To feel jealous of Instagrammers lives!

[Redsed]

I've finally redecorating my awful living room and wanted some ideas. A friend suggested I look on Instagram for some ideas. I don't do social media at all and omg after a few days on it and scrolling on some home improvement accounts, I feel so low about my life!

The homes are beautiful, kitchen extensions are gorgeous, the women are beautiful, the husbands with great jobs, the kids look amazing. Then there's the lovely holidays, gifts, days out. It all looks so so perfect.

My life couldn't be more different. I feel so inadequate. I didn't expect to feel like this! Was just going on to get some paint / furniture ideas!

Please tell me I'm not the only one Luke this?!

I felt like this until I realised that they're always "at work". Once I log off for the day, that's it. For them, every holiday/day out/meal is full of recording videos and taking photos followed by hours of editing. Literally every good thing (and often bad thing) in their life is work. Now I'm very glad that I'm boring old me.

It's all set design, behind the camera and the perfect living room is a pile of disorganised crap the same as the rest of us.

I know a very successful stylist on insta and her life looks incredibly glamorous, her house is beautiful and her children seem perfect. The reality is that she is so stressed, never truly happy, never relaxed, he husband and children seem to irritate her and her house decor is dictated by whichever company is currently "working" with her....ie giving her their products to photo around her house.

Insta is a fabulous tool for inspiration and ideas but you wouldn't want to live in that world.

I dont know why people always insist these things are fake tbh.
But then you say about your family member:
I remember it so vividly on her last birthday when we brought out the cake and sang for her all of a sudden she got hysterical and just started screaming “video!! Somebody take a video! Video now!!” We were all so surprised and she was so upset we had to put new candles out and start over 😄
So it WAS fake.

She was more bothered about getting the right shot for her Insta than enjoying the original happy birthday from her friends and family.

And then it's uploaded to social media like it's this lovely spontaneous, authentic video, when actually you all had to redo it for her.

She might be showing her lifestyle, but she's showing a fake version of it.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Yep. Exactly the life she presents on IG, except when she has to reset for photos and post a posed/fake/repeat event.

And you're absolutely certain she's never once done this before nor never been anything but honest...and always has perfect IG moments, kids never been difficult, no crying/screaming/messy moments etcetera

I watch some on YouTube, lifestyle and home renovation accounts, I think it’s harder to fake as obviously not snapshots but full video tours of their new expensive kitchen, garden room extension, high end bathrooms etc, they must earn an absolute fortune from YouTube as they themselves don’t appear to have another job apart from vlogging and their husbands jobs are very ordinary!, if they were married to a hedge fund manager I could understand it, but they do seem to have a bottomless pit of money, it’s quite fascinating.

No, of course the pictures and videos are set up and sometimes repeated. I meant the not fake about her apartment, her looks, her travels etc. she actually does the things she posts and she lives the way her house is shown. Im there all the time and walk in unannounced. Her place is clean and tidy and color themed at all times.
She uses a normal insta filter for pictures, not photoshop to completely change herself.

But i dont think theres anything wrong with the filters. My non influencer friends also use them 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s advertising. The same as the wholesome kids with mouths full of white, even teeth on the Colgate advert. You’re being sold stuff you don’t need by people who didn’t buy it themselves.

Have a read of Tattle. They spot all the glaring flaws and lies of the instagram lot. In fact, I'd never looked at instgram until after I'd found tattle.

Use magazines for decorating ideas.
I have an Instagram account and follow famous photographers or ordinary people posting nature/street photography/social documentary etc.
There is a lot of fakery. Just avoid.

When we sold our house the estate agent shared it on social media. The reaction was incredible. People stopped me on the street to tell me what a beautiful home I had.

I lived there 10 years and it was an absolute shit tip the whole time. It was absolute chaos. We finished the renovations just before the estate agent was due to take pics, chucked almost all our possessions into storage and dressed the rooms.

Social media is not reality. It’s not how people actually live. It’s all staged.

Don't believe all you see OP! I was amused to go to a local gastro pub recently that has a lovely restaurant recently - 3 women came in and one ordered coffee. The posing in and around the restaurant and the garden was amazing, I assume it was for insta or similar. But they had a coffee (because I guess they had to buy something as they were sitting there). I would honestly hate to have to fake a trip to a restaurant for likes.

So, she never has a messy moment, never has a load of washing in the basket, not a single thing out of place ever? Never once has kids that shout, grump or moan? Always has magical moments and is always making memories etc. Never once shouts or gets grumpy herself. Always looks glam and never a bit messy when getting out of bed, or just a bit tired, always wears lovely clothes and never a hair out of place.

...

My close friend is an influencer...I can confirm its all utter bullshit and she has poor mental health, which I believe has developed due to this "career" choice.

I remember reading about these staged props you can hire, all in a huge building they include private jets, houses, cars, landmark backdrops even water villas like in the Maldives etc... you pay a fee and spend the day taking photos with all the props, you also get wardrobe and make up so you can keep changing and then spend the next few years posting all these pics as if your always traveling in a private jet, driving luxury cars and holidaying in the best places.

It would be hilarious if it wasn't so sad.

So I'm often skeptical when I see some of these accounts now I know this.

I can’t help but think that people who are genuinely happy with their lives don’t feel the need to convince everyone they are perfect.

I don't even click on these things out of curiosity. I'm not finding anyone's instagram lifestyle or helping them to get an audience, sponsors etc

I went to Santorini a few years ago and that was an eye opener for amateur photoshoots. There were dozens of women from East Asia, mostly Korean, I think. They strutted around Oia in these amazing gowns and huge sun hats, designer shades, Chanel bags, full make-up, heels etc; always followed by a flustered-looking assistant (often their husband I think!) carrying tripods, spare hats, props, huge make up bags etc. They would set themselves up against the backdrop of one of the lovely views and get their assistant to take loads of pics of them posing. Sometimes if there was a particularly good view, a queue of Insta-women would form, all waiting for their turn to have their picture taken in posh clothes. It was fascinating and I enjoyed sitting with a beer in my scruffy shorts and vest top and watching it all happen.

And none of these people seemed to really be just, you know, enjoying being on holiday. All the things that are wonderful about being in a new place, like just looking at the views through one’s own eyes rather than a phone screen; taking in the landscape, eating the local food, talking to the local cats! It seemed like a joyless and stressful way to spend a holiday.

One of the funniest I saw was a woman sat at a piano, swaying and tapping one key with a finger, obviously she couldn't really play it (neither can I) but one comment was how lucky we all were that she, with her talent, existed in the world.
So it can be entertaining!!

I’m a detective working in economic crime, and you’d be shocked to realise quite how many of these house accounts on the gram are the product of money laundering. It’s one of the easiest ways for criminals to spend cash they shouldn’t have - paying trades cash-in-hand for home renovations. And we’re not talking your stereotypical crummy looking street-level types; I mean high-level white collar crooks with seemingly reputable business interests who look every inch the part. They ‘work hard’, but in a non-traditional sense! A real giveaway is often that seemingly bottomless pit of money… It’s a stressful life for them behind closed doors though, to live constantly looking over one shoulder wondering when the gravy train will be brought to an abrupt end, either by Police or His Majesty’s Revenue & Customs… Remember, so much of it is not only fake, but there’s also plenty that’s illegal. Take comfort in the fact that if you’ve managed to create a home you’re proud of by legitimate means, you will always have the moral high ground at least! Google police auctions to see where you can buy luxury goods seized from convicted money launderers at really reasonable second hand prices which help fund local forces - my Hermes Birkin and Kelly were ex-criminal owned and probably ‘styled’ a marble-clad dressing room shot on a few occasions in their time!!

She does of course, but she posts those too. But i mean my insta also has 99% successful days postet and all my friends do that too 🤷🏻‍♀️
Its normal and natural to take photos of happy moments and not the bad days..

@00100001 what strikes me about those before and after photos is the absence of clutter. Both those rooms could be clean-ish and tidied up in 5-10 minutes. All it would take is for the toys to be scooped up and put back into the one toy box they've come out of, a few ornamental things put back where they belong, some (no way is that a whole laundry pile) clothes folded into drawers and the hoover run round.

Most people's homes can't be put right that quickly, if at all, because of all the many possessions they own which have been accumulated over a lifetime and for which they mostly have insufficient storage.

That's another reason these influencers don't have a regular job, they're constantly selling off things they're not using. It declutters their home as well as bringing in some money. If it's something they were gifted, it's pure profit. the ones I watch get given haircare and styling products, skincare, makeup, entire wardrobes of clothes each season, electronic devices eg heat styling tools, hair removal tools etc. They don't need money to buy any of this they're getting it for free. Obviously selling it after takes a little of their time, time that working parents may not have so the clutter builds up and ends up donated or dumped for ease because there's nowhere in the cluttered home to store it until it's sold, no time to list the ads and deal with the messages/ parcels/ collections.

Not saying it isn't, but these lifestyle influencers are faking and selecting the highlights.

This! Yes!

A while ago I tried doing an account but found myself viewing my relaxing times as potential IG pics - stopped me living in the moment - and thought what the fuck is the point??

I have an interiors account with a decent amount of followers. I make a point of not following people who feature their children, or style excessively. Mummy instagrammers need not apply! I’m just not interested because it’s all bollocks. I keep it strictly interiors - inspiring rooms, decor ideas, a few antique and artisan sellers I like, diy ideas. I suppose I treat it a bit like Pinterest. You’ll find your IG tribe if you don’t agitate the algorithm by clicking on things you don’t want to see!