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Original poster

How to sort a severe dog phobia in autistic child?

42 replies

saltahoy · 11/02/2023 17:59

My 12 yo has pretty significant autism, goes to a SEN school etc. has had a phenomenal dog phobia his entire life.

To be fair to him, over the years he's experienced dogs jumping at him (he will only leave the house for school or to walk in open forestry type areas), barking at him and slobbering/licking him (he has a severe sensory processing disorder so this is torture). We always get the 'don't worry he's friendly' response which I know is people trying to excuse the annoying dog behaviour but ds doesn't understand. He's literally screaming, crying and stimming every time one is jumping or barking at him.

We're getting to the point where he won't leave the house at all. If dogs are on leads, he's fine. There's hardly any places that's open forestry / beach / open space types places where dogs aren't off leads 🤷‍♀️

People always say on here, you need to treat phobias. We need to treat this phobia. How do we do it? He's not under CAMHS now but they wouldn't treat it when we were under them. Who does?

OP posts:
CalistoNoSolo · 11/02/2023 18:09

Get in touch with the local guide dog trainer? They may welcome the chance to get the dog used to a distressed child and the fog will be very calm throughout.

CalistoNoSolo · 11/02/2023 18:09

Dog... not a James Herbert nightmare...

hiredandsqueak · 11/02/2023 18:13

My son was very much similar, he would run into the road if he saw a dog on the same side of the road even on a lead (he still will with pigeons) We got a dog, a small gentle dog and he loves her and she adores him and he is much braver around all dogs now. No need to run anymore because his experience is that dogs are pretty nice really. The dog is the first he says good morning to every day and he always gets a goodnight kiss on the nose before bed

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Dogs SEN
kilos · 11/02/2023 18:29

CalistoNoSolo · 11/02/2023 18:09

Dog... not a James Herbert nightmare...

That fog was for sure not calm.....

RampantIvy · 11/02/2023 18:37

That sounds awful. You must have some dreadful dog owners where you live. We live rurally, and loads of people have dogs round here, but none of them jump up on people, and the owners are pretty careful to make sure that they wouldn't in the first place.

I have no advice, but I hope you find a solution.

Original poster
saltahoy · 11/02/2023 18:49

Egghead68 · 11/02/2023 18:18

Thank you - the problem with all this sort of advice is that it doesn't take into account neurodiversity and disability. He can't comprehend most of this advice. I wonder if National autistic society might have something.....off to google!

OP posts:
Original poster
saltahoy · 11/02/2023 18:50

RampantIvy · 11/02/2023 18:37

That sounds awful. You must have some dreadful dog owners where you live. We live rurally, and loads of people have dogs round here, but none of them jump up on people, and the owners are pretty careful to make sure that they wouldn't in the first place.

I have no advice, but I hope you find a solution.

Tbh we do. It's extremely frustrating the way dogs are round here. Not everyone but every single time we go for a walk there's some incident with an off lead dog. It just confirms all his fears.

OP posts:
Undisclosedlocation · 11/02/2023 18:58

www.facebook.com/groups/311236165581940/?locale=en_GB

these people have a very good reputation locally. Perhaps a similar group exists near you?

SusanPerbCallMeSue · 11/02/2023 18:58

My son used to be the same - he is autistic and has learning disabilities. Bloody dog owners saying it's ok, their dog is friendly while he's screaming and trying to run away. No amount of telling him it's best to stand and ignore the dog would help, he didn't understand and in the moment was far too scared.

He also was afraid of other animals, cats, birds etc, but not to the same extent as obviously they don't tend to approach us like dogs do.

I don't know what happened, he just seemed to grow out of it around 14 . We did a sponsored walk and there were a few dogs, very well behaved. And one walked behind him and I think as it was just walking and not trying to jump up or approach him he managed to keep calm and saw that they weren't really scary.

He's ok seeing them now, he's not keen on petting them. The sudden movements make him nervy and he'll jump away from them. But that's a lot better than screaming and running at the sight of them.

Sorry there's not much advice, but maybe some hope he may gradually see they're not all scary.

TiaI · 11/02/2023 19:06

I have experience of autistic children being desensitised over a number of years. Start with a very old very calm Labrador being some distance away, then over months move same dog slightly closer. Coincide with a treat of some sort (lolly for your child) or some other distraction (park) so the dog is not the focus. Small steps

Rollingdownland · 11/02/2023 20:05

We were in the same boat and got a puppy and it changed everything. DM me for more info but we cannot believe the changes.

SpaceshiptoMars · 11/02/2023 21:11

Teach him to turn his back to the dogs. They lose interest in you immediately. I had an ex police dog go for my throat when I was young, and learnt to do this to cope afterwards.

Thepurplelantern · 11/02/2023 21:22

I’ve had 2 kids with serious dog phobias 1 of them with ASD. Exposure to dogs sorted it. Decent well behaved dogs. We have a dog for our son with ASD now. They are the best of friends.

Original poster
saltahoy · 11/02/2023 21:53

We have a relative with a very calm non barky dog and it hasn't changed anything. She's been in our lives for years and we've all given up trying to expose him to her as if anything, it's making the situation worse. The other tricky thing is even if 1 dog behaves well around him, the next one probably won't - you can't get away from barking jumpy dogs so there's no consistency or carry over.

We won't be getting a dog ourselves. The rest of the family here aren't scared of them but we are all bloody sick of them and the impact they have.

OP posts:
Original poster
saltahoy · 11/02/2023 21:54

SpaceshiptoMars · 11/02/2023 21:11

Teach him to turn his back to the dogs. They lose interest in you immediately. I had an ex police dog go for my throat when I was young, and learnt to do this to cope afterwards.

This just isn't something he can do. If I tried to get him to do that, he's usually so dysregulated he'd lash out.

OP posts:
Original poster
saltahoy · 11/02/2023 21:55

SusanPerbCallMeSue · 11/02/2023 18:58

My son used to be the same - he is autistic and has learning disabilities. Bloody dog owners saying it's ok, their dog is friendly while he's screaming and trying to run away. No amount of telling him it's best to stand and ignore the dog would help, he didn't understand and in the moment was far too scared.

He also was afraid of other animals, cats, birds etc, but not to the same extent as obviously they don't tend to approach us like dogs do.

I don't know what happened, he just seemed to grow out of it around 14 . We did a sponsored walk and there were a few dogs, very well behaved. And one walked behind him and I think as it was just walking and not trying to jump up or approach him he managed to keep calm and saw that they weren't really scary.

He's ok seeing them now, he's not keen on petting them. The sudden movements make him nervy and he'll jump away from them. But that's a lot better than screaming and running at the sight of them.

Sorry there's not much advice, but maybe some hope he may gradually see they're not all scary.

🤞🤞for growing out of it!!

OP posts:
Scottishskifun · 11/02/2023 22:12

I know you have said you have a friend with a non barky dog but have you ever had the dog stay a few days with their owner?

I know this sounds bonkers but my friends DS is severely autistic and had the same for dogs. My dog is incredibly lazy, gentle and placid indoors (shes a greyhound). It took a day of us staying and reassurance from his mum but my dog doesn't react to anything in a house. We stayed for 4 days by day 2 he was coming into the room by day 3 he asked to walk her (we made sure she had a run beforehand so was tired out). It definitely helped but he needed time and space to come to his own understanding and a bit of reassurance.

Lavender14 · 11/02/2023 22:19

Without knowing your son its a little difficult to advise but you could look into therapy dogs and trainers? The dog would be much calmer than your average dog and used to a variety of reactions and the trainer might be able to explain dog behaviour?? I used to be terrified of dogs until we got a puppy and for me when I understood their behaviour then they got much more predictable and that was the end of the fear for me. If you have a local autism initiative or other group nearby you could maybe ask if they've had any therapy dogs in before? Maybe watching some programmes about how service dogs can help their owners so he can see dogs helping and caring for people? Or search and rescue or sheepdogs doing their work. It's a difficult fear to have because dogs are everywhere.

Choconuttolata · 11/02/2023 23:04

We desensitized DS by getting him to meet a friend's very chilled out Collie dog. Friend also has an autistic child so understood. We did lots of small visits building up. At first they were not in the same room, then dog would sit on their chair and DS would sit on another chair in the room. Slowly DS would get closer and then would leave the dog a treat on the chair. It progressed to stroking the dog. Contact was on DS terms totally. He initiated it all. This was over a six month period.

Then we got a puppy, since we had our Boxer puppy he has gradually lost his fear. I think because she was so small at first he wasn't intimidated by her. She is big now and is very tolerant of his behaviour and his squeezy cuddles. The other day he walked up to a Great Dane owner and asked if he could stroke his dog. It has been a massive change, before we started the meetings with my friends dog he ran into the road terrified because a dog ran up to him and nearly got hit by a car. That pushed us to try and help him with his fear.

I would see if you have a therapy dog charity charity nearby that may have a dog that would be suitable for safe contact where your DS could build up positive experiences with a dog. A smaller calm dog that is less intimidating might be best.

Starlightstarbright1 · 11/02/2023 23:16

My Ds has a dog phobia. He had cbt through camhs.

It was before Asd and Adhd diagnosis.

He has improved with the Cbt but not cured it.

Ireadthenewstodayohboy · 11/02/2023 23:18

My autistic DS is exactly the same. We have family members with friendly, non-jumpy dogs that he sees regularly, but still doesn't like them. He will tolerate being in the room with them if they're asleep on the floor and he is out of the way on the sofa, but wont walk past them, and shrieks if they come over to sniff him. And is still utterly terrified of unfamiliar dogs. So I'm not convinced that desensitisation works completely...

I have had to pick him up when we've been out on walks and someone comes past with a dog, and he's 9 so not light!

And dog owners stare and roll their eyes at his obvious distress 😡

HoppingPavlova · 11/02/2023 23:21

Hate to say but mine with ASD never grew out of it, still petrified as an adult. All their NT she blunts are absolutely fine around dogs.

bozzabollix · 12/02/2023 16:01

I have three dogs, the older two are absolutely laid back and lovely. The youngest is only a puppy so currently in a toddler phase, but she will be the same. There’s only been one phobic child they haven’t converted to wanting a dog, who’s now being assessed for ASD but was bought a dog and is now cured.

I’m wondering about training my middle dog to be a therapy dog. That’s maybe where you should start, as the training and assessment means they’ll be the perfect candidates for desensitisation.

It’s a real shame as dogs are so brilliant in helping neurodiverse kids, it’d be good to conquer the fear and reap the benefits.

HoppingPavlova · 12/02/2023 20:14
  • should have been siblings. No idea what a she blunt is, but do get frustrated by an autocorrect that thinks it’s so smart……
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