Feeling very selfish but sooo gutted about potential childcare reforms

[DownInTheDumpster]

amp.theguardian.com/politics/2023/feb/10/treasury-considering-huge-expansion-free-childcare-england

Obviously these are only just ideas floating around currently and overall it is 100% necessary changes and a brilliant brilliant thing for parents and children and society as a whole.

But god as someone who has paid 60k so far in childcare and is crawling to the end point of child starting school it’s killing me that if we had left it a few years later we might not have had to pay so much. Childcare has crippled us and I’m thrilled it won’t be the same for others in future but it pains me that we will have missed out on this (potentially!).

Anyone want to share in my pain?

@oakleaffy apparently not! I thought it was for some reason. Another poster explains the thresholds further up the thread. Made me feel less awful at least

I agree . Plus changing the ratio seems a bad idea.

There will be nurseries with more children if they extend funding to one year olds but more children per adult. So how exactly will this benefit disadvantaged one year olds if they aren’t getting the support they really need due to ratios etc.

Obviously something needs to change but maybe not childcare . Perhaps addressing horrendously high private rents would be better and free up money for families instead of changing the childcare system.

‘making it easier to register as a childminder’ that also concerns me alongside the ratio change as dropping standards to provide a service isn’t really the way to go

So for a single person, their only child would get how much??

( Assuming I don’t go into a care home)

Well when I had children there was almost no maternity allowance (was self-employed) so I was able to take no maternity leave at all - worked the day I went into hospital and the day I came out of hospital. Luckily gave birth over the weekend. There was also no free childcare at all for either of my children - had to pay throughout. Hope that makes you feel better.

Oh dear! I am a single ( Divorced) person and was delighted to read that-
( DS would not have thousands creamed off )
But the thresholds do need to raise in my opinion.
£350 k is nothing.
40 % tax is brutal

Yes exactly @oakleaffy when my dad died (mum died years before) I was still living at home..I was an adult but young. We had a house in London...of course it was worth more than £250k which was the threshold at the time. So it had to be sold asap. It's a horrible nasty tax...we were hardly wealthy

I think they'll go with reducing quality first, mainly by changing the ratios, in the hope that it opens up more childcare places and reduces costs.

I don't think we'll see an expansion to 30 free hours from 9 months yet, although they may do it from age 2.

I think they'll go with reducing quality first, mainly by changing the ratios

I suspect you are right. Nurseries may well refuse to do this on safety grounds. A lot of nurseries around here have already closed their doors-I can’t imagine this will help.

@Comedycook if you paid hundreds of thousands in IHT you must have inherited a fucking fortune! The money you paid in IHT went to pay for services for those not lucky enough to have that kind of money just dumped in their lap 🙄.

Yes I'm just so lucky that my mother died when I was a child and my father when I was just in my early twenties... lucky lucky me. It's been great living my adulthood with no parents to fall back on if times get tough. And my kids have no grandparents. My inheritance was enough to buy a modest flat. I am not an only child so the money was split. How rude and nasty are you by the way?

I agree with this. My DDs go to a great nursery and I'd hate to see them forced to close for any reason. Any increase in funded hours needs to actually be funded properly, and I won't be holding my breath for that to happen.

But also I see where OP is coming from. Like buying a dress and then seeing it on sale, or (slightly more significantly) fixing your mortgage and then the rates going down. But you can only make decisions based on the information you have at the time, so it's just life.

I felt the same 28 years ago when they finally brought in some free hours. My youngest child got one term of it
I gave up my career because affording childcare was impossible. However I had gone through higher education on a grant. Which was some what wasted considering a few years later childcare costs stopped me climbing the career ladder.
It's all swings and roundabouts.

I'm always amazed by how much parents resent having to pay for their child to be cared for. Why on earth do you think this is someone else's responsibility? Why do you want the people caring for your kid to be underpaid? Was this all a surprise to you when you gave birth?

I don't think anyone resents it. They just can't afford it. Wages are very low in this country. 15 years ago whe my Ds was a baby a nursery cost £50 a day. Nurseries now cost £100 a day in my area of London. The salary of the job I was doing at the time has not doubled.

Can they do this asap coz I’m drowning over here.

I don’t resent paying for it, I just resent how much it takes to raise a child. It’s just not cost efficient to have one salary cover everything these days, I really wish it was. I wish I could be a sahm, I wish I could so much,

I wish I could afford childcare full time instead of the dance I do with arranging informal childcare AS WELL as paid care to make it possible to work.

you sound incredibly misinformed and or judgmental.

@Comedycook that sounds incredibly hard. I am very sorry for your losses

Not true in many cases. Stimulating childcare is a huge advantage for children from disadvantaged homes (and in my opinion most homes advantaged as well.) It also allows their parents to be released from 24/7 childcare to work, be educated or trained or to rest and be better parents and role models.

We are seeing the impact of the lack of this during the pandemic now. Good quality childcare benefits children, parents, communities, social mobility, the economy in many many ways.

Thank you @Motnight

Expected by 2030 ish i reckon

I had to give up work. I’m back at work part time but would LOVE to see for once parents of children with additional needs helped out. My child can’t cope in group child care due to his autism. So I either do a job around school hours forever or I pay for a specialist nanny. Reality is many families end up with a full time carer because it’s so so hard to find suitable childcare that is affordable.

(full time parent carer that should say)

The fact they are doing it by playing with ratios worries me. It's also doesn't say anything about being limited to the number of kids you can have. Would me much better if it's was properly funded possibly for 1st child only or was a student loan style system so you pay for it upfront or you pay it's as a percentage over a longer period.

OP I haven't read the full thread but ever since I heard this news I have been feeling resentful and gutted. I KNOW a big shake up to childcare will benefit millions of children, women, families in the future. It is TOTALLY right that we invest in the youngest members of our society. But fuck me, we could have done with the help too.

My eldest is in reception, my youngest is nearly three so we are almost through the most expensive stage.

My resentment is bound up with the fact that I had a newborn and a two year old in the winter lockdown of 2020/2021, having had a very bad birth. I'm still very angry about being abandoned by society during that time, definitely not over it. Can't afford therapy, because childcare!!!

So, I just wanted to say, I get it OP.

@Cactus2022 I’m so sorry- similar ages to mine and it was sooo tough. Felt completely let down by the government that whole time as a new mum.