I went out tonight. OMG

[Parsnipsandginger]

First time in a pub with a band for around a year, at least.

I got knocked so many times and my drink spilt. I got my foot trodden on. I was squashed. Very crowded. Too busy. Trying to hold drink and handbag & dance at same time was near on impossible.

Never ever again. Trouble is, my friends love it

Anyone else relate?

I can't remember ever really enjoying a night like this even when very young 😂

Our local tiny pub has live music a couple of afternoons/nights a week and you can take your kids to the early sessions and it’s very family friendly although they don’t do food, only on special occasions.

But then I’m in Ireland and this is normal village life.

I’ve never liked overcrowded noisy pubs even when I was young and I don’t drink alcohol either.

Been there done that. Only I remember you'd get fag burns in your dress about five times. I still like a night out but would only go to a place like that if I was already on a real high and really, really in the mood to party. Doesn't happen often. I'm 41. I like being at home. I do blast music at home sometimes and that has the desired effect. What do I want to be around strangers at the same time for?

That's why we day drink. Home by 7. Netflix 😅

I must admit I’ve gone from loving a bustling atmosphere to hating it. Give me table service drinks, some background atmosphere and no queues.

I can only tolerate pubs if they are the 'sit down at a table, enjoy quiet conversation' type of place now. The 'noisy stand-up bar type of place' is hideous IMO....

What do you say to decline? I also hate going out. Since covid, I'm now a home lover and only want to be at home.really not bothered about going out at all. But friends would get peed if I declined everything

Didn't even like them in student days. I was 18 going on 70 😄(no offence intended to 70 year olds who like that sort of evening)

I’m 55 and still love a pub band night. Exactly what we did on NYE.

It sounds like a great night to me. Love live music, love dancing, love the busy atmosphere, love the camaraderie with others. I was out last weekend at a similar pub, got home around 1am, made fish finger sandwiches and watched tv, apologised to the teenager next morning for being loud. I’m grateful for not stinking of stale smoke though.

40 years ago I was a girl about town. Loved nothing better than drinking after work in the West End. Things change and we change. No place I’d rather be now than at home. Lovely

Not my idea of a musical night out, each to their own, nothing wrong with politely declining. Try to think of something you could all enjoy and not so crowded, I think you should go out from time to time.

Last time I went out with friends was in September last year.We went to a nice restaurant and had a nice meal. Then horror of horrors when the consensus was to go and find a nice pub with music to round the evening off .Had to traipse around town looking for one thath would meet our requirements. Found one that wasnt too busy - but it played ridiculously loud music. The dancers among us were loving it but the rest had to sit in relative silence until there was a break in the music.
Whats the point of going out with friends and not speaking to them? Its always baffled me.
Anyway. Im not repeating that experience again. If my friends want to see me they are welcome to come round to mine and we can have a right old chinwag round the table with some home made spag bol and some nice wine - this so inclined can dance in the kitchen. I dont even mind paying for the lot - still much cheaper than going out out.

I do it once a year
Work Christmas do. Got home at 5am on the last one, fell over the cat and brought pizza home with me. Cat was judging me hard
But oh god the hangover. I don't drink except that one night and then consume my entire units for the year
The room was still spinning at lunch time

It does sound too crowded which can often happen, but there are definitely quieter venues and it's not all or nothing. I guess it depends where you live but there is plenty to choose from here. I live in Sheffield, mid forties, and I still love going out in the evening, though can only afford to go / fit it in around the kids once or twice a month. I like going to a meal and a bar, theatres, cinema, or small gigs that are seated. Lively is fine in a bar/restaurant as long as you can sit down and have a conversation. I don't particularly want to go to a quiet restaurant that noone's in, as there's no atmosphere. It is probably harder to find on a Saturday night, though, and my friends and I tend to go out on a Wed/Thurs.

we have turned into afternoon drinkers. Out, drinks, food, laughs, drinks, laughs fun (possibly more food) and home and in PJs for 10.30-11. Good sleep and fresh as a daisy next day.

I used to be the person who’d turn up for the opening of an envelope but those days are so gone now.

I must be the only person who loved the pandemic restrictions being lifted and pubs had table service/apps to order drinks. Since that stopped and we’re back to being elbow deep at the bar I’ve turned into a lunchtime non raver so I can be home in PJ’s by 8pm.

Give me a nice quiet pub where you can sit down in comfort, and while away the afternoon beside a crackling log fire, while digesting the lovely Sunday roast you have just eaten.

I can't be doing with all that crowded noisy jostling nonsense any more. 🙂

Up until last year I was still going out once a month with the girls, a couple of bars then into a club and then I hit 29 and suddenly had no interest in being out until 3am, feet hurting, sweaty from crowds, drinks spilt on me.

I never thought I'd see the day I was ready to give it up and overnight it was like somebody had flicked a switch.

Im 25 weeks pregnant now and love being at home, bubble bath and a nice dinner by 7, pjs on and watching tv with DH.

Im 53 and Iove a night like this, but travel light, credit card and lip balm in pocket or bra , no handbag and no dancing with a drink.

I think I enjoy it more now I'm in my 30s than I did when I was younger, but probably because I only do it a couple of times a year these days instead of every week.

Can you just tell your friends that's not your scene anymore, but also organise other things with them - lunch or something - so they know it's not that you don't want to see them?

God, I’d love to go out again.

Last time I went out to a pub with friends was 2017.

I still have one friend but she keeps going on and on about it all being behind us and wanting to snuggle down at home now.

We are 43 for fucks sake. I want to live, not sit at home drinking tea.

I have a lovely group of friends that meets for a drink a few times a year. I love it. The format is meeting around 7.30, massive gossip and catch up on everyone's lives and people yawning by about 9.30 after two drinks. It's perfect, no one suggests clubbing or going on anywhere else and I am usually in bed with a cuppa by tennish.

Instead of waiting for you friends to arrange the social occasions, and worrying about declining, why not try organise the next one to whatever suits you better?