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Original poster

Why don't you drink?!

103 replies

PontypandyPioneer · 16/03/2023 16:48

What do you say if someone asks why don't you drink alcohol?

There's no particular reason I don't drink, I don't want a hangover (have two young sons), the cost of getting a taxi to and from home and I never sleep well after a drink. So I'm usually at a loss at what to say other than I just don't want it, but it seems this isn't a good enough answer for most people! My husband doesn't drink either so it's not like it's because I'd have to drive.

I'm usually hit with a puzzled look and people saying "can I not even tempt you with one?"

Sometimes I feel like saying back "why do you drink alcohol?" but feel like I'd come across rude and defensive haha.

Any good responses?

Btw, I used to drink when I was younger and it just got less and less over the years until now I just never fancy one.

OP posts:
coffeeschmoffee · 16/03/2023 20:54

I just say "for health reasons"

Really I hate the smell, the taste and it makes me feel sick and awkward. Plus I don't want the calories (would sooner have a slice of cake)

CherryRipe1 · 16/03/2023 20:58

Because I will either be off my face and spaced out, in a coma or dead. The medications I'm on do not mix with alcohol.

coodawoodashooda · 16/03/2023 21:01

I don't have time

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sharond101 · 16/03/2023 21:04

I don't drink alcohol. I am a control freak and don't like to think I loose my inhibitions and control over a situation. I don't like the taste, I can taste it 3 days later and I want to enjoy my family rather than live life with hangovers.

elp30 · 16/03/2023 21:37

I loved drinking wine and worked for a winery for a few years. I know my stuff!

I quit my wine job a few years ago and drinking completely, 19 months ago.

The reason is that I was starting to use alcohol to mask emotions. I was going through some hard times and I was using it to cope. I lost my very close friend of 35 years to alcoholism yet I grieved for him by drinking more. One sober day, they were becoming few and far between, I realized I couldn't do it anymore because it was evident how much my life was revolving around it in my actions, conversations, thoughts. I needed it to end.

I just tell people a simple, I look them straight in the eye and say, "I just don't want to."
My matter-of-fact answer simply shuts them up.

Sumlove · 16/03/2023 21:42

I have zero interest. Have the odd one occasionally. I avoid some events as people don't like you not drinking. Was at an event recently and friend's husband kept pestering and pestering me to have one. I pretended to have one in the end, as it was getting really embarrassing.
Such a weird thing to do to people. I have a good time, dance and enjoy myself without drinking. So I don't see the point, people are obsessed with alcohol. Imagine if people were trying to force cocaine on you???!!!!

doglikescheeseontoast · 16/03/2023 21:49

When I was in rehab for alcohol addiction I prepared 2 responses for when/if I was ever asked why I don't drink.

I have never had to use either of them - I don't think most people really notice or care if you order a soft drink.

smileladiesplease · 16/03/2023 23:11

I love wine as does dh.

I couldn't give a shiny shite if others don't. Why would you? Wierd. Never really heard anyone pressuring others to drink. Maybe you need to change your friends or educate them. Drinking/not drinking is totally normal. Boring to even mention it

MudLady · 16/03/2023 23:24

My dad is an alcoholic, & suffered migraines for decades. He nearly died of a stroke which we assumed was yet another hangover/migraine. I found him, it wasn’t pleasant. (Alcohol is a common trigger.) I have migraines too… hence, I don’t drink. I don’t want brain damage like him.

sometimes I have a teaspoonful (literally) of amaretto or something in hot chocolate. That’s about my limit.

Anyone who pushes me with uncomfortable questions gets an uncomfortable answer. TBH people usually get pretty uncomfortable & back off without me even mentioning the bit about the stroke…

Mysterian · 16/03/2023 23:27
  1. I don't like the taste.
  2. It's expensive.
  3. I didn't know Mumsnet has this automatic numbering feature.
  4. I like knowing I'm always able to drive.
  5. People seem to behave like arseholes when they've had a drink. They say they don't, but basically anybody who've had more than a glass are twats.
  6. I tried once and had a hangover. Never again.
  7. I like being in control of what I say.
TonTonMacoute · 16/03/2023 23:36

I love wine, and drink it several evenings a week. I enjoy choosing my wine to match the food.

However, so many people these days don't drink, for many good reasons most of which have been quoted here, I'm surprised that people still question it.

If I'm entertaining I always make sure there's an interesting range of non-alcoholic drinks, and would never dream of questioning why someone didn't want alcohol. It's as bad as asking why someone doesn't have children!

Gingernaut · 16/03/2023 23:38

I never acquired a taste, it affects me badly, it interferes with my meds.

EveSix · 16/03/2023 23:43

Because I love my lucidity and unfuzzy thinking and cognitive capacity; alcohol makes me sleepy and dull. Apart from for about 4 minutes when I become an intrusive flirt, which is gross.

ThirdOne · 16/03/2023 23:46

AlannaOfTrebond · 16/03/2023 17:58

I've got two main answers, both of which are true.

I did a one year no drinking challenge and felt so much better in so many ways I decided to just carry on.

I think I've already drunk my quota for my whole life.

These are literally the two same responses I give Smile (and they are also true!)

Borborygmus · 16/03/2023 23:47

I can't think of any reasons to drink. I hate the taste, the way it makes you feel, and it's obviously not good for your health. Plus people who have been drinking tend to be much worse company than those who haven't.

AnnieSnap · 16/03/2023 23:58

I just say “I don’t drink”. I don’t think anyone has ever asked me why, but I’ve had questions like “what, not at all”? With an astounded expression. I do have a glass of something very occasionally (maybe a cocktail a few times a year), but generally, I’m just not that interested. Another thing that no doubt influences me, is that my husband is an alcoholic. He has now been sober for 4-years. He assures me that it doesn’t /wouldn’t bother him if I had a drink (or more), but I wouldn’t feel comfortable drinking with him. I’m not a big fan of alcohol because we have such a heavy drinking culture in the UK and in my work, as well as my personal life, I have seen it do such awful damage.

Thirdsummerofourdiscontent · 17/03/2023 00:33

I usually say I can’t drink as I just can’t sleep after any amount and would be awake all night. Which is true. Must be a age thing for me - that or it’s the fact that as a former functioning alcoholic I have trained myself to not sleep when drinking so I can drink my way into breakfast.

Pinacalola · 17/03/2023 06:35

I say it doesn't work for me, I don't like the feeling (true it gives me horrible anxiety) or I'm on medication. Nobody asks about the medication thing eg. What medication it is or what it's for.

IMarchToADifferentDrummer · 17/03/2023 07:03

I do drink alcohol, but sometimes I just fancy a lemonade or something.
It's your choice, just as it is theirs to drink!
Just tell people who ask that that's what you're happy with and that forcing you to drink will end your friendship - a real friend won't make you feel bad about not drinking!!

EraOfTheGrey · 17/03/2023 09:15

I just don't. The end.

Raffington55 · 17/03/2023 09:24

PontypandyPioneer · 16/03/2023 16:48

What do you say if someone asks why don't you drink alcohol?

There's no particular reason I don't drink, I don't want a hangover (have two young sons), the cost of getting a taxi to and from home and I never sleep well after a drink. So I'm usually at a loss at what to say other than I just don't want it, but it seems this isn't a good enough answer for most people! My husband doesn't drink either so it's not like it's because I'd have to drive.

I'm usually hit with a puzzled look and people saying "can I not even tempt you with one?"

Sometimes I feel like saying back "why do you drink alcohol?" but feel like I'd come across rude and defensive haha.

Any good responses?

Btw, I used to drink when I was younger and it just got less and less over the years until now I just never fancy one.

In my experience it's generally people who drink too much who are a little threatened by those who don't.

Seeingadistance · 17/03/2023 09:30

Yetanothernamechangeagain · 16/03/2023 17:50

I love the idea upthread of saying it’s because I’m pregnant. I’m 47 now and this will just amuse me more and more the older I get.

Ha! I’m 55 and was thinking the same!

TheOGCCL · 17/03/2023 09:36

Jesus are we still having to deal with this rubbish.

I’ve been teetotal all my life and have no idea why people are so interested. It’s just such dodgy ground as you have no idea why someone might not be drinking. And it just says a lot more about the person asking than it does about you.

But over the last ten years or so, I’ve noticed it far less and found many more people not drinking.

I don’t like it. People suggest drinks more likely to mask the taste 💁and I say I can always taste the alcohol and that I don’t like perfume either, it’s the bitter ethanol. That tends to end the conversation.

poppym12 · 17/03/2023 09:40

'because I don't want to'.

DemBonesDemBones · 17/03/2023 10:00

It just never occurs to me to have an alcoholic drink. I have lots of friends and family that drink some kind of alcohol every night.