry

DS2 - wants to be a dinosaur. I also loved dinosaurs age 3 so we would be quite happy playing with all the plastic dinosaurs together

Girasoli · 01/05/2023 10:49

(We used to have these coloured maths activity books in primary school and me and one little boy were both trying to get through all the colours first)

WandaWomblesaurus · 01/05/2023 12:27

I think I would wish she was my friend because she's such a nice person. She's really intelligent and funny and kind. I could have done with a friend like that my whole life. She is what I wish I had been more like.

fussychica · 01/05/2023 13:10

DS is 30, clever, confident, funny, has a responsible job and is a very good and kind partner to his long term girlfriend. DH says he'd definitely get on with him at the same age. Share interests in football, cricket and gaming etc. I think I'd get on with him too but we might cross swords occasionally as I was less mellow at 30 than I am now.

fussychica · 01/05/2023 13:13

WandaWomblesaurus what a lovely thing to say about your daughter but don't forget she's the way that she is partly down to you.

CornishGem1975 · 01/05/2023 13:19

Yes, with my DD, she reminds me a lot of myself at that age. DS not so much. I hung out with lots of boys at school but very different to him.

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