How not to embarrass your child as they go into Y7

[KindergartenKop]

DS is going into Y7 in September. I've got to get him a load of stuff like a school bag, pencil case etc etc.

What should I avoid doing/saying/getting as he goes into secondary. DS doesn't necessarily know either! My Little Pony pencil case? 🐎

Some dyspraxic kids still struggle with laces at the start of secondary school. Elastic triathlon laces are a less noticeable alternative if this is an issue for a child.

We did have some of those things that you attach to their laces and they just pull the toggle to tighten them but they were a faff and snapped in the end.

Yeah ours are banned on school premises and they are only supposed to wear black ones out of school when they are in uniform which seems bonkers to me

Im sorry for hijacking the thread but thank you. I'm going to have a look at these for my son as it will widen the choice of footwear he can have.

He has learned to tie a tie but his dyspraxia makes tying laces too fiddly for him and by the time he's halfway through, his brain can't catch up with what he's supposed to do next, due to his processing.

It's nice to be reminded by the other poster that he's behind children in year two in this aspect of his learning as well.

My ds wore riptape shoes until he became interested in girls. It was never an issue but that may have been because he was oblivious to other's opinions. Don't say he's useless - that stuff lives inside forever.

When they bring friends round it's ok to say "hello" and offer food.

Further interaction should be avoided unless the friend initiates it. Which won't be until at least age 16.

School isn't seemingly as viscous as when I were a lass...
Boys tend to still go for Adidas and Nike trainers and branded coats, the girls love anything from Primark!
Go and sit outside one day and see what they all have before he starts.

Wear a T-shirt with a baby photo of him on. On the back you should get printed I’m Ds name’s mum (you could add his form number for extra points).

Hug him at every opportunity.

Play ABBA really loudly in the car if you ever pick him up.

or threaten to do all this if he ever misbehaves 😉

Oh except bags! Girls have River Island or Ted Baker bags!!!

If you don’t need to buy new bags and pencil cases for the start of term then don’t. Let him figure out what’s best once he’s there.

dc2 had his favourite shoes which were Velcro fastening for years 7 and 8. They were Geox Savage. He could tie his laces just fine but liked those particularly shoes - he’d had them for years in primary too! He only changed once they stopped doing them in his size!

ours have to have the set school coat so no decision to be made there.

Don’t need to take everything in on the first day. unless the school asks for PE kit for the first day don’t bother sending him in with his indoor and outdoor kit ‘just in case’.

Some year 7s can barely carry their own backpack as they’ve got a dictionary in English and in French ‘just in case’.

My son can't do laces, he has slip on leather school shoes, next and m&s both have good ranges. Has the no tie laces on his pe trainers and football boots https://www.amazon.co.uk/Hilelife-Elastic-Tie-Shoelaces-Reflective/dp/B077SD2X48/ref=asc_df_B077SD2X48/

Be invisible.

Buy all plain stationery, nothing that could cause any kind of comment.
Keep a stock of stationery at home, because pens/pencils etc will go missing every few days and kids get into trouble if they don’t have the right stuff.

Coats are a minefield. If you buy a cheap generic coat they won’t wear it. If you buy a trendy branded coat then they’ll lose it. Hopefully it’ll be warm enough in September for a coat not to be needed straight away.

At my son’s school he’d have been teased if he didn’t have lace ups.

My Ds is in secondary school...he has only ever had a plain, see through pencil case. No lunchbox either...just a tupperware or I use food bags. Ds has to have the school bag with the school logo but if it was free choice he'd have a black Nike rucksack.

Ds wore Velcro shoes (and trainers for PE) until around year 9. No one said anything, but from year 10 he chose shoes (from Clarks) that looked like they were laced but weren't, if that makes sense.
Like these ones

He can do laces, just finds them a hassle. He chooses bungee laces for his PE trainers.

If he's bothered and can't do laces, then buy some black elastic, and take the original laces out and replace them with the elastic. That way it looks like laces, but he can slip them on and off for PE.

Never be seen in public with them ever again. If you do ever have to go into town with them, you must walk 20 feet behind them and not acknowledge they exist.

This starts in year 7 and as we know too well here, increases in importance into year 11.

They need to make their own way to school either by walking or bus

My ds insists on kickers... apparently all the boys wear them. Dd wears kickers too for school. To be fair, they are really good and last well. Definitely worth the money.

Don't drop him off dressed as cruella de ville and beep your horn when you see his mates!

(World book day in my school in my defence!)

I read this as knickers 😂

I spend much of my time seeing classes in and out repeating your lace is undone - he will fit right in

Would it be ok to discretely label clothes, inside shoes, water bottles etc with name label stikins?

Don’t assume that because MN is telling you something, then it’s right.

My dcs both wore coats in winter, as all of the friends did.
Pencil case was ‘funky’, lots of colours etc… chosen by them. Never been an issue.
Follow the school uniform. That always helps.
Treat them like secondary school kid. That make their way to school on their own if they can etc…

Fwiw I’ve never had the ‘im ignoring you if I meet you up in the street’ thing either…

I write my ds name on everything... usually in biro on the label