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To medicate ADHD or not?

27 replies

princesspeppax · 26/03/2023 19:34

My son age 6 has been diagnosed with ADHD, he is very full on 24/7, he is also autistic, he struggles to maintain concentration for longer than a few minutes and often lashes out, hits, screams and it can be incredibly difficult to cool him down. He is behind for his age because he cant sit still long enough to focus on any school work, he can be medicated but we were warned side effects can be unpleasant so what I'm asking is if anybody in same situation did they choose to medicate and did it help or were the side effects to much etc? Thanks in advance 😥

OP posts:
Newusernameaug · 26/03/2023 19:39

I’d never medicate unless it’s an absolute last resort and I’d tried everything else and only then really for health reasons, not just for an easier life.
sorry.
maybe traditional school isn’t right for him and an active approach to learning would be more suitable.

TeaandHobnobs · 26/03/2023 19:46

My DS is older but we have decided not to medicate for now - my main concerns are (1) he also has gastro issues that I’m worried could be destabilised by the appetite suppressing effects of the medication, and (2) I have a lot of anedoctal evidence from friends that children with a dual ADHD/ASD diagnosis find that their autistic traits often become stronger when the ADHD is medicated.
Having said that, if we reached a point where I felt the positive effects of medicating the ADHD would outweigh the potential negatives, I would go for it. Many describe medication as like wearing a pair of glasses, or being able to clear the brain fog - and it seems rather unfair not to give the child the option of “cutting through” the fog. But I also know it isn’t the right choice for everyone.
Remember that it doesn’t have to be a permanent decision - you can try medication, but if it doesn’t work out for your son, you can decide not to continue.

Sherrystrull · 26/03/2023 20:39

I would. It sounds like it would help his education enormously.

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pompomdaisy · 26/03/2023 20:41

I'm looking into other therapies at the moment - primative reflex integration etc

GabrielAgreste · 26/03/2023 20:44

ADHD meds “wash-out” extremely fast - this means if you start taking them and decide to stop, you can.

I have several members of the family with ADHD - all of them have had days where they’ve forgotten to medicate with no ill effects apart from a day without the benefit of medication.

My relatives have benefitted greatly from being medicated. The child is now able to access the school curriculum in a way that he couldn’t have without it and gone from “Working towards” to “Greater depth” in two years of medication.

penguinfacebum · 26/03/2023 20:47

We medicated our now 12 year old two years ago. Best thing we ever did for him. It has been life changing. Hardest decision we even made though and we debated it for two years. Good luck whatever you decide to do!

Stinkysock · 26/03/2023 20:56

Go for it, his increased engagement will support his confidence and learning.

Fundays12 · 26/03/2023 21:03

We medicated our son. He is now 11 and it was by far the best decision to medicate him. At 6.5 years old he could barely read and was pretty behind with writing and overall educationally. He couldn't focus, barely could manage to be in class, struggled with friendships and we were so concerned. The school is brilliant and has specialist provisions in place but couldn't do anymore. He is also autistic. He is now ahead in maths, at the correct level in reading and writing for his age, has friends and can focus in school. His ADHD traits were definitely stronger than his autistic ones though

Dinopawus · 26/03/2023 21:05

Medication can be long or short acting and there are different forms. What works best is very individual so what worked/didn't work for another child may affect your child differently.

NICE recommend looking at environmental factors first, before trying medication.

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng87/chapter/Recommendations#managing-adhd

Some children do seem to do better longer term on medication, but again this is individual. It might be that the medication makes is easier to access non-pharmacological therapies, or it might be that it allows the child to learn and develop.

raffle · 26/03/2023 21:07

DS (year 5) has ADHD and can't cope in school without medication. So he takes it on school days only. Weekends and holidays we don't give it to him. It's been a total game changer. He's come on educationally in leaps and bounds.

danni0509 · 26/03/2023 21:08

I don’t particularly like giving my ds 4 medications a day (including an adhd medication) but I do. Because he needs it. He’s been on all since age 7.

He is 9 now, has severe adhd, (also autism and learning disability) CAMHS and ds specialist school hadn’t seen adhd like it. Ds specialist teacher said in the 20 years he’d worked at ds school he’d not come across another child like ds. After 3 months of him being there they said they couldn’t control him and was on the verge of kicking him out. This is a residential school that specialises in challenging behaviour, it’s exactly what happened at his mainstream school which I can understand but not a school that specialises in it, he was on 2-1 in specialist school doing 3 hours a day. The behaviour he did there when he started was shocking, biting electrical cables apart, pulling toilet plumbing off the wall flooding the classroom, smashing windows, tables, chairs, they had a skip at one point full of items ds had broken. He couldn’t be around the other children (same at mainstream) He utterly terrorised his teachers. I had daily phone calls and emails. I didn’t understand the point of a special school as he was treat how his mainstream had treated him. I thought we had absolutely no hope of a future.

Ds was still waiting to be medicated at this point, he’d been diagnosed but was waiting on his appointment for medication, his specialist headteacher asked if she could ring CAMHS to speed it up as they couldn’t keep him any longer. (He’d waited 2 years for a specialist place) nothing else available and I wouldn’t have had a school for him.

He started on methylphenidate ( which he stayed on for 7 months) and it made him worse, still on part time hours, he tried a different one and similar and it made him really anxious too, couldn’t get him to leave the house on top of everything else.

At this point I was honestly wanting to give him up. I posted on the special needs board on here, honestly could not cope. I couldn’t see a way to manage him, made me really depressed too, I’d had ivf for him and I was thinking of asking social services to take him away!

The psychiatrist started him on atomoxetine and sertraline and 1 year later, he’s full time at school, out of the house for 7 hours a day. Has friends, is full time in the classroom, his teacher told me last week he’s a role model to the class 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

He’s not perfect (he smashed a window at school last week) and I still get at least one email a week with something else he’s done.

But consider everything I told you to begin with…. He’s a lot better overall.

Medication doesn’t cure it all, it enables them to LEARN. Ds is genuinely only just learning about behaviour, what’s acceptable / what is not. His brain can process things now where as before straight in one ear out the other. We’ve got a long way to go. But I can cope much better these days and social services isn’t on speed dial I’m pleased to say.

DevantMaJardin · 26/03/2023 21:09

I started medication a month ago. Life changing. People who say "I wouldn't ever medicate ever never ever not even if they were on fire" can fuck off because 99% of them are neurotypical and don't have any idea what it's like to live with ADHD or the difference it can make to get medication.

determinedtomakethiswork · 26/03/2023 21:11

I was a teacher for many years and I would highly recommend this. It's so easy to tell when somebody has taken the medication and when they haven't.

coffeeandcola · 26/03/2023 21:12

We medicated our child who is 10 and have no issues with it.

If you had asthma you'd use an inhaler, you wear glasses with poor vision. Social stigma around medication for mental health issues needs to stop so parents aren't judged for providing help to their children.

Our child has told us she's happier and school say how much better she copes now.

It's not a lazy attitude to parenting, it's giving your child the tools to cope.

DevantMaJardin · 26/03/2023 21:14

@danni0509 You've put it better than I could.

Skiphopbump · 26/03/2023 21:18

My DS was medicated for a few months the aged 6/7, the negatives outweighed the positives but I have no regrets trying.

Fundays12 · 26/03/2023 21:19

coffeeandcola · 26/03/2023 21:12

We medicated our child who is 10 and have no issues with it.

If you had asthma you'd use an inhaler, you wear glasses with poor vision. Social stigma around medication for mental health issues needs to stop so parents aren't judged for providing help to their children.

Our child has told us she's happier and school say how much better she copes now.

It's not a lazy attitude to parenting, it's giving your child the tools to cope.

I agree my eldest gets his ADHD medication and my middle child gets his inhalers at the same time. Both need them just as much but for different things.

HairyKitty · 26/03/2023 21:25

@Newusernameaug medicating a child with ADHD so that they can access an education (dont you think that’s every child right?) isn’t a social or lifestyle choice of convenience!

Shopper727 · 26/03/2023 21:29

My son is also medicated. On his second medication as the first did not suit. I thought long and hard about it and decided to try as it couldn’t make things worse and it has absolutely improved things, I think he needs a bigger dose at the moment but no side effects I’ve noticed or he’s reported. If it makes a difference for school then it’s absolutely worth it, our journey has only just started, so things will change but I don’t regret my decision

Lemursandions · 26/03/2023 21:30

My primary school DS takes meds for his ADHD. Has transformed his life at school for the better - I wish he’d been able to take it at a younger age so he wouldn’t have had so much damage done to his mental health.

like others he doesn’t take it at weekends and holidays as it suppresses his appetite. He is very happy taking it on school days as he says it gives him a break from his thoughts.

IkeNoNo · 26/03/2023 21:32

I don't understand why so many people are so against meditation?

A close family member of mine feels that their parents were negligent in not allowing them to be medicated as a child. They went through the process of accessing medication themselves as a young adult and they have a lot of residual anger towards their parents as an adult.

Lemursandions · 26/03/2023 21:35

Sadly other people ( and many schools) are very judgemental about lots of things to do with ADHD - still seems to be a lot of belief that it’s just something that can be ‘controlled’ and that children are deliberately being naughty and/or have lax parents.

My DS’s school actually said to me it was only when my NT younger child started school they realised it might not just be my parenting …

TwinsAndTiramisu · 26/03/2023 21:39

IkeNoNo · 26/03/2023 21:32

I don't understand why so many people are so against meditation?

A close family member of mine feels that their parents were negligent in not allowing them to be medicated as a child. They went through the process of accessing medication themselves as a young adult and they have a lot of residual anger towards their parents as an adult.

Because they don't understand ADHD. They might make all the noises that suggest they do. But they genuinely think it can be "talked" out of a child with therapy. Or different parenting strategies.

They literally don't get it's a physical medical condition and their suggestions are no different to telling the parent of a child with haemophilia, "well, I'd only use medication as a last resort."

Echobelly · 26/03/2023 21:41

I would in your situation.

DS is on meds for inattentive ADHD since he was 8 (he is 11 now) and it's been a great help for school. I know our situation is different, no major behavioural issues, but it's definitely been a help. It doesn't at all 'change' him as a person, in fact he says he doesn't feel any different when he takes it (which is good in my book); it's just he's able to start on things and see them through, which he has immense difficulty with otherwise. As others above, he only takes on school days, or sometimes a lower dose at weekends if he has a lot of homework, or for things like summer camp where it might help him follow everything that's going on better.

We support his choices about the medication - it was his spontaneous suggestion to have a lower dose option for those times and I think that helps him feel positive about it.

Midgeymoo12 · 26/03/2023 21:48

Yes you should try the medication. It is such a shame that there is such stigma around ADHD / autism / neurological conditions. As others have said - if you had asthma or diabetes you would not hesitate to medicate. I appreciate medications have side effects but why is there such soul searching and hesitation regarding medication for ADHD?

The medication has a very positive effect for my son at school and at home, and fortunately no significant side effects.

You can try and stop if he doesn’t get along with them, or try other options.

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