What three things do most people In your life now not know about you?

[Embelline]

I’m talking about friends rather than close family, DH etc.
friend and I were just talking about all the little quirks people have and the interesting experiences in their past which they might not share now because they don’t think about them or they just wouldn’t come up (or they might not want to!)

I didn’t think I really had any but actually:

1. I published three erotic fiction books when I was younger (cannot bring myself to read them now I think I’d die of embarrassment)

2. I can’t point my toes or scrunch my toes as I broke them without realising doing ballet and they knitted together incorrectly. I don’t wear certain styles of sandals as they are a bit mishapen because of this.

3. I lost my virginity to someone who is now very well known but obviously wasn’t then

there’s probably an awful lot more but my brain is blank. Curious to see other peoples - not fishing for secrets, just things that don’t really come up in conversation!

Even my children don't know that I have a cousin who lives in California with his American wife. Mainly because they'd definitely want to go there, and I'd rather stick pins in my eyes😂

I'm bi sexual.
I was almost expelled from school (and would have been had my head of year not adored me).
I was effectively a prostitute in my 3rd year of my 1st degree. High "class" but still prostitution. Left University with no debt and plenty of savings and some very expensive clothes/jewellery but god did I hate myself.

I was trafficked into prostitution
I was an addict
I was homeless.
The second and third were a direct result of the first.
Even my family don't know.

Most people in my life don’t know I was previously married. I’ve not told anyone in my last three jobs. In my friendship circle, not even everyone knows. I just don’t broadcast it tbh. Ex-husband is referred to as ‘my ex’ or ‘DDs dad’.

I speak Russian.

I and some colleagues were taken hostage in a job by a disgruntled client in a job I had when i was 26. It was only for a few hours but was very scary. (I have recurring anxiety and dreams about this - even DH does not know about it).

I did something seriously stupid and dangerous once and nearly died. I cannot even speak of it as it freaks me out because I start dwelling on the possible existence of parallel universes and that maybe in one of them I did die. I have literally never told a soul.

1. Last year I was on a website for about 6 months to sell my underwear to men and made them very explicit videos for money. I have since left but the videos are prob still out there. My OH knew.

1. Everyone thinks I'm happy and says how lucky I am to have my husband but I'm desperately unhappy and I think I'm in an abusive relationship with a man who has had sex with me when I'm sleeping, raped me once in our kitchen, and doesn't let me have access to his money as the main earner.

1. Everytime I look in the mirror I physically recoil and feel sick at how ugly I am and am gutted my looks have gone.

That I sometimes think about kissing etc my male friend. I don't even fancy him altho I do find him very funny I used to and I think it'd as much about what if and fantasy away from the slog of a marriage and numerous kids. I wouldn't if he ever tried it and he wouldn't try.

How much of my day is wasted by lassitude.

That my Dad isn't the decent person everyone thinks he is and as an adult I've realised my childhood is a lie.

That I come from a properly impoverished & dysfunctional background & had a very messed up childhood. I went to a posh university & have a very 'respectable' middle class life outwardly now. I'm pretty open about it all when appropriate and it definitely surprises people.

Also a lighter one...

I read fanfic to relax & love a good trashy ship

I have days when I struggle and often spend Saturdays in bed.

I dream of moving away and starting a new life away from stress.

Most people annoy me.

It sounds like you need to get some help and get away from this man

@IHeartGeneHunt
I am so sorry that is horrific, and what an awful thing to carry about. I hope you are happier now.

@ELL2478 much, much happier! Thank you. Life is what I used to dream about now!

@daydreamer923
Thank you. I am working on it, it's just impossible at the moment.

That I used to be thin and fashionable. I still have some expensive accessories that I kept.

That I’m really lonely.

That I moved to a city I don’t really like for a career that I like even less.

That everyday is a struggle.

I was bullied at school by other children and abused by teachers. I told my parents but nothing stopped.

The experience left me so traumatised that it’s impacted my life, my relationship with my parents and my ability to function as a human.

I ruled out ever having children because I didn’t think I could go through the school years with them. I’m at an age now where I’d be unable to have children and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Maybe my abusers robbed me of having my own family? Or maybe it was never for me anyway?

My main abuser is dead now. But I regret not reaching out before they died to tell them and their family what they did to me. I used to think rising above it was the way forward but I’m still hear dealing with the consequences. And they and their family got off scot free. Maybe I should have lashed out and exposed them.

I hope there was no trafficking going on? I never knew until recently just how seedy and how they grooms very young girls for this. Sad

I have sensory issues but manage to keep it under wraps but makes me burn out.
I haven't got much else.

I am utterly miserable and 2 of my 3 children smoke weed regularly and I detest it. It has ruined our relationship beyond repair.

I had an abortion nobody knows about
I have a hidden physical disability that affects my life that my friends husband and kids don't know about. I feel inferior to others as I can't do everything they can. I feel sad every day.

I was unfaithful to my 2nd boyfriend. No one knows. Biggest regret - never repeated.

I'm incredibly impatient and short tempered. Only DP sees this side of me.

I have disgusting personal habits

I can only appear to organism with a vibrator if I stick my tongue out (I must look like a right idiot)

I also was once with two women (when I was 16)

That I wish I had the balls to be myself and regret not doing so (i like women, im also a woman)

That I'm actually unhappy-happy but fear the unknown, so i keep everything together for everyone else's sake and probably will forever

Well, some of these are interesting

Mine are :

I slept with my teacher during high school

I often think I should have been a page 3 girl, would have made far more money doing that.

My brother has a child he never sees. SIL has no Idea

Most people don't realise how badly I suffer from anxiety or the depth or breadth of the imposter syndrome that colors every work or social situation I find myself in.

Tiring to try and hide it though , and I expect I often look tired now ...