I'm struggling to write in my child's reading diary

[thecoperope]

I just can't do it. I have some sort of mental block and it's really stressing me out.

I read with my child, they read alone, we go to the library and have a load of books. Reading is great ,writing is great, comprehension is great, and there are no concerns.

Except the reading diary. I just can't bring myself to take the diary out if the tables a mess, but before I can do the table I have to do the sides and then after the table I have to do the floor and put a wash on.

And if I take the book bag away from the door, it doesn't matter how hard I try I forget either the reading book or the diary, or the bag. I can't find a pen. I just get so stressed when the stupid diary is present. what do I write? Good reading? every time?

We usually read at bed time when we are all in bed. pens aren't allowed in the bedroom and book bags are at the front door. It's natural for us to read at bedtime or in the day when we are relaxing on the sofa. these aren't pen rooms. Reading books and pens don't mix! Just let us read! Why faff about?

Why do I find this easy thing so difficult? I'm retiring the reading diary.

I just don’t fill it in, me not filling it in isn’t affecting their ability to read.

I write read well to page 8, I came a pen in dd book bag so always handy literally takes 2 seconds I don't give it second thought.

We struggle with this too. Recently I've put it in my calendar for 8am on the day it gets checked, and I write what I remember of the week, usually with bare minimum of detail eg. Malory Towers, ch 1, then next entry ch 2. I skip the comments completely, and if we actually haven't done 3 bedtime reads I sometimes write fewer, but sometimes if she's done another reading type task like practising play script for drama class I include that.
In her school, the reading records are all about targets and probably something teachers are measured on somehow, so I try and find the line where it's doable for me and just ticks the boxes so the teachers don't get into trouble for having what looks like a non reader!!
Also worth delegating to another parent or to the child if you can.

Why do you think so many people are suggesting the OP gets advice from her GP? It's a type of anxiety that has attached to the reading diary in the OP's case. It's not about the five words. HTH.

I have to talk to my GP, but haven't managed it yet because I didn't remember , when I remembered it wasn't the right time, if I did it at the right time I knew it would be tricky to get an afternoon appointment and so on. It was supposed to be done while I was off for Easter hols ,but that hasn't happened either, plus now there's the added issue that I'm embarrassed it's been so long. And the days just go by ,and I'll do it tomorrow.

I'll give it another go tomorrow morning. Fingers crossed.

Some people find some things trickier than others. It is what it is.

I am thankful that my DC school only do the reading diary for Reception and Year 1. Year 2 now and she doesn't have one.

We were rubbish at filling in the diary. I did have an alarm on my phone to stop DS reading at school. He was a free reader in y1 and in y6 reading age is 16+ so I think they don't really care.

I get it, I just write the title of the book and 'read' on it but it has taken me the two weeks of the school holidays to get around to doing it.

I am also the same with writing birthday cards and wrapping gifts. I find them so overwhelming and frustrating.

Do you procrastinate lots with other things? Sometimes I find setting a 5 minute timer helps me to do the things I have been putting off.

I'm exactly like this op. I suffered from anxiety and find it very difficult to find words when writing in reading diary's. I know that sounds really ridiculous to people and I can't explain it, it's a physical thing. I went to parents evening a couple of months ago and on the way in the head gave us a pen and paper and asked if we could give some feedback about the evening and hand it back before we left. An instant knot came up from my stomach to my throat and I physically couldn't put pen to paper my anxiety went through the roof. I ended up sneaking out and the end of the evening so I didn't have to explain why the sheet was empty. I can see why people couldn't understand this because it sounds ridiculous and it is. It's a horrible way to live I just wish I was normal.

It does sound like an OCD/ADHD sort of symptom, the extreme procrastination of a dull and hated chore.

I think the getting your child to write in it and you sign it is a great idea! They’ll get to feel the accomplishment of their reading progress and you only need to sign it so it’s easier for you. Doing it together in this way might also make the task more enjoyable to you.

Op please prioritise seeing your doctor. Tell them you are struggling with si please everyday things and get fixed on routines or avoiding simple tasks because they seem overhwelming. It's not usual to feel quite as you are feeling and you need some support.

In the mean time don't fret about the reading record. Others have given useful suggestions such as a pencil in the bag, just sign and date it etc but do remember that you are managing the important bit which is the actual reading. The teacher will be able to tell because your child will be making progress.

I used to do this whilst DC was eating breakfast. Literally one sentence "Read pp X-XX of [book] - no issues", "Practiced 8x tables over dinner, no issues"
Communication diary was only if there was an issue, e.g. "DC is going home with X parent this afternoon" (used to be allowed), or "DC woke up with a headache, have given paracetamol"

I gave up with reading diaries very early on, it was turning something that should be a joy into a chore and was stressing us all out, and I told this to the teachers too. Not saying this is the ideal solution by far but it worked for us and the dcs.

The reading record is not your issue. Don't make it about that.

Ah the dreaded have-tos looming overhead.

Can you dictate a sentence to your child so they can note it in and you can initial it? Ha!

I think you fill it in while your child is doing their homework as it's 'mummy's homework'. If you have writers' block note some stock phrases down beforehand and pick one along with page numbers and title of book.

I just put really boring stuff in reading diary read well pages 1-17 tricky word "photogragh", next day read well 1-17 managed tricky word, next day read well pages 18-end no tricky words, next day read well 1-end.

You are quite fortunate it to 'get' it.

People who are a little bit more understanding and have empathy can see that sometimes people struggle and that's ok.

I rarely wrote in things like reading diaries. I'm autistic and have ADHD and what seems like an easy 5 words to you is like a mountain to climb for me. I never know how to translate from head to paper.

You should appreciate that you don't struggle, and perhaps be a bit nicer in future.

I think there might be something bigger than this going on because they are a PITA but not doing it doesn’t cause me any stress.

I can’t be bothered filling it out and we read a lot but when I get the record out it’s no longer fun for DD5 and she has no interest in homework at 7pm when we get home and have eaten.

DD’s teacher has thrown a few passive aggressive comments in my direction about it and I just shrug and walk away.

Do it in the car when you drop your DC to school. Park up . Pen in glovebox....sign. and write something like "read five pages well". Takes ten seconds. Job done

Have you ever thought you may have ADHD OP?
There's many different forms not just hyperactivity ect, look up "adhd in women" .
I'm very much like you in the sense I struggle with "simple" tasks and find things overwhelming.
Amongst many other things.

Does your child have another parent or grandparent who could write in it while you work through this?

Your GP should be able to get you some support, it sounds like you are really suffering.

As others have said, the avoidance of tasks can be a sign of neuro divergence and you can get help for it. Even if it isn't that it sounds like you need to talk to someone.

As a teacher, all we check for is that there are entries that are signed. I tell the children in my class to write in it themselves the book and pages read, then find a pen and hand both pen and diary to their adult. This may not help you though as your avoidance is very strong!
It does not need a comment, I can reassure you on that.

Do you have ADHD?

I have ADHD and find it hard also. We read a lot and he's ahead for his age with reading according to the school but the writing in the book is difficult for me.
I normally do it around 3 times a week max and put 'read to end' or 'read pages 1-5 - page 6 next.

If we read something funny or a great book - I add that occasionally. They seem satisfied and I don't write in it every day.

I read in the school with the children for a while and most parents only write 2-3 times a week.

The reading diary bit of this is a red herring.
I'm more concerned about your behaviour of having to do things a certain way eg put wash on etc.

You could take the book elsewhere and write in in seconds but something is causing you to need to do these other things first. Sounds obsessive compulsive at a minimum