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Can DH come home this weekend?

63 replies

Blondbombsite · 26/01/2023 12:30

My DH is working away Sun-Fri for the next 4 weeks. Whilst he’s been gone our DS1 has really been missing him and has been under the weather with cold-like symptoms.

Today he’s woken up with spots which the nurse says may be chickenpox and to keep an eye on it. The problem is that DH has never had it despite his mum repeatedly trying to expose him to it as a child (it was the 80s!). I’m not 100% at the moment but if it does turn out to be CP can DH come home tomorrow (they definitely won’t have scabbed over by then).

I think DS will really struggle not seeing him for another week and selfishly so will I. Sleep has been non-existent and I’m 10weeks pregnant so could do with the help. But DH really can’t afford to be ill 😭

OP posts:
KangarooKenny · 26/01/2023 12:31

Of course he can come home.

toomuchlaundry · 26/01/2023 12:33

Have you had it OP?

pinkyredrose · 26/01/2023 12:33

No he'll be at risk of shingles!

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Martinisarebetterdirty · 26/01/2023 12:34

Shingles can be very dangerous. He shouldn’t come home and he should look into having the vaccine for chicken pox.

Blondbombsite · 26/01/2023 12:35

toomuchlaundry · 26/01/2023 12:33

Have you had it OP?

Yes.

OP posts:
GerbilsForever24 · 26/01/2023 12:35

pinkyredrose · 26/01/2023 12:33

No he'll be at risk of shingles!

Anyone is at risk of shingles. Previous case of chickenpox does NOT remove the risk of shingles.

If your DH has been exposed multiple times and never got it, I'm inclined to think he's immune. Either way, I see no reason why he can't get it. If he was a pregnant woman who had never had it, that would be different. He should come home and support you both.

Frumpymumma · 26/01/2023 12:35

Ds would have been contagious 2 to 3 weeks before spots showing anyway

toomuchlaundry · 26/01/2023 12:36

I thought you can get chicken pox from shingles not the other way round. Chicken pox in an adult can be grim

Seeline · 26/01/2023 12:36

If he hasn't had CP, I really wouldn't risk it. I had them at 15, so older than most a was really poorly for 2 weeks. I imagine it could be really bad for an adult.

Seeline · 26/01/2023 12:37

You can only get shingles if you've previously had CP.
You cannot catch shingles from CP.

FictionalCharacter · 26/01/2023 12:38

I wouldn’t risk it. A friend had chickenpox as an adult and really suffered badly. Adults seem to have much worse of a time of it than children.

SoulCaptain · 26/01/2023 12:38

If your DH has never had Chicken Pox then I wouldn't knowingly expose him to it. Can be awful in adults. (And shingles is reactivation of the CP virus, can only occur in those who have had CP)

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 26/01/2023 12:39

I’d err on the side of caution and say no. Chicken pox as an adult can be really harsh and miserable.

Zola1 · 26/01/2023 12:39

He won't get shingles, but he could get chicken pox.. my Dad caught it off us when we were kids, he was really unwell. Had them in his eyes and everything

Spudina · 26/01/2023 12:39

If your DH had not had chicken pox, he CANNOT catch shingles from Chicken Pox. He would catch chicken pox, which can be unpleasant in adults.

Blondbombsite · 26/01/2023 12:40

Frumpymumma · 26/01/2023 12:35

Ds would have been contagious 2 to 3 weeks before spots showing anyway

I thought it was 2-3 days? Meaning he’d caught it after DH left on Sunday.

OP posts:
Scoose · 26/01/2023 12:40

You can only get shingles if you have previously had chicken pox, I wouldn't risk it op . Chicken pox in adults is horrendous, my husband caught them from our dd a few years ago and nearly ended up in hospital they were so severe he was in bed for three weeks.

Motnight · 26/01/2023 12:42

I got chicken pox in my late 40s. I was very poorly.

DesertRose64 · 26/01/2023 12:42

I knew a very nice man who passed away from Chicken Pox after being infected by his daughter. He was in his late 30’s. I’ve never forgotten him even though this happened about 40 years ago.

RatherBeRiding · 26/01/2023 12:42

Not sure if this is helpful, but you can get sub-clinical chicken pox - my DM swore blind I'd never had it as a child, both my DC got it as children and I never caught it despite being in close proximity so I can only assume I had it as a child but showed no symptoms. Not sure if there's a blood test that will show CP antibodies or the like?

MrsElm · 26/01/2023 12:43

Blondbombsite · 26/01/2023 12:40

I thought it was 2-3 days? Meaning he’d caught it after DH left on Sunday.

So your DH has already been exposed, as DS will have been infectious before he left.

Frumpymumma · 26/01/2023 12:43

Nope 2 to 3 weeks

traintraveller · 26/01/2023 12:45

CP is most infective 1-2 days before the rash appears and continues until all lesions crusted. It has an incubation period of up to 3 weeks.

Blondbombsite · 26/01/2023 12:45

I’m not worried about Shingles, just CP. hHe has been exposed lots of times but never caught it. SIL never caught it either, despite going to ‘chicken pox parties.’ I don’t think their DF ever had it either.

I’m inclined to think he’s immune and in normal circumstances we’d just muddle through with me doing more hands on stuff like bathing and nappy changes, but he’s on a course that is difficult to get on and costs his employer a lot of money so he can’t afford to miss it.

OP posts:
SeaToSki · 26/01/2023 12:46

I would see if you can get him a rapid chicken pox antibody blood test. Look at private providers, not the NHS. It will tell you if he is immune to chicken pox or not (he made have been infected as a child but didnt show symptoms). If he doesnt have antibodies, he should get vaccinated.

If you are exposed to chickenpox and arent immune and then have a vaccination within 72 hours of the exposure, it will reduce the severity of the disease. So maybe he just gets vaccinated and comes home!