I’m 41 today, can anyone pep talk me for 5 mins?

[wobblymum1]

That’s it really.
marriage is ending bitterly, ds (9) waiting final assessment for austism, tics and anxiety and spends 90% of time alone in room gaming and meltdowns to get him out are horrendous, my dd has sweetly made me a card and we’ll go for a dog walk but that’s it really for today. Normally we’d go for a family meal but Dh won’t talk to me and won’t come so would just be me and kids and I can’t afford it on my own, and anyway to get my son out his room would involve a 2 hour battle I can’t face today.
Just need a few “pull yourself together” comments today as quite frankly would like to hide under the covers and not appear again for a while. Thank you (all)

Happy birthday x You deserve to be happy and it’s sad things are tough.

hopefully over this year your son’s assessments will be over and you may be able to source help and support for him and you.

and hopefully by the time you are 42 you will be free of a husband who is not showing you love and care.

Morning @wobblymum1
How are things with you?
Hope you're OK.

How kind of you to think of me 💞I’m ok I guess. Just getting through the days really. Wish I felt happier! how are you? I’m pushing for some help today with my son so I hope that might help a bit. feeling pointlessly envious of those in happy supportive relationships which I hate feeling. Love that I can be open on here.

Morning. I'm good thanks @wobblymum1
It is so hard, getting the help you need but do persevere as it will be worth it. We have a dd with ASD and it feels like an uphill battle to get support. It zaps your mental energy too, but keep on going as it will be helpful when you get the help you need for him.
Yes, it must be hard when dealing with the relationship too. Can you see any upsides to not being in the relationship yet? Do you feel more free? Are you not having having to accommodate him & can just focus on you & the kids? Although this time must feel really hard, it could be the gateway to allow new people & new relationships into your life in the future. I hope the counselling comes through for you & it helps.
I love that MN allows us to chat freely on here. It helps to know others have similar experiences and come through the other side.
Do you do anything that might help, whilst you wait for counselling? I know these can sound a bit woo, but I write in a journal each day & it helps to look back & see what progress I've made. I also paid for a meditation course called The Braveway by Sinead Hegarty (£40 approx) and you can use it over & over. It's really lovely & calming.
I hope you have a decent day.

This sounds rubbish OP. Do you get on with people at work? Could you go out for a coffee with a colleague if you’re not too busy?
Hope your 42nd makes up for it next year 😊

I encourage you to keep trying for help, no need to go at this alone xx

That’s so kind. I work full time from home so I’m alone until i pick up the kids from school then I take a break to look after them and then finish my hours in the evening. It keeps me busy but it is quite isolating.

Thank you so much, that’s really understanding. I do feel it’s an immense uphill mental struggle with my son just now. He is so unhappy and so anxious and I wish I could help him. I did try a journal but seemed to only reflect how little progress or hope i had so I stopped it. The meditation programme sounds nice, I’ll give that a try. Thank you so much. I don’t feel free yet, I feel scared and my children blame me for the separation which is hard. It’s all just hard. Thank you for caring x

Thank you so much, the kindness here really
means so much to me and helps me feel not alone x