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Original poster

Official Sixth Form rejection email. Knew it was coming, but still :(

97 replies

GCSEstress · 30/01/2023 10:29

Hi,

So DD got her mock results a while a go and only had 4 5's or above and needed at least 5. She did get a couple of 6's and overall, I was very proud of her and she worked so hard, so it's really going to be a real kick in the teeth when she sees this rejection in writing later, although we knew the criteria, so was obviously expected.

She's not actually expected to pass Maths and this is by far her weakest subject and she needs to pass this. It honestly makes me so cross that this could hold her back from going far in the subjects she is naturally good at, such as English and Art. Seems so unfair and nonsensical!

Trying not to be too negative, as she does only need 1 more 5 as it stands, but that still won't guarantee her a place.

We've obviously looked at other sixth forms and colleges, but they either have tougher entry requirements or the courses (not A level) are just not what DD is interested in.

How can I best support DD through this? She's likely on the autistic spectrum and struggles to build new friendships, so staying at her current school is definitely her preference, but also just for general familiarity, not just friendships.

Be great to hear from those of you with experience of this.

Thanks 😊

OP posts:

Original poster

GCSEstress · 30/01/2023 20:01

Thank you @flummocksed

OP posts:

Original poster

GCSEstress · 31/01/2023 08:55

DD has gone in really upset today. I thought she was actually OK, but even though she knew the criteria, I think it's just ramped up the pressure and she was already really feeling it.

She just says it's too much ☹️ I'm honestly quite cross with the school for doing this. Why do they have to make it so official? It seems so cruelly pointless, when it's only really their final grades that determine the decision.

OP posts:

SalaDaeng · 31/01/2023 08:59

Do BTechs still exist? A friend's DC only got 5 GCSEs in total and not good grades. Was extremely good at art and got an offer to do Btech at local college and has done very well. That was a few years ago though.

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LilLilLi · 31/01/2023 09:02

If maths is her weak point is a tutor an option?

Can you do lots of past papers as part of her revision? They’re so effective and may also help with the time management aspect.

She could go straight to the higher mark questions and leave the one mark questions for last possibly?

Maths Genie has lots of past papers and the marking schemes that you can print off for all exam boards.

Baldrickhasaplan · 31/01/2023 09:04

Both my kids went to college. The eldest because he didn’t get the grades for 6th form, the youngest because she saw how much better her brother’s college experience was.

She did BTEC because she couldn’t cope with exam pressure. BTEC was brilliant for her and she got into her first choice, top rated uni.

User76765 · 31/01/2023 09:09

I know the kids take the mickey out of btecs but my friend's son left sixth form to do a btec and now has five offers from russell group universities. He's had a much easier route to university and at the end of the day that's all that matters if you're going to continue in education.

Clymene · 31/01/2023 09:10

I really would take @flummocksed advice - I'm pretty sure she's right and they're not allowed to do this.

I'm in a similar situation - DS didn't get the grades at mocks to stay on for A levels at his current school but if he gets them in the actual exams, he's guaranteed a place.

ChicCroissant · 31/01/2023 09:12

Sorry to hear that your DD is upset this morning OP. I'm not surprised she is feeling the pressure because at school, everything seems to funnel down to the exams. My DD has an intervention at tutor time today, a different subject intervention at lunchtime AND an extra lesson after school. I think it's a bit much for them.

Hopefully when things have calmed down then she can consider her options outside of the school, but I completely understand that's not what she wants really.

And for anyone who hasn't read the thread - she already has a maths tutor.

MrsAvocet · 31/01/2023 09:18

Oh dear, I'm sorty to hear she is so upset OP. Is there a supportive teacher she could talk to today?
It does sound as if it could have been handled better, but to give the school the benefit of the doubt there is probably an element of them wanting pupils to have workable alternative plans in place rather thsn getting a shock on results day and being left scrambling for last minute places elsewhere. Which is exactly what happened to the son of a friend of mine a few years ago. Similar circumstances actually. He wanted to do history and similar subjects for A level and actually got really good grades in those subjects, but failed maths. That wasn't a surprise but his parents had got the impression from the school that there would be some way round this but on results day they learned that there wasn't. So instead of being able to celebrate the good grades he did get, it was panic stations ringing round looking for somewhere that would take him, and to be honest, whilst he has done ok subsequently, things could probably have been better with more planning.
I know it's a horrible and stressful time, but at least your school is being upfront and it does give you time to look into alternatives in a more timely way. Easier said than done I know, but try to get DD to see it as an opportunity to consider different ideas and plan ahead. I hope things look up for her soon (and you, as parents suffer through these things too.)

User76765 · 31/01/2023 09:23

GCSEstress · 31/01/2023 08:55

DD has gone in really upset today. I thought she was actually OK, but even though she knew the criteria, I think it's just ramped up the pressure and she was already really feeling it.

The thing is that it seems harsh but you really need to know now (three months ago!!) if they think she won't get the grades since you need the time to make other arrangements.

We have the same with one of ours. He missed the 6.5 average he needs to stay on but we didn't get the mock grades until a few weeks ago. Too late to apply to our preferred alternative which closed their applications for 2023 sixth form back in early November. Fortunately I think its given him a kick and he seems to be a bit more focussed so hopefully he can pull the grades up.

x2boys · 31/01/2023 09:34

User76765 · 31/01/2023 09:09

Do they ?
Many kids are not academic enough for Alevels Btech,s are a decent alternative ,I'm nearly 50 and had to.Resit some GCSE,s ( when GCSE,s were very new ) I ended uo.with seven grade.C,s my mum.really pushed me to.then take Alevels ,,and I just about scraped on the course ,inevitably I did badly and it was a waste of two ,years I feel.I would have done much better if I had done a Btech instead .

User76765 · 31/01/2023 09:49

x2boys · 31/01/2023 09:34

Show quote history

Unfortunately around here if something is knockoff or second rate it is called "Btec" by the teens. eg local high street fried chicken would be called "Btec KFC"

Clymene · 31/01/2023 10:03

I'm sorry you live in such a horrible area @User76765

TheaBrandt · 31/01/2023 10:36

Sounds a horrible place to live. Doesn’t happen round here nothing wrong with not going the academic route.

My Dd got 8s/9s and is academic and driven and she is finding A levels challenging. It would be bloody miserable for a non academic student so don’t think the school are at fault.

User76765 · 31/01/2023 10:39

Clymene · 31/01/2023 10:03

I'm sorry you live in such a horrible area @User76765

It really isn't a horrible area, in fact it a fairly nice area. It's very common terminology on the internet apparently, not confined to the area at all.

I told DS2 off for saying it and he hadn't even really made the link. He just said it meant rubbish.

Comefromaway · 31/01/2023 10:57

I've never heard it and I have teens. Round here Btec is often seen as a really good, popular, vocational option.

ScentOfSawdust · 31/01/2023 12:19

There is too often an assumption (one I’m ashamed I’d made, before I looked into it more closely) that BTECs and FE college are for people who aren’t bright/motivated enough for A levels at sixth form.

Nothing could be further from the truth. A level three extended diploma is the equivalent of 3 A levels. Vocational doesn’t mean easier and the main difference is that they are assessed in a much more realistic way.

x2boys · 31/01/2023 13:00

User76765 · 31/01/2023 10:39

It really isn't a horrible area, in fact it a fairly nice area. It's very common terminology on the internet apparently, not confined to the area at all.

I told DS2 off for saying it and he hadn't even really made the link. He just said it meant rubbish.

Show quote history

But in the great scheme of things how many kids sit Alevels?
Outside of the mumsnet bubble I mean
A Levels are or at least they used to be very academic ,so there must be far more kids doing Btec,s and the equivalent surely?

WombatChocolate · 31/01/2023 13:17

Isn’t this a letter saying that your DD isn’t on target to get a place in the 6th Form……rather than a categorical ‘you have been rejected right now’?

That difference is really important to understand.

It is also really important that the school is honest with people at this stage. As others have said, unless it is spelled out very clearly, lots of students and parents just assume there will be a place and don’t look at alternative options and then in August have nowhere to go.

You have to be realistic and plan ahead. You also have to consider if this school is the right learning environment and the courses offered best for DD, regardless of the friendship thing. What this means is quite simply org arising to have several options in the table and DD knowing that like everyone else, she wi t know until August exactly where she’s going and what to do…..but you will be making sure, there is sone5hung suitable and good. The way you present this is really important. It needs to be a positive angle, with the focus on there WILL be somewhere and it will be the RIGHT place and she can rely on you helping her have that.

So, find some colleges with suitable courses and get that sorted out. In all likelihood a place in the school 6th Form is still available IF she meets the entry requirements, and she hasn’t been rejected right now. The important thing is she understands they are serious about the entry requirements and that it is quite likely she will be going elsewhere. Time to process this information is actually really important. It would be much worse to be told this and it to be a surprise in August. And often, even thought he school has regularly laid out entry requirements to students, it is a surprise to them in August, unless they get a letter like this which spells it out to them on an individual basis.

You can always ask for an appointment to discuss further what the letter means so you can clarify it in your own mind, if you remain unclear if it is saying she definitely can’t come back (not legal at this point) or that it is looking unlikely based on current performance, but final decisions are made based on grades in Aug.

Gruffling · 31/01/2023 13:28

I'd agree with other posters that an FE college could be a more supportive environment for your DD.

As an undiagnosed autistic teenager, I really struggled with sixth form, despite being very academically able and getting very high GCSE grades.

Catspyjamas17 · 31/01/2023 14:51

I went to a sixth form college as the local authority wanted them and got rid of all school sixth forms in our area.

LavenderHillMob · 31/01/2023 20:48

What did DD say when you discussed alternative options with her OP?

If you can, I would look at taking the pressure off a teen you suspect to have ASD by guiding them towards the education that meets their needs.

What I absolutely wouldn't be doing is getting a maths tutor. She needs to know how proud you will be if she works hard and achieves her predicted grades. Don't push her to do more than that.

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