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Original poster

Is it rude to read someone's wall calendar?

67 replies

IwtHs · 08/01/2023 09:09

I have a friend who does this.
She will always stand by it in the kitchen and read it.

It doesn't usually bother me but I have a private appointment noted down and I purposely wrote it in small. I noticed she leaned in closer to read that one.

Is it rude to read someone's calendar or should I be keeping private appointments in a diary or something?

OP posts:

pelargoniums · 08/01/2023 13:24

GreyCarpet · 08/01/2023 10:25

Er, me.

I have a friend who leaves bank statements and credit card bills amongst other things on his kitchen table.

I can't help but see the letter head if he invites me to sit down but I always cover it with something so I can't accidentally catch sight of more.

Show quote history

Ha! Fair. Whereas I will do a full Exorcist head spin to see how much their mortgage is or what they plonked on the credit card.

Deathraystare · 08/01/2023 13:46

I dont normally. None of my business but with one person I do. She has early dementia so I like to know if there are any hospital visits soon as I sometimes need to take her instead of her daughter, though her daughter always asks me beforehand.

usedtolovenaps · 08/01/2023 13:48

I don't know why this thread made me laugh 😂
But yes, it's rude. I wouldn't feel to comfortable.

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Goodread1 · 08/01/2023 13:50

Yes obviously it's rude to take an interest in personal stuff as such as that,
Do you really have to ask ,

purplecorkheart · 08/01/2023 13:52

Rude, just as it would be rude to pick up an appointment book and read it.

WedonttalkaboutMaureen · 08/01/2023 14:22

Of course it's rude!
A glance at the picture on your way past to the biscuit tin ok fine.
But to stand and read someone else's appts and reminders is bloody rude!

I'd be putting my next meet-up with her on the calendar as "Super-Nosy coffee 10am"

MyGirlDaisy · 08/01/2023 14:32

My line of work means I am in and out of people’s houses when they are not there. I never read calendars or mail left out, that would be very rude!

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 08/01/2023 14:36

To be so blatant about it is extremely rude, yes. I would agree with a pp to close the cover over when this friend nosy oik is visiting...

Cherryblossoms85 · 08/01/2023 14:40

I don't get it. Surely everyone who puts the information on display assumes it can be read. Which is why I don't put "10am Hollywood wax" I just put 10 am appointment. And the details in my diary. My calendar has family photos so I expect people to look at it.

johsq20 · 08/01/2023 16:47

Probably but I'm nosey and would read it too unless covered or in a private location like office etc.

TheAbsentGazelle · 08/01/2023 17:25

My ex-MIL used to do this every time she visited. She would flip ahead to the next month, and flip it back to the previous month to have a look at those too.

She also used to read any cards we had up which were on display. Christmas, birthday, even valentines and anniversary cards to each other! Ex-DP never saw anything wrong with it but it used to make my blood boil.

CoffeeBoy · 08/01/2023 17:32

Yanbu. Next time she does it say “oi, Trunky want a bun?”

call her out on it!

stopringingme · 08/01/2023 17:33

When she comes over turn it over so the blank pages are on show.

UsingChangeofName · 08/01/2023 18:03

Of course it is rude, BUT, as you seem to be aware she does this, and presumably knew she was likely to be in your kitchen, then if you wanted to keep it private, you were daft to put that much information on there. You could have just put time and 'Appt' or some initials or not very obvious abbreviation.

Gobbolino7825 · 08/01/2023 18:18

We came back from an evening out to find our calendar on the side

The babysitter must have been reading through it, it fell off the wall and the nail it was on had gone missing so she couldn't put it back up.

Never used her again - wondered what else she had been nosing through. Totally wrong and rude in my opinion!

StaceySolomonSwash · 08/01/2023 18:26

Not a calendar but I suspected a friend was regularly nosing through my glove compartment in my car when I went to pay for petrol. So I left an opened envelope addressed to me in there with a note saying "you can't complain if I call you nosey, can you?"

I got back in the car and she couldn't meet my eyes.

I have no idea what she thought I was hiding as before then I'd pretty much been an open book to her but she's never got as close to me since. And I don't tell her a thing.

ShyMaryEllen · 08/01/2023 18:40

I wouldn't dream of reading someone's calendar, or nosing through cards on the mantelpiece. It's very rude. I suppose if the calendar is positioned right next to a chair and you invite someone to sit in it, you can't expect them to close their eyes, but deliberately reading is another matter.

My mum was terrible for this, and my sister and I came up with some outrageous appointments to put on sister's calendar - Take kids to SS appointment. Drug clinic 11.00. Estate agent re mum's house valuation. That sort of thing. She had the grace to laugh about it, but it didn't stop her reading the valentine card that BIL had sent to sister.

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