When do you put baby to bed and not keep them downstairs with you?

[Itsmeitscathyivecomehome]

Little one is 9 weeks old.

so far we have just been putting her to bed in the Moses basket in the front room while we eat and relax and then just taking her upstairs when we got to bed.

Im starting to think TV and downstairs noise is more disturbing to her the older and more alert she gets. Also she is really filling her Moses basket!

at what age did you start putting baby to bed upstairs? I know recommended to keep baby with you at all times until 6 months but I obviously don’t want to go to bed at like 7-8pm.

What did you do?

Generally getting them used to sleeping through low level noise (and yea, before I’m jumped on I know there are some babies that won’t sleep through anything) is a good thing tbh.

We had a travel cot downstairs and they went to sleep in that when they were too big for a Moses basket or bassinet. It was pretty big.

I can’t remember when we put them to bed upstairs, they’re teenagers now. 🤣

Moses basket downstairs until six months. DS is a terrible sleeper anyway, so it’s wasn’t until then that it was worth trying to get him to sleep, lying down, independently, and at a reasonable hour.

We did it at about 3 months and put her in her own room at 4 months. People will disagree but it's what worked for us.

I kept her downstairs until I went to bed until she was around 3-4 months. She had colic anyway so spent most evenings in the sling.
Then I started a bedtime routine. I would put her to bed in the next to me crib and stay upstairs with her, DH would tidy up then come to bed and we'd watch TV together on our phone with wireless headphones.
DD is 6 months this week and I started putting her to bed by herself 3 days ago.

For us personally we did it at 3 months, put him in his Next To Me in our room at 7pm with the monitor and I had 2 hours or so downstairs. Then went up to bed next to him for the rest of the night.

Pretty much straight away, I think. No more than a few weeks old, at least.....I certainly can't remember tip-toeing round the living room while they slept.

Mind you, mine were always good sleepers and went through the night from 7-10 weeks, so I moved them into their own room soon after. Less chance of them being disturbed, and more room in a cot (couldn't fit cot into our bedroom).

‘It worked for us’ aka- our baby didn’t die, fairly low bar.

follow the advice rather than anecdotal evidence op, the chances of anything happening are so so low even without following all the guidelines but with stakes as high as death, is it worth the risk?

Mine stayed up with me until 6 months or so before we somewhat in vain tried putting them to bed, generally they were back out of bed and with us before we e made it to bed

@NannyGythaOgg they didn't. There were 60% more SIDS deaths "back in the day".

We waited until 8 months. 86% of SIDS deaths happen before 6 months. It's just not worth the risk to me.

7 months and still do it - she’d be fine; it’s more to keep my anxiety at bay

I watch tv upstairs when she’s settled, I’ve always done that so she’s used to having the noise and it doesn’t wake her

From about 10 weeks I think I used to go to bed with her about 8:30ish.

Somehow (20 years ago) I missed the memo keeping them in the same room, with the layout of our house it would have been difficult during the day anyway, unless you kept carting baby and crib from room to room as you did other things. So he was asleep in the crib in the front room during the day and early evening but I might have been upstairs or in the kitchen at times. I got told off by my midwife when she spotted me in Sainsburys a week after he was born (I had left him with DH for half an hour and could have been back in 5 mins if he had rung me). I would do things differently now, possibly by having more than one moses basket.

It wasn't the advice to have them in the same room 100% of the time 20 years ago. I think they did advise to have them in the room with you overnight for the first 6 months. That was the advice for DS1 who is 14 now. But the emphasis on "all sleeps including naps and evening" is much more recent, in the last 5-6 years or so.

It's safe sleep guidance. You can choose not to follow it should you think it not be right for your child. You could check on baby regularly and get an alarmed mat that detects breathing.

I know people who have their babies sleeping in their own rooms much sooner than 6 months because their bedroom is too small to fit anything bigger than a moses basket in.

I know someone who did it because the baby was making so many noises in their sleep, keeping them awake, that it was becoming a dangerous level of sleep deprivation for them. They decided the baby was more unsafe being looked after by them in the state they were in compared to the very small risk of SIDS (I think its like 1 in 4000 or something similar). Medical professionals very much agreed.

It's up to you entirely.

This 1000 times.

Reply fail.

I was agreeing with AgeGapBbe

This isn't completely true. The peak is around 3- 5 months.

Baby 2 is 12 weeks and I generally go to bed with her at 8ish at the moment. After a day with a baby and a toddler I’m knackered. Didn’t leave my older DS with the monitor on until about a week shy of 6 months, safety guidance is there for a reason although he was the lowest risk category (breastfed, good weight, no smoking parents etc)

This is quite good at explaining the risks

Oh and the reason for keeping baby in the same room for all sleep is the presence of an adult breathing near them helps them regulate their breathing. Human babies are born incredibly underdeveloped and need close contact with care givers. On the ‘how did the human race survive’ comments - we kept our babies close for survival. Just look at other great apes, none of them are leaving their babies asleep on another tree and going off

You’re best off going about normal business as much as possible so they get used to noise. Lots of babies love the sound of hoovers, and even without that most will sleep through that noise. My first DS only slept on me and I couldn’t put him down, so no housework was done then. DH used to do a quick clean when I took baby to bed in the evening. A good carrier is a good idea, most babies are happy in carriers and that’s a great way to get things like cooking done.

DC slept in the same room we were in for all naps/night sleep until she was 3-4 months. We then moved to a cot in our bedroom because DC had outgrown the Moses basket.
DC is 6m now and sleeps and naps like a dream in the cot (still in our room). Other NCT friends are having issues trying to get theirs to sleep in cots.
We only have an audio baby monitor and can clearly hear DC.
I'd just do what feels right. We feel pretty confident that DC would be fine upstairs napping/sleeping whilst we were downstairs.

My baby sleeps best with some background/white noise and worst in a silent room.

It was upstairs without us and baby monitor from about 4 months.