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Dress Shopping Frustration.

36 replies

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 17:53

Shopping for a ‘special’ dress used to be straightforward – take a trip to the nearest high street, visit your preferred shops, search through the rails, try on a load and buy the one you like best.

Now though, the high street has all but disappeared and the widest choices are all online.

I’m currently in need of a Mother-of-the-Groom garment (for September) and have looked at so many that I’m in danger of going dress blind.

Here’s my gripe: if you order one dress, wait for it to arrive, try it on, decide it’s doesn’t in fact suit you, return it, wait for your refund, order the next attempt, wait for it to arrive… It takes forever! But if you order a selection at you commit hundreds of pounds at once for the privilege of trying them on at home.

My DH is of the opinion that I shouldn’t order another until I’ve rejected the first. He also can’t understand why I don’t just go to John Lewis and get one. I’ve tried to tell him that even JLP is unlikely to have all the ones I’ve seen online, in my size. (And changing rooms when you are 62 and round are not fun.)

Not after any suggestions for a suitable dress – just wanted to rant quietly!

OP posts:
RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 23/02/2023 18:04

I'm with your DH - go and try loads on in JL.

Poscapen · 23/02/2023 18:09

Klass

BarbaraofSeville · 23/02/2023 18:13

Order a load, pay for them with a credit card and send back the ones you don't want. Unless you do it the day before your bill is made up and are really slow in sending back your returns, you won't have to pay for the returned dresses as the refund will be credited before the bill is due.

I won't apologise for assuming that someone who shops in John Lewis can get a credit card.

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Bluevelvetsofa · 23/02/2023 18:13

I feel your pain! Do you want a proper MoG outfit, or a lovely outfit that isn’t shouting wedding?

I got my MoG outfit from Jacques Vert, but they don’t have a high street presence any more. You can still get JV stuff online though.

Phase 8 any good, or Reiss? They might have those in JL.

BarbaraofSeville · 23/02/2023 18:16

Or go to JL and book a personal shopping appointment. Tell them you want to buy a dress for your DSs wedding, can spend up to £X and pick from whatever they suggest.

You don't have to choose from all the dresses in existence, surely there will be at least one that is suitable amongst the dozens/hundreds that they do have in store?

GoodChat · 23/02/2023 18:16

I think he's right. Go to your local city, have a day out.

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 18:18

@Bluevelvetsofa - not sure what a proper MoG outfit is! I don't suit the shift dress and jacket combo. I've looked at Jaques Vert but not my style. Have ordered (today and yesterday) two from Phase Eight.

@BarbaraofSeville - credit card currently quite hot!

OP posts:
rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 18:22

@BarbaraofSeville - a personal shopping appointment is a very good idea!
I've agreed to stop the constant dress-surfing and go proper shopping if the two PH ones are a disappointment.

OP posts:
Anna713 · 23/02/2023 18:22

I agree completely rosegoldwatcher. I am in exactly the same position as you but my son's wedding is in June. I've tried John Lewis but they didn't stock all the Hobbs, Phase Eight and Reiss ranges and not all in my totally average size. It's very frustrating. Ive also bought loads on line. Non suitable so I'm going to let my credit card recover for now and I'll try again in a couple of weeks.

Moltenpink · 23/02/2023 18:25

How about giving Stitchfix a go? You can try on five items without paying, a stylist picks them for you.

Anna713 · 23/02/2023 18:26

Ooh thats a good idea Molten pink. I might try that

Moltenpink · 23/02/2023 18:37

@Anna713 You are welcome to use my referral link, www.stitchfix.co.uk/invite/kfpwsq29c7?sod=m&som=c (£15 off each) although there are other first time offers that might be better. I really love the service, if I’m looking for something in particular I leave a note for the styalist

Yayyayitsaholiholiday · 23/02/2023 18:42

Any dress that you like, meets the formality level (or lack of!), of the day, is a MoG dress!

boboshmobo · 23/02/2023 18:52

Use Klarna and order loads
Or get a next account as they sell pretty much everything and loads of occasion wear

Anna713 · 23/02/2023 19:01

Thanks Moltenpink. I have used stitchfix ages ago but I went off them. I've given it another go though. I've told them what I'm looking for so hopefully they can find me something I've not already seen. You would not believe the amount of dresses I've tried on.

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 19:06

The two that I ordered previously (and returned) were from Phase Eight (Studio) and Baukjen - badly fitting and way too low cut respectively.

According to the adverts popping up on my screen I've also looked at Little Wings Factory, Alie Street London, Reiss, Needle & Thread, Light in the Box, Sezane and red shoes (apparently!)

OP posts:
frozendaisy · 23/02/2023 19:12

If you have a bit of spare cash John Lewis will do a personal shopper for you.

The underwear fitters couldn't be more lovely.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 23/02/2023 19:50

Go to JLP website. Order all the dresses you'd like to try the day after you've paid your credit card bill. Get them delivered to the store. Try on in store. Return the ones you don't want on the spot. No impact in credit card.

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 20:32

@JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn - Get them delivered to the store.

Can that be done? I didn't notice that option - but I wasn't looking for it, I suppose. Brilliant idea if possible!
Could I book a large, private changing room with flattering lighting and convex mirror?

OP posts:
GettingStuffed · 23/02/2023 20:42

What are you supposed to do it you don't have a credit card or a company is charging for returns?

Klarna etc is just a way of running up debt as it's not " real money " .

If your a size 20 or under Monsoon still have a high street presence.

mnahmnah · 23/02/2023 20:49

This is why I have a Next account - order as many as you want online, try them all on at home, retune the ones you don’t like before you are charged anything. They have lots of brands.

gawditswindy · 23/02/2023 21:07

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 20:32

@JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn - Get them delivered to the store.

Can that be done? I didn't notice that option - but I wasn't looking for it, I suppose. Brilliant idea if possible!
Could I book a large, private changing room with flattering lighting and convex mirror?

The JL personal shopper advised me to order a pile of dresses to be delivered to store at the time of my appointment so I could try that stuff at the same time as the stuff they'd picked out. So you'd have the big fitting room and access to accessories, etc.

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 21:20

@GettingStuffed - If your a size 20 or under Monsoon still have a high street presence.

Yes - under a size 20 but not by much.
I like Monsoon - have a few summer maxis from them. I did look online but anything I liked was sold out in my size. Same with Coast.

Karen Millen has some gorgeous mirror printed midi dresses but so spendy!

@mnahmnah - I was a Next 'girl' 20 years ago (my sister worked there) but feel too old for them now.

OP posts:
changedforonenightonly · 23/02/2023 21:25

What are you looking for style wise and what is your body shape

rosegoldwatcher · 23/02/2023 21:40

@changedforonenightonly -
Apple shaped due to menopause/genes/previous daily wine habit.

I'm happiest in maxi or midaxi length. Empire line is flattering for me. Can't wear high necked, back revealing, sleeveless garments. Don't do tailored. Love beading and sparkle. Prefer pastels to brights.

I'm having more trouble than my future, lovely DiL did in finding her wedding gown!

OP posts:
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