Does anyone else mental health issues are thrown around too much?

[Justwingingit2005]

A friend of mine offered to book a table for a get together. It's this Friday and had assured us it was booked in the group chat. Tonight its come to light she didn't book it and when questioned why did she lie as someone would have booked it said 'my mental health is suffering'. I know appearances are often put on, but we've known her 20 years. When she forgets its always mental health.
Also people commenting on cleaning saying they are 'a bit ocd'.
I feel these are downgrading just how hard mental health is. Ocd can be crippling, and these terms shouldn't be thrown around.

Anxiety is mostly a very normal response to a situation where you're out of your comfort zone. And being out of your comfort zone is a good thing! It helps you learn and develop in your chosen walk of life. Facing into and overcoming a situation you're anxious about is a really positive move. Too often people back down from it and the anxiety becomes self-perpetuating.

Can I also say I feel there’s an element of emotional blackmail to it now. ‘Let me talk to you about my mental health as much as I like, and you must unquestioningly support it, otherwise you could push me to suicide.’

If you hop over to FWR it’s the tactics also used by gender charities like Mermaids 🤷🏼‍♀️

Well put.

So what you're saying is, "how you feel and are affected doesn't matter, you need to fall in line with what I want to do, and if you don't tough, oh and #bekind, but that only counts when I'm telling people to be kind to me"? 🤔

The days when some people got to dictate what others get to talk about are over.

If the conversation around you bores you, that is your problem. Stay home in your own house is my advice to you.

I see this thread as supporting you and others with diagnosed MH conditions. It is calling out the charlatans and self obsessed who are diluting the truth about your life and struggle.

Having been diagnosed with depression in the past, but thankfully in recovery for many years, I empathise with you completely @Somebodiesmother

I explained upthread I do not have a MH issue myself, and I don't ask people to be kind to me.

This thread is full of cunts saying 'I don't want to listen to other people speaking as they wish'.

If you don't want to listen, remove yourself. You don't have the right to shut a person down because you don't want to hear it. Same goes for me.

This thread is on no way supportive. This is a thread full of cunts belittling other people's mental health issues and acting as the judge of what is a 'real' mental health issue and what is not.

Yeah it's utterly shit

My sister's husband has OCD. At one point their boiler had broken down so a few days later they had it repaired. Fine, all done..... you would think.
Nope. He was forced by his OCD to stay awake all night for months, going downstairs over 30 times a night to check it was working. My sister got little sleep thanks to his constant laying awake, worrying about the perfectly working boiler and heading downstairs to check it.
And that's just one issue he was dealing with. It only stopped when they bought a brand new built house and moved in. My sister worked 60+ hours a week whilst dealing with that too.

My sister is now on anti-depressants.

So f**k my MIL for saying "Oh I'm totally OCD!" Because she wipes down her kitchen counter top after she's made a cuppa. I've explained so many times that it's not OCD at all. She just likes it clean. Just like I like to park my car facing up my street instead of down. Or how I hate the kids shoes being left on the floor beside the shoe cabinet instead of inside. It's called being tidy. Or having preferences. I hate people pulling out the MH card to explain wants and desires, or getting you out of responsibilities or letting mistakes slide. It cheapens real MH issues.

Saying "I'm sorry, I suffer with X and sometimes I'm not very good at controlling my emotions but I'm truly sorry for my behaviour and acknowledge it was awful" is SO different to saying "I can't help it, I have X, that's why I reacted to you like that" and expecting people to suck it up and make allowances for you despite no acknowledgment of how you affected them.

this is probably the best comment on this thread (i know it's frowned on but there's another thread asking if it's right to callout Kanye on his anti-semitism because he has MH issues. My answer: sure, of course you should. And the comment above is a very good example of how he, and others should apologise)

It never ceases to astound me that, as in the OP, there is someone in the group who is clearly struggling but OP complains about them being flaky instead of asking if she's ok, and (or) jumping in, knowing this person struggles, to make the reservation herself.

Am currently reading up on ADHD and how it manifests itself and is diagnosed, and it is certainly an eye opener. Modern life is very stressful in ways we haven't had before. And previously? People with poor mental health were ignored, bullied, told to snap out of it, resorted to Mother's Little Helpers, were admitted to psych wards and often killed themselves. Or lived lives of quiet misery.

Poor as resources are I for one am glad that we are making progress.
Am not as impressed with people who use MH issues as excuses for being awful or lazy.

Is there a post where someone has actually said 'never ever ever talk about it'?
It's this black and white level that I think some people are finding frustrating.

I should shut myself in my house so as to not be endlessly lectured about other people’s mental health? Yeah that’s a recipe for good mental health that. I can’t stop people from doing it but I can tell them they’re boring me and lowering my mood.

No I’m saying it should be discussed to an appropriate degree, because this obsession with introspection and talking about feelings is actually having the reverse effect.

Exactly! ‘Either you listen and affirm unquestioningly or you’re to blame for people committing suicide’

Where else to we hear that? 🤔

You are an amazing hypocrite.

Why should anyone care for your mental health given you do not care for anyone else's? If staying home does harm your mental health, just be sure not to talk about it as you might bore someone or lower their mood

😆

Am I really, difference is I’m not the one who wants to talk at people so much they want to lock themselves away!

Exactly what about the MH of colleagues picking up after their signed off colleagues? It’s just one big domino effect because some people are quite self absorbed and want to turn their everyday feelings into a ‘condition’.

Actually your first paragraph shows you don't empathise with me at all.

Other peoples struggles dont dilute mine at all. It's threads like these that make people judgemental and disbelieving of me when I talk about my mental health issues.
.

I had this several years ago - treated like shit by someone with mental health problems, blamed me for him getting sectioned and then his friends blamed me when I dared to speak up about his behaviour. It was one of the reasons why I left a group. He then left because people weren't happy with how he was treating them

Meanwhile I was going through my own personal struggles (my grandad was dying) and found it hard given the way he'd treated me, to care.

He never once apologised