Page 14 | Autistic and can’t work but would like ideas of how to fill my time?

furtheringeducation · 2023-04-02T07:34:25+00:00

Once my youngest goes to school full time in September? Im thinking about a OU course but is it worth it if it’s just for me and not towards a qualification specifically for a job but just something I enjoy ? Do they ever make you go in person or a it all done from home ? Im also wondering about some DIY projects as I really enjoy this type of thing and the house does need a lot of work. I don’t really leave the house much but can get into the garden although I know nothing about gardening at all. I just don’t want to do nothing I’d like to find some things to keep my mind active

ALongHardWinter · 03/04/2023 13:39

I can't believe the level of nastiness and ignorance directed at the OP! She didn't ask for opinions on whether she is 'disabled enough' not to work ffs! There are some really unpleasant people out there. No wonder so many people with autism struggle.

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 13:44

We’ve just been digging a wildlife pond so about to fall down that plant rabbit hole .

Water lilies!!!!

maddy68 · 03/04/2023 13:54

It's not a nasty comment asking why someone can't work but can do courses. If deadlines etc are an issue so will online learning be. Perhaps more so as it's being marked and fed back

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 14:00

maddy68 · 03/04/2023 13:54

It's not a nasty comment asking why someone can't work but can do courses. If deadlines etc are an issue so will online learning be. Perhaps more so as it's being marked and fed back

OP did not ask for advice about work.

It's none or your business and nothing to do with the thread which is about hobbies and interests.

Doing courses is not the same as working.

All of this is already explained multiple times in the thread if you'd bothered to read it.

Best not to make ignorant comments about disabilities you don't understand. Strangers on the internet don't have to justify their work status or explain their disability to you to be allowed to get advice on hobbies.

Stop bullying autistic people.

HTH.

maddy68 · 03/04/2023 14:01

maddy68 · 03/04/2023 13:54

It's not a nasty comment asking why someone can't work but can do courses. If deadlines etc are an issue so will online learning be. Perhaps more so as it's being marked and fed back

Pressed send too early.

How about a creative writing course

They don't seem to have the same tight deadlines but you do have to accept their will be criticism if that's something you can handle

teacakie · 03/04/2023 14:15

maddy68 · 03/04/2023 13:54

It's not a nasty comment asking why someone can't work but can do courses. If deadlines etc are an issue so will online learning be. Perhaps more so as it's being marked and fed back

Questioning a disabled person when they have told you their limitation is nasty; at best.

camelCase · 03/04/2023 14:38

This thread has been absolutely shocking with some of the comments, I'm so sorry OP, this thread could have been full of just wonderful amazing advice, resources and support but it has been de-railed so much by some truly ignorant comments.

I am also autistic and struggle with work, many people just don't get it, on paper I seem like a good candidate for most things but my social anxiety, situational mutism and sensory issues make it almost impossible for me to work around others. I'm hoping to go into coding as I enjoy doing it but realistically I don't think I have a chance because I will struggle to be around others and that's if I could even get through an interview!

Over the years I've done many courses and some of the best places I've found are;

https://www.udemy.com (they often have sales)

https://www.open.ac.uk

https://www.open.edu/openlearn/free-courses/full-catalogue Free courses from open uni

https://www.futurelearn.com

https://www.coursera.org

and more coding specific
https://codefirstgirls.com

https://www.freecodecamp.org

https://www.codecademy.com

A few PP have mentioned checking out FE college, many have online courses including those relating to gardening (I know in my area they have many).

As a side note, I must be in the minority who hates gardening, it causes me immense stress, which is probably why I don't like going outside much, nature is a bad sensory experience for me.

I wish you well in whatever you decide to do.

The Open University

The Open University offers flexible part-time study, supported distance and open learning for undergraduate and postgraduate courses and qualifications.

https://www.open.ac.uk

MegIsWhite · 03/04/2023 14:48

As a side note, I must be in the minority who hates gardening, it causes me immense stress, which is probably why I don't like going outside much, nature is a bad sensory experience for me.

I agree with this. It also applies to me 70% of the time. I love the idea of gardening and love looove flowers (not all but generally I do) but outdoors is sensory overload to me. Perfect balance is an indoor/outdoor area where i can enjoy the visuals but with doors closed to flies and creepy crawlies, dust, dirt and the elements (except a nice breeze). 😃

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 14:52

I was wondering if it would be good to have a support thread for autistic women, where people can share interests or whatever else. Create an online community of us here. Not sure if anybody would be interested in that? Bit of a counterbalance to all the depressing and horrible threads.

I had a look in the ND mumsnetters topic and there doesn't seem to be anything like that. Not many replies to most of the threads there, which may be because the topic is hidden to avoid the type of abuse ND people's posts attract. I didn't even realise the topic existed until recently so maybe lots of other ND people don't either. Or maybe it's because we're all anti-social. 🤣

Would others here be interested in an ongoing thread like that, to just post on as and when they wanted to rather than on a specific issue? Don't want to be a sad sack who tries to start it and nobody replies. 🫣😆

MegIsWhite · 03/04/2023 14:58

Or maybe it's because we're all anti-social.🤣

😆

The expectation (and demand) to regularly post there while it's hidden may have turned some off. 😅

Would others here be interested in an ongoing thread like that, to just post on as and when they wanted to rather than on a specific issue? Don't want to be a sad sack who tries to start it and nobody replies

I probably wouldn't as it would be like speaking into the void at some point (I always stay away from such ongoing threads on mumsnet for that reason) but I'm sure some would love it and it sounds great if you would. 😊

StrongandNorthern · 03/04/2023 15:05

Second time I have commented this week (and I'm going to stop looking at MN at all because it winds me up so much).
Many (not all) MN posters are just so up themselves, deluded, and pure vicious ... I'd rather ask an opinion of a hamster.

yano · 03/04/2023 15:39

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 14:52

I was wondering if it would be good to have a support thread for autistic women, where people can share interests or whatever else. Create an online community of us here. Not sure if anybody would be interested in that? Bit of a counterbalance to all the depressing and horrible threads.

I had a look in the ND mumsnetters topic and there doesn't seem to be anything like that. Not many replies to most of the threads there, which may be because the topic is hidden to avoid the type of abuse ND people's posts attract. I didn't even realise the topic existed until recently so maybe lots of other ND people don't either. Or maybe it's because we're all anti-social. 🤣

Would others here be interested in an ongoing thread like that, to just post on as and when they wanted to rather than on a specific issue? Don't want to be a sad sack who tries to start it and nobody replies. 🫣😆

I love the sound of this!

(Did enjoy "Or maybe it's because we're all anti-social" though 😂)

camelCase · 03/04/2023 15:56

MegIsWhite · 03/04/2023 14:48

As a side note, I must be in the minority who hates gardening, it causes me immense stress, which is probably why I don't like going outside much, nature is a bad sensory experience for me.

I agree with this. It also applies to me 70% of the time. I love the idea of gardening and love looove flowers (not all but generally I do) but outdoors is sensory overload to me. Perfect balance is an indoor/outdoor area where i can enjoy the visuals but with doors closed to flies and creepy crawlies, dust, dirt and the elements (except a nice breeze). 😃

YES!! Exactly this, I like the visuals but the smells, sounds and potential for dirt, dust and bugs makes me feel ill.

Furries · 03/04/2023 15:56

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 13:30

I have that Olivia Austin rose. 😊It really is gorgeous and easy to look after but my favourite is Generous Gardener we have growing up our pergola. You need both. 🤣The David Austin catalogue is a thing of beauty but needs to come with a health warning.Ditto the new Chiltern seeds one and Sarah Raven.😍We’ve just been digging a wildlife pond so about to fall down that plant rabbit hole .

Ooooh that is gorgeous, too! I am trying to hold off purchasing until @Furries does the rose thread. 🫣🤣

The thing about gardening that is good for autism is that it has scope for loads of research, collecting and fresh air but it’s very rewarding too and good for the environment. It helps with the anxiety and you have more control over it than real life. It’s like your own little world you’re creating.I love dahlias and have quite a few pollinating varieties. Grew a few for the first time last year,didn’t lift and they’ve survived but worried about slug munching as they poke their heads up so currently have a few additions on pots incase. May lift all this year.

This is so true, all reasons why it is so appealing. And finally today, sunshine!! ☀️

I found a place in France with some really unusual dahlias:

www.ernest-turc.com

My little girl loves the pompom ones especially. They are the ones she sings to. 🥰

I grew mine mostly in pots last year to keep slugs off more easily but that meant lifting all the spring bulbs which was a PITA. This year I'm going to try leaving spring bulbs in situ in the pots and planting begonias on top for summer as they are planted so shallowly (this worked well in some pots I experimented on last summer) and put the dahlias in the ground. Mentally preparing myself for the slug war!!

Afternoon! I have started a thread over on the gardening board - it’s call The Rose Appreciation Thread. For some reason, I wasn’t able to tag you on my posts, but hopefully you’ll be able to find it.

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 16:08

YES!! Exactly this, I like the visuals but the smells, sounds and potential for dirt, dust and bugs makes me feel ill.

I get the ick very easily too - such a weak stomach and hate hate hate spiders especially - but have very robust gardening gloves. 🤣 I get what you mean, though. I love lying in a hammock in my garden in the sunshine and looking at the flowers the most.

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 16:09

Afternoon! I have started a thread over on the gardening board - it’s call The Rose Appreciation Thread. For some reason, I wasn’t able to tag you on my posts, but hopefully you’ll be able to find it.

Oh great! Thank you. That was fast!! 👏👏

Off to take a look... 💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻

Blu3Salv1a · 03/04/2023 16:26

Nepmarthiturn · Today 14:52
I was wondering if it would be good to have a support thread for autistic women, where people can share interests or whatever else. Create an online community of us here. Not sure if anybody would be interested in that? Bit of a counterbalance to all the depressing and horrible threads.

I had a look in the ND mumsnetters topic and there doesn't seem to be anything like that. Not many replies to most of the threads there, which may be because the topic is hidden to avoid the type of abuse ND people's posts attract. I didn't even realise the topic existed until recently so maybe lots of other ND people don't either. Or maybe it's because we're all anti-social. 🤣

Would others here be interested in an ongoing thread like that, to just post on as and when they wanted to rather than on a specific issue? Don't want to be a sad sack who tries to start it and nobody replies. 🫣😆

Love the sound of this.

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 17:01

Oh great @Blu3Salv1a and @yano , I'll start one then and see if we can get it going, I think it would be really nice to get some of the lovely posters on this thread and any others that want to join together, to post ad hoc and be able to share stuff we've been doing, photos of crafts or hobbies, or problems, or have a rant or whatever! A bit of solidarity to counteract the barrage of crap that autistic women deal with in life and on mumsnet too sadly. This thread showed me how many wonderful autistic women there are here and it would be nice to have a place for us to get together online, but obviously only when we feel like it. 🤣

I'll tag you two and if anybody else would like to join that would also be great. About to start dinner and bedtime drama 🤯🤯 part of day but will try to start a thread this evening if my brain hasn't melted by the time the troublemakers go to sleep.

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 17:05

Do you think it would be better in the ND MNetters topic - where lots of ND people might not see it because it doesn't appear in active threads - or just in chat but with it stated very clearly that nasty twats can fuck the fuck off? I'm sure we can see off any invaders, and it might reach more people. But could spoil the tone initially if ignorant arses have to be shoved back in their box like on this thread by @furtheringeducation .

MegIsWhite · 03/04/2023 17:40

camelCase · 03/04/2023 15:56

YES!! Exactly this, I like the visuals but the smells, sounds and potential for dirt, dust and bugs makes me feel ill.

Show quote history

Solidarity!! It's not everyday you see a fellow 'indoorsy' person. 😊

Bepis · 03/04/2023 17:50

I know I've commented on the thread before but I really like the positive turn it has taken. Love all your garden photos.

I have been screened for autism and that says that I could potentially have it and would benefit from a proper assessment. I think the waiting list is 3 years though.

What do you all think to setting up a group on here so we can all have a good chat about our interests etc?

yano · 03/04/2023 18:06

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 17:05

Do you think it would be better in the ND MNetters topic - where lots of ND people might not see it because it doesn't appear in active threads - or just in chat but with it stated very clearly that nasty twats can fuck the fuck off? I'm sure we can see off any invaders, and it might reach more people. But could spoil the tone initially if ignorant arses have to be shoved back in their box like on this thread by @furtheringeducation .

"a place for us to get together online, but obviously only when we feel like it" I feel so understood 😂

I reckon we'd be able to collectively see off any nasty twats (or we could just completely ignore them - we've got more interesting things to talk about anyway). I didn't know about the ND board on here for ages, and it could be good for other autistic women to be able to find us and join? If others would feel more comfortable chatting somewhere a bit more private I'd completely understand that, though!

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 18:08

@Bepis that's what I'd been suggesting in posts today, if I manage to get to it shall I tag you in it, too?

Bepis · 03/04/2023 18:13

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 18:08

@Bepis that's what I'd been suggesting in posts today, if I manage to get to it shall I tag you in it, too?

Yes please, sorry I haven't caught up yet

Nepmarthiturn · 03/04/2023 18:22

"a place for us to get together online, but obviously only when we feel like it" I feel so understood 😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣

This is why it will be a wonderful space for us I think!