Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Poorly toddler - mum's got to stay at home

59 replies

poorlychild · 08/03/2023 18:28

My 2.5 year old has chicken pox and will need to be off nursery until she's better. We have no support, no grandparents or family. Husband works for a company in an office and earns double my salary. I run my own business and earn half his salary. So naturally I am now looking at at least 5 days stuck in the house with sick toddlerSad Toddler doesn't appear that unwell yet but I know she might soon become itchy and uncomfortable. She's normally a very lively child and quite hard work / requires a lot of attention. Definitely not the sort of child who would sit and watch CBeebies whilst I did some work. I won't be able to complete any tasks at all including many housework tasks for the next week. Meanwhile husbands life looks basically the same, and he's got a busy few days so won't be coming back till after DD's bedtime.

I've moved meetings and done what I can but there'll be s lot of catching up. Annoyingly I gave a teaching commitment on Saturday so whilst DH will look after DD I can't very well suggest I get some time off at the weekend.

I know it's just par for the course that as parents our child will get sick and we will have to take time off work.

Just looking for any tips to help me get through the next few days without going stir crazy or overly stressed about my work.

OP posts:
PragmaticWench · 09/03/2023 13:31

These are the men who, years down the line, decide to stiff women over divorce settlements and child maintenance as 'why should she get MY money and pension when she didn't work harder at her career'. Neatly forgetting how they marked out their 'important big job' as they were earning more, and pushed their wives/partners into being the default parent because they earned less. All under the veneer of bring a loving husbsnd/partner.

EL8888 · 09/03/2023 13:33

PragmaticWench · 09/03/2023 13:31

These are the men who, years down the line, decide to stiff women over divorce settlements and child maintenance as 'why should she get MY money and pension when she didn't work harder at her career'. Neatly forgetting how they marked out their 'important big job' as they were earning more, and pushed their wives/partners into being the default parent because they earned less. All under the veneer of bring a loving husbsnd/partner.

This. All of the sick days, pick ups / drop offs completely forgotten. Plenty of self righteous rage about “her trying to take MY money”

Newgirls · 09/03/2023 13:49

Op you are in the thick of it but maybe suggest you both set aside an hour at the weekend to discuss.

if he has traditional parents mum at home type thing he will be used to that model.

stay calm and you can always suggest marriage therapy. That can be an eye opener for men to think ‘oh shit she’s serious’

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

2 year olds Families
Jules912 · 09/03/2023 14:00

I was buying the it just happed to be an unusually busy/important two weeks for him as my DH has times like that (somehow DC always get ill when he's out the country), but from the updates it doesn't sound like it.
I do cover most illnesses but my children are school age and I work part time, so when they're only sick for a day or two it makes sense as I can shuffle days around and no one loses annual leave. DH will take a day or two for anything longer if not one of the above - we shared it when DS had chicken pox. When DD had it (not at the same time) I did do it all, but only because it was school holidays and I already had the leave booked.

Original poster
poorlychild · 09/03/2023 14:11

Actually I have suggested marriage counselling. I really feel stuck and sad about this. Things have changed so much since having DC and I think we've both struggled to adjust, but the difference is that I've had to (literally every aspect of my life, work, time, well-being, physical body has changed) whereas for DH his work and day/to-day weekday life is unchanged, except there's a child at home and his wife has less capacity to support him with his work stress when he gets home in the evening.

OP posts:
Newgirls · 09/03/2023 18:23

You are not alone in this op - have the talk and good luck

Kfjsjdbd · 09/03/2023 18:24

I know this isn’t helpful to your situation now, but if you have that lack of support and no paid leave then why didn’t you vaccinate her against chicken pox? It also would have saved her the pain.

badg3r · 09/03/2023 19:29

How would your husband's boss feel it a female colleague needed time off for a sick kid?

Original poster
poorlychild · 10/03/2023 11:27

Kfjsjdbd · 09/03/2023 18:24

I know this isn’t helpful to your situation now, but if you have that lack of support and no paid leave then why didn’t you vaccinate her against chicken pox? It also would have saved her the pain.

I didn't know it was possible to vaccinate.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread