Question for those born in December & January!

[IVF20233]

Do you like your birthday being in December or January (and around Christmas time)?

We are at the beginning stages of going through fertility treatment. I’m not sure if i’m over thinking things but i’ve been wondering whether it would be best to continue as planned or avoid TTC during the two months which will most likely mean I give birth during December/January.

i’m not even sure it’s ethically or morally ok to avoid certain months! Please let me know your thoughts

Hi OP, my DC2 has just had his birthday and we realised it would be dark and miserable so took him and some pals to a lovely softplay. They had a great day and there was no 'festive fatigue' in evidence.

DC1 has a May birthday and it's no better or worse, from what I've seen. DH has an August birthday and he's always bitter that no one's around to celebrate as have summer plans!

I’m currently doing IVF and it wouldn’t even have occurred to me to not do it this month. It’s been such a slog to get to this point (self-referred and self-funded due to same sex relationship) and I am so glad to be able to get going. A birthday is one day of the year and not the be all and end all. I would be happy to celebrate the life of my child at any point.

You never know what will happen with your IVF or how long it may take. I know I wasn’t willing to put it off but you might be different and that’s fine.

Please don't delay TTC on what the birth month will be.

Early December birthday - plus being that there are set Christmas menus, so restaurants/bars are all geared up, but tend to get booked up.

But two of my children have awkward birthdays - one being in summer holidays so rarely are all her friends around on her birthday and the other has a birthday in Feb half term.

So, don't worry specifically about December .

Good luck!!!!

As a just-turned-10yo, ds2 thinks January birthdays are pants cos it's hard to book the things he'd like to do and he does get a little jealous of his brothers options for days out etc in late summer.

I wouldn't have chosen it, tbh.

Ds birthday is close to Christmas. He says he doesn't mind. People are up for a party and often home. He is 21 now. We celebrated him in June until he was 8 where he requested to just have his birthday in December as normal and have kept w that.

Dd2 is early January. She says its hard noone has money or want to go out the silver lining is she gets amazing gifts as people spend £20 on what at Christmas cost £40.

Dh December snd mine January. Horrible time of year for a birthday. All my kids were planned spring babies which a lovely but we had no problems getting pregnant so were lucky

I'm towards end of January and it has never bothered me. My family always celebrated my birthday as a child with a restaurant family meal on the day and a party with friends so I was never made to feel it was an inconvenience so close to Christmas. I'm due my second in the next 3 weeks and not even thinking about that honestly!

My DD is august. Youngest in school year and everyone away for her birthday. Jan or Dec would be better for sure

No. My birthday is 18th December and I've never liked it. Everyone is always too busy to come to your party, you don't get the full balloons/cards decorations as Christmas is up. When younger people only buy you 1 gift for both Christmas and Birthday (or put a box of chocolates or "something extra" with it all call it both despite your siblings getting 2 full gifts) and sometimes wrap your birthday gift in Christmas paper (petty to mention but still annoying). Restaurants are always booked up with office parties and usually rowdy. Menus are limited as they're also doing a Christmas menu. The weather is crap. You have a whole 12 months of waiting for another celebration to come around before birthday/Christmas again. Just feels like you've been short changed and your birthday is just an inconvenience in the run up to big JCs.

While at uni my friend suggested I release my inner Queen and have 2 birthdays. So 18th June is my unofficial birthday when I do my celebrating and have a party or go for a meal.

I have a Christmas child. She wasn’t meant to be, she was born early.

If I could have avoided her being born at Christmas I absolutely would have.

People are selfish and thoughtless and the child doesn’t get a proper birthday.

I love my January birthday, even though it often meant that I'd get a single present for both when I was younger, from family friends etc, because everyone was poor then. I love Christmas so much, and having a January birthday gave me something to look forward to when we went back to school.

Even the 'single present' worked as I got older - I could ask my parents for something big (perfume, jewellery, or record player) which they couldn't have afforded if they had to get two lots of presents.

I still love it now, although the day itself is a bit of a 'nothing special' once I've opened my cards - especially as I usually have my birthday party in spring because the weather is too dodgy for people to travel in January.

I cetainly don't think it's worth delaying TTC to avoid.

Mine is just before Christmas day and it's never been like a birthday. My dad made the effort to separate the two when I was little. Now as an adult, nobody really has the money to do anything and I'm too busy doing Christmas to really bother about my own birthday being a thing.

I'd not have a child near Christmas for those reasons.

I came to tell you, that husband and I were avoiding to conceive April-June baby, so I feel ya and your preference isn't weird to me. I have a friend born in January and she hates it, because she thinks she turns year older earlier than others.

I'm PG with July baby, so everyone will be out of school for birthdays. You can't have it all 😂

2nd week of December birthday here, and a DC with an end of December birthday.

For me, all good, although some relatives insisted on "joint" present, where my summer born sibling got 2. Mine weren't twice the value, but i didn't really care and everyone else was great. I love Winter and love Christmas and as a young adult most years there was some event on my birthday, and people used to buy me drinks and be nice and kind about having to always put up with Christmas stuff

DC? it's NYE so tricky. Never had a party on their birthday, stingy gifts when the party finally arrived, as an adult, has a blast and doesn't mind. Like me loves winter and Christmas.

My friends who have birthdays in December and January really hate it. I was one of those people who actively avoided conceiving in the months that would have given the baby a birthday in those 2 months.

I think if it had taken us a while to conceive and got to the a year of trying we would have no longer been bothered by that.

My mums birthday is in January, mine is in June.
my dad always brought her something small in January and then a ‘day of birth’ present on my birthday. She loves it as by June she’s running out of her Christmas perfume etc. so it’s a nice top up for her.

I am pregnant and due 23rd Jan, our plan is that our little one will get small presents in January and then some in June on my birthday and then when they are old enough they can decide when they’d like to celebrate etc. I’m all for having something in summer if they want.

On a side note my DH has 2 children from a previous relationship who are born between Christmas and NY so he will soon have 3 birthdays and Christmas within 4 weeks! 😂

My DC is end of Jan. It's not the month anyone would choose but is fine. Xmas feels long gone by then, decs are down, people are available for parties etc. Deals to be had.

We avoided March/April and since we caught straightaway I'm glad we did, as it might have been end of Dec.

Just go for it. Many months have advs and disadvs.
I have a Jan, July and Aug.
It was awful having a new born in Jan. It was lovely in the summer. But summer burns have more disadvantages being young in academic year (both academically and it they are sporty) so I'd actually pick Sept if I went again!!!

Posted too soon! Was just to add I have a good friend who is end of Dec and they always feel so lost in the Xmas stuff. I think that Xmas/NY window is the one to avoid (if that's possible!)

Not me (I’m a July birthday and love it!) but DD and DP are December and DM is January.

So far DD’s early December birthday has been surprisingly fine - people are in a festive mood and not yet partied out, and it’s far enough away from Christmas that the two celebrations don’t merge together. They’re in the midst of doing fun Christmas-themed stuff at school, and she’s unlikely to ever have a major exam on her birthday (unlike my early June born best friend, who hated this aspect of her birthday!) DP and DM’s are harder - DP’s mid December birthday does tend to get a bit overlooked, and DM’s is the worst (post-Christmas blues, having to think of yet another present, no one especially up for celebrating).

With DD we’ve found you have to be a bit creative when it comes to parties, due to the weather and the fact that so much is geared towards Christmas (eg our local family theatre does special birthday party/show packages, which DD would have loved… but not in December). It is a bit annoying having birthday and Christmas celebrations/gifts within a few weeks of each other, but it’s doable. But we consider ourselves lucky, as DD’s original due date was Boxing Day, but she arrived early!

I definitely wouldn’t wait. As a primary teacher I saw how the older children in the year were largely more confident and found the early years of school easier, which to me is a much bigger issue than the timing of birthday celebrations. And while I now love my summer birthday, as a teen it was a pain being the youngest and last to reach every milestone.

So, as with everything, there are pros and cons, and I definitely wouldn’t avoid ttc to dodge a Christmas/January birthday.

I hate having a January birthday. But I wouldn’t delay TTC because of that.

At the risk of sounding very high maintenance (I posted yesterday about having to use your shit occasionally to have nice adult children) I love my very early January birthday now. We usually go away, as dc grow up with school holidays and then annual leave, it's an efficient time of year to lake leave and my lovely friends who were often flat post Christmas when I tried to arrange things as teenagers get greeted with a bikini photo when they send me birthday greetings :)

January birthday hate it. As people say everyone broke. My daughter early Dec. But she likes it.

@Alici couldn't agree more. My DD is 20th December (she was 6 weeks early). She's just had her 19th birthday. Gives me the rage when her birthday presents are wrapped in Christmas paper - you wouldn't do that in June would you?! Or Christmas cards saying 'hope you have a nice birthday too' with no separate card??!! And 'here's your birthday AND Christmas present '😡. We make sure her birthday is separate as it gets lost in all the Christmas build up and festivities.