Our family is probably somewhere in the middle (good jobs but one part time, we enjoy travel, cultural activities and seeing friends, but find too much organised fun draining and a family sofa evening) so I’ve no particular vested interest in the answer. A couple of personal experiences have just got me reflecting on this.
I’d always assumed the work less, relax more families would be happier and closer. Given everything we hear about quality of life/ work-life balance. But several friends who consciously chose this life ten years or so ago are struggling, bored and frustrated. Despite their lives seeming like a manual for wholesome living on the outside, or an extended version of what people say they enjoyed during lockdown perhaps. Their DH’s seem happy enough, but quite set in their ways, which perhaps causes tension. And friends are sad that they can’t afford to offer their kids experiences and things. And their kids seem no less prone to anxiety, troubles at school etc. In contrast, we had a rare meeting with old friends last week. Both parents very senior management consultants, employ nannies, busy social lives, material wealth. I was struck by how much their family seemed like a chaotic but loving little team, and everyone’s needs appeared to be met just fine.
I know it’s different for different families. But perhaps the relaxed lifestyle we are sometimes encouraged to aspire to isn’t always a panacea?