If you're a foregneir in UK...

[CrocoShriek]

...what are the things you love and hate about living here?
I'll start (apologies, it's a bit England-centric)
Love:
-the countryside
-Sunday roasts
-London's melting pot
-low expectations on being fashionable ( I think!)

Hate:
-sticky Pub floors
-lack of proper blue sky in winter
-obsession with cards...thank you/ xmas/birthday etc.

Dh has been here thirty years. He says:

Positives:
The people
The humour
The history - really interesting and beautiful towns and villages which have buildings that have stood for centuries and never been flattened by war or town planners. This is a double edged sword though as they weren’t designed for modern living, and they get choked with traffic now and children can’t play safely outside.
The language
Cultural capital, from Orwell to Monty Python
Diversity
Queues - much more relaxing than fighting to get to the front
The landscape, countryside
London, Edinburgh
Spicy food

Negatives
Indirectness - hate not being able to just tell people to do stuff without causing offence, and having to dance around the issue instead.
The politics
The anti immigration constituency.
& obviously the big one, Brexit and the little Englanders who voted for it.

He is amused that kindness to animals has come up a lot. He thinks we’re all mad on that front, and that it’s appalling that kindness to humans doesn’t come higher. He then cheerfully sat holding a guinea pig that one of the dc plonked in his lap and chatted to it, utterly without irony 😂

I hope everyone here is entitled to vote. Loving the anti Tory sentiment on this thread.

Indirectness - hate not being able to just tell people to do stuff without causing offence, and having to dance around the issue instead.

I remember in my first few years here I was pulled up for being too 'aggressive' with my team members. Saying 'Please do X, Y, Z to this deadline' wasn't ok. I still find myself consciously having to dance around with 'if you could do x thing to y deadline, that would be great.' The syntax kills me let alone the inability to be direct.

I agree! It’s also difficult when being on the receiving end as employee and not quite understanding what your boss means, trying to read the hints. Just tell me directly what needs doing by when and what to prioritise - would be so much simpler!

It can indeed be very difficult to follow. My Ukrainian guest is a painter and decorator. He’s trying to get established here and I’m helping him by accompanying him on first visits to clients. His English is admittedly not brilliant, but he’s got the basics - if only people would speak simply and directly! But so often, oh my god the apologetic flannel!

Example, last week:

Client: So it’s this room here, the ceiling is crying out. You see this door frame? Bit scruffy isn’t it, but a new coat will cheer it up no end I’m sure! Don’t bother with the skirting, I’ve got blah blah happening in the summer [insert long irrelevant ramble] so no point doing that right now, thanks all the same, ho ho. This wall could do with freshening up if you wouldn’t mind, while you’re at it. Oh and the en-suite too, might as well. If it’s not too much trouble!”

Ukrainian looks at him blankly, and then at me in panic.

Me: “Paint ceiling, door frame, this wall, that bathroom. Don’t paint skirting.”

Ukrainian, relieved: “Yes! I can do all of this”

@RampantIvy i think your response is reflective of how narrow the path to ‘success’ is in the UK (higher test scores leading to a prestigious university) and maybe a reason why many parents have lower expectations?

in my home country (North America) there are so many more paths to socially recognisable success, so much more space for kids to explore interests and far more flexibility if you develop at a different pace or are a bit lop sided in your strengths. I think as a result parents feel that ANY child can be successful, and their role is to help uncover strengths/ passions and then push their kids towards excellence. You can get into a RG or even oxbridge equivalent school with mediocre test results if the rest of your portfolio is strong enough. There’s also a lot more respect for less selective / prestigious schools as many brilliant children go there for financial reasons. Your success is measured by what you do after your degree or instead of a degree entirely

I feel like in the UK children are weighed and measured so early and so definitively. To be ambitious in the UK means to try and force your kid into that mould and hope they measure up. If not, well, everything else is treated like a lesser path.

It's so interesting - we make our kids do their big make-or-break exams that determine so much about their next stages of education when they're 16. In the US that's tenth grade, right - so they're sophomores? There's a reason that 'sophomoric' is an adjective that describes a certain kind of behaviour and it's not because that age is famed for great wisdom and maturity.

It feels such a hangover from when the age to leave school and get a job was 14, then 16, and while the rules have changed (education until 18, etc) the basic education structures and exams haven't at all.

I'm just reading one of the maths threads as well and one suggestion there is that one reason maths is seen as 'hard' and so many people don't leave school with adequate maths skills is that the English system has to try to get so much content in before they're 16 and so many never do maths again.

@JassyRadlett so true, was discussing maths with my English husband last night. I really struggled with math my freshman year of high schoolbut in years 11 and 12 the more advanced content clicked with me and ended up scoring top 1% in advanced placement exams. An exam is just a partial assessment of where you are at a given point in time - it doesn’t reflect the totality of your capabilities or potential. if you had tested in y9/10 i would have done poorly vs expectations.

We have kids in ks1 now, and they move through content so quickly. It feels like a slower pace would allow for more consolidation of key skills, as well as more opportunities for applied practice. I have ended up begrudgingly spending structured time every day doing extra math with them just to make sure they fully understand what they are racing through in school.

I think it's a sign of genuine affection on both sides,

The British and Australians that I know always take the piss out of their friends.

You know you are accepted when someone insults you to your face.

You can get into a RG or even oxbridge equivalent school with mediocre test results if the rest of your portfolio is strong enough.

How does that work @Labraradabrador? If a student with BBC at A level got into Oxford to study history because they were the next potential England/Scotland/Wales rugby international, how would they keep up with the students who achieved all A* at A level?

How can they reach the same level of academic achievement if it is beyond their capability? Do they study "easier" subjects in the US or are grade boundaries lower?

I'm British and work with non Brits, who all live in the UK. When we get together, the conversation will invariably lead to criticising: the weather, public transport... So I always ask why they live here and every time, they look surprised and say, "oh but it's beautiful!". We have to put up with all that bloody rain but really, nobody does spring better than us.

Really interesting thread, thank you!

You assume tests are an accurate reflection of academic ability - they really aren’t.

by portfolio, I don’t just mean sports achievement. When you apply to university in the us you have to write multiple essays, interviews, recommendations from teachers (which teachers take very seriously), proof of consistent achievement in coursework over 3 - 4 years in addition to standardised tests and some subject specific exams AND they will also look at achievement outside of school including sport, volunteering, employment, additional educational programmes, etc. you don’t have to do everything, but doing brilliantly on tests or even tests and coursework is insufficient to get into Harvard. It is meant to look at candidates holistically.

as a process it has its downsides (some US parents do put pressure on their kids to do too much), but your entire future doesn’t revolve around how you perform in a couple of days of exams. It also encourages kids to be well rounded as it allows multiple pathways to achieve success.

I know right! Think it's kind of true though!

How does the UK not have the weather for skiing?!

The Cairngorms in the Scottish Highlands is popular for skiing, snowboarding and other winter sports!

This whole thread seems very England and London centric. The UK is made up of Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. It definitely isn't flat! Northern Ireland has the Sperrin and the Mournes. Wales and Scotland have world famous mountains. England does have mountains.

Obviously meant in addition to England. 🤦‍♂️🤣

How does the UK not have the weather for skiing?!

I understood that the Cairngorms didn't get enough consistent snow to gurantee skiing. I'm sure I read somewhere that the resorts were struggling.

I agree that this thread is very London centric. It's very hilly where I live, but we don't get enough snow for skiing.

I'm from here so I'll do my dad's:

Loves:

• Graveyards. Literally the number one thing he always goes on about. In his country they have to be very uniform and there's strict regulations about what you can put on graves and keeping then tidy - he loves our rambling overgrown ones.

• British countryside

• Abundance of good quality vegetarian/vegan/allergy-friendly food and good coffee shops to be found in even the most rural villages

• Cryptic crosswords and other fondness for word games (he's not keen on Scrabble, though)

• Tolerance of general eccentricity

Humour is a neutral as he likes it but it's similar in both countries.

.Hates:

• Weird obsession with the Royal Family/period dramas

• Weird obsession with animals, much like @VenusClapTrap's DH

• FPTP system of government

• Sunday newspapers skipping a week if the Sunday is a special day (e.g. Christmas Day), rather than just doing a Monday edition instead

• Tendency to eat chips with any type of food regardless of ethnic provenance or whether they go together. Curry and chips is an abomination that only the British could think up, never mind consider edible.

If there's not enough snow, they use the snow machine to make artificial snow.

The Cairngorms has 32km of slopes suitable for skiing, snowboarding and other winter sports.

I always see people coming up here for skiing holidays each year.

Love:

• Pubs

-cafes with lovely sandwiches - bacon brie and cranberry is my fav -countryside/walks -rhe history and days out -trains -get outside in any weather attitude and the kit to do it -chocolate -sunday roasts -walkability

Hate:
-traffic on motorways, especially for seasonal travel
-how small houses are
-not having a tumble dryer and the washing machine being in the kitchen
-damp houses
-shops with no parking
-playgrounds - all ancient and in desperate need of updating. Or the new ones are really small even if there is plenty of space in the playground for bigger equipment

The chips with everything made me think of one:

The double carb meal. I'd never encountered this until I came to live in the UK and was astonished to see people eat meals like pizza with chips! I don't think it's something I love or hate, just something I find quite odd.

@MotherofPearl a chip butty! I thought it was satire the first time it was described to me.

Chips with lasagne. The first time I saw that it confused me greatly!

I'm glad to hear the Scottish ski resorts are still thriving @DownNative

Chips with pizza or lasagne - why?

Yes, the chip butty and chips with lasagne are two great Double Carb Meal examples.

There are some really amazing goods in the UK. My favourite is all the cheese: cheddar, Stilton, proper Red Leicester, crumbly Lancashire... I could go on.

Can't believe no one has said they love Britain because of the quality of our TV dramas you want a new detective series every night of the week, you got it!