If you are comfortably-off and have state educated children, do you donate money to their school?

[LabradorsByTheSea]

A friend, whose business has done extremely well (now a household name) has recently donated money for a beautiful new sensory room at her kids’ state school. They are multi millionaires but will never privately educate as a principle. They’ve got great kids who attend lovely non-selective state schools. And we’ve always sent a fair sized cheque at bonus time to our son’s school, and pay for two spaces on any trips/ residentials.

We’ve got one in private and one in a lovely village school ( he will move to independent for secondary, but DD also attended a prep school so suez had a much costlier education), and it seems fair to give something, considering we could easily afford fees but DS is getting a fantastic, free education. We cannot fault his school, he’s had an amazing experience there. The HT always sends a thank you card and lets us know what the money has been spent on, so I assume it’s appreciated. And it always feels more worthwhile than our respective Oxford colleges who endlessly press us for cash.

I was just wondering how usual this is. And also, weather we should thinking about matching donations to a school in a less affluent area, as DS’s school has a very enterprising PTA, who already pay for great activities and facilities and I’m aware schools just down the road don’t have this. I’m not quite sure how to make an approach about that without sounding patronising or a bit odd.

Nope. My upper-third teacher probably did on multiple occasions did, but it evidently didn't go in, and hasn't exactly held me back. Many of my university friends are poor spellers, and have found the most effective way to overcome this is through developing the type of semi-legible handwriting that conveys the mere essence of the word.

Please do remember that belittling people by pointing out their spelling and grammar errors is the most pedantic and unimaginative type of bullying. And so I will resist pointing out the irony of you managing a grammatical error in your own 12-word post.

@L1ttledrummergirl my parents were very low income parents but felt the pressure with the letters sent requesting donations at my old school. They paid out often at the expense of us having things.
Sometimes it doesn't matter what the letters read about 'only if you can' it only adds to the shame of being poor in some cases, and people who already pay taxes should not thereafter be requested to prop their schools up. It is a self serving thing isn't it. 'As long as my dc is ok'

Even if that's simply your dc riding off the back of said donations when they are already at a school that is already benefiting from the skewed advantages a grammar school brings.

I do a small cash donation at the end of the year (gifts for teachers etc and cash gift for the classroom) to help replenish supplies for for following year. I am

I asked teacher friends before I did this to see if it was a weird thing, they did say it wasn't weird but was certainly extremely generous.

We don't have prep school fees in the budget but we have enough to be generous with small things throughout the year.

We donated to our kids' old music dept. It was exceptional, in a sea of mediocrity. Head of music was gobsmacked. I I hope it doesn't mean the academy cuts their budget, knowing we've contributed. We would have donated to the school generally, but it seems to be run by numpties.

While we have a very active PTA at my son's school, we have never been asked to make any form of additional voluntary contribution to the school. As a rural school, with a learning support unit, we have children from a range of backgrounds. As full-time working parents, we've never been able to offer much in the way of time, and so I guess money is the second-best option. I'm sure some of the PTA parents are far more generous than us if we were to translate their efforts into paid work, they are amazing and I could never put in that sort of time or energy.

Aside from the Head, no other members of staff know that we have given money to the school and so I would be surprised if it 'purchased' preferential treatment. It's not what we are after and, as far as I know, all children in the school are treated with kindness and respect (because the teachers are nice people doing a decent job). Our school welcomed several Ukrainian children last year. The headteacher was clear that any living locally would be made very welcome. We offered money to support their transition, and our donation funded interpreter costs and some additional play therapy sessions.

@whiteroseredrose
I'd consider an all-weather sports pitch a great levelling up project. Many poorer families can't afford for their children to attend sports clubs and be able to take part in sports in the winter terms as well as summer is a brilliant idea.

I'm not a millionaire so won't be building a new block for them! But yes, I donate by monthly direct debit. Seems fair enough; helps the school keep ticking over. I also donate extra for school trips so less fortunate kids can attend.

Sometimes it doesn't matter what the letters read about 'only if you can' it only adds to the shame of being poor in some cases, and people who already pay taxes should not thereafter be requested to prop their schools up. It is a self serving thing isn't it. 'As long as my dc is ok'

I think those is something about society that needs to change. There is no shame in being poor, the shame is on the business owners making vast profits at the expense of the people working for them.

Schools shouldn't have to be propped up by parents, that they have to be is a shame on our government.

@Xenia

Also how you can check the head is not simply taking the money for a luxury holiday - unlkely but sadly these things happen - do you get to see the flow of your funds to the item whih has been bought?

DS's school's "Friends of ....." is a registered charity and several formally appointed trustees (including the Head, a governor, a teacher and several parents) and the annual accounts are published on their website, alongside a detailed list of what they've spent the money on, so all very transparent.

I'm sure it's rare but there has been a case of someone stealing enough from the PTA they ended up with a suspended sentence. So it is possible.

Yes, we did.

I actually removed ds from a private school because they were so dreadful with regards to his autism. The state school were very caring and had a very dedicated music teacher but no money/facilities.

So our company sponsored their football strip
I paid for the sound and lighting for the school show
He has left now but I am currently in discussion with them with regards to funding instrumental lessons for a child who can't afford them (like the PP we won't be told who the child is)

NO : nor do I donate to the Police Service, Fire Brigade, Coast guard, NHS or the Passport Office. That's what I pay taxes for and I'm paying enough of that, thank you very much.

But we don’t pay enough through taxes to fund public services properly - don’t you want all schools to have amazing resources and facilities to offer the best to children. Every child should have, as a minimum, access to sports facilities, music education, IT departments with up to date equipment, a fully stocked library.

I don't think of it like that. I see it as helping other children to have some of the opportunities mine have been fortunate enough to have had.

I would imagine in some cases it most definitely is.

Which is why we made our donation several years after our children had left.

We don't pay enough taxes to fund public services, hence the ever increasing national debt!

Well at DS's school, the donations weren't for "normal" school activities, education, etc. They were mostly for "extras" such as kits and travel for competitions, small grants for extracurricula clubs and societies, sound/lighting for the drama dept, etc. I never once saw the "friends" buy any scientific equipment, or English books, etc for "normal" lessons - it was all for enrichment.

Speak for yourself. I pay WAY over half my salary to the government in taxation which is only going to increase. The department of education has a total funding allocated to schools of £57.3 billion in 2023-24. If you don't think that is enough, how much more would you suggest is allocated and where is that funding coming from bearing in mind 25% of the WORKING population pay ZERO income tax. And there is a thread on here complaining about prescription costs and how they should be free to all in England , where is that coming from ?.

If others want to donate to the public sector then that is down to them, the rest of us already cough up enough as it is.

Yes, our school has a direct debit system you can sign up to for monthly donations. I usually donate a lump sum at the start of the year instead though

Some of us do both @GobbieMaggie
I obviously wouldn't be donating if I couldn't afford to do so. And the fact I'm taxed masses means I can afford it.

But it is your choice, and that's fine. It really is.

Yes we pay a direct debit Boys left years ago but had a fantastic education

No shit, you do you think you're talking to? Xenia has never lived in the real world and has no concept of empathy. It's disturbing but MNHQ seem to love her, maybe she's donated some of her billions.

We could afford to but I don't personally donate apart from the odd pound here and there for fundraising activities.

Might be an unpopular opinion but I'd rather save the money for private school in a few years.....

The funding isn’t sufficient. Additionally the government aren’t funding any teachers salary increases so anything paid will have to come from the school budget. Less staff/resources for schools - is that what you really want?