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How do guests drive you mad....

118 replies

PandaPop34 · 02/01/2023 14:40

Now Xmas/NY is out the way, guests are returning home. It's so difficult having others in the house and in your space .
People live so differently !!!!!!
how have your guests drove you mad or what weird things have they done?

needing a laugh to breath through multiple things broken/wrecked before I deep clean HAHA
NC just incase!

OP posts:
SunshineAndFizz · 03/01/2023 18:42

When they turn up with 'just a little cough' and end up giving you all the flu.

Ladybug14 · 03/01/2023 18:44

@DDemBonesDemBones - could he have dementia?

chimichangaz · 03/01/2023 18:57

Not had visitors over Christmas but thinking about when a relative came to stay (invited herself) for a week before the pandemic. I'd spent ages doing a menu plan, shopping etc and cooking all the meals while working full time. She never offered to cook. When I stay with her I always always buy food to cook, I never expect to be fed for free.

I live alone with adult son, and we rub along very nicely together but I really struggled with my relative!! And I am most definitely not a morning person, which she knows, but she'd hear me get up to make my coffee before work and rush downstairs to talk my ears off - it was all I could do to just grunt at her!!

And also when my sister stays she annoys me by picking up her phone the second it pings, even if we're in the middle of talking or eating. She's bloody obsessed with it!!

I just think I'm better off not being around people Blush

DemBonesDemBones · 03/01/2023 18:58

@Ladybug14 well I guess you can't rule it out but I suspect actually life long unmanaged autism/aspergers. His house has always been Kim and Aggie style filthy. I honestly think he thinks it's normal.

Lordofthebutterfloofs · 03/01/2023 19:03

BigSandyBalls2015 · 02/01/2023 16:15

Blimey broken stuff is a bit much OP!

I found the constant chatter about nothing very tiresome this year. I don’t know if he has got worse (DHs uncle), or if I’m less tolerant of it. He followed me around the house talking at me.

I locked myself in the loo with my phone and a glass of wine and he talked through the door …. it took all my willpower not to shout JUST PLEASE FUCK OFF

He followed you to the loo and expected you to talk to him through the door? Your DH needs to have a word, he is so inappropriate.

maddy68 · 03/01/2023 19:11

Loud voices.
TV on constantly
Not using a coaster
Ashtrays full
Bin is always full

Timeforachangeisitnot · 03/01/2023 19:24

Arriving and immediately announcing their flight back is 3 days later than planned - they knew just weren’t honest
Leaving every light and radiator in the house on full, wet towels hanging on radiators (?), all curtains closed , when they go out. Real nice to come home to
Advising that they will get most of their own meals, then asking what I am cooking
Staying in bed late on last day, while their kids run amok, as ‘they have work next day’ No shit - what about me?

Not this year - happened once, never again.
Thanks for this. I really need to let it out

18e6281o62 · 03/01/2023 20:18

I needed this thread!! PIL are leaving tomorrow and it's all I can do to not ask them how early they're leaving. I can't have them for this long again.

Non-stop talking combined with constant interruptions when someone else is talking.

Repeatedly proudly saying that they don't eat lunch but hovering around us the whole time when we eat lunch. They eventually cave in and have toast but would absolutely refuse if I offered what we were eating.

Along the same lines, refuse snacks and then when we get it out, they'll just have a "little" slice.

Not waiting until everyone is ready to start eating before tucking in.

Helping themselves to seconds without checking if anybody else wants some.

"Helping" and hovering in the kitchen. Running a cup under a tap does not constitute a clean. Now I just let them wash up and put it all in the dishwasher when they're not looking. A new kitchen one is leaving the recycling by the recycling bin but not actually putting it in. Constantly asking if we have enough milk when we clearly do.

Faux politeness as PP have said - "either coffee or tea is fine; do you mind if I get some water; etc" FFS, just tell me. I spent more time going back and forth to get an answer than just getting a teabag or coffee out.

Deciding things for my DC. E.g. "you can have pudding if you eat your tea". No, that's my or DHs job.

Not asking for things they need. They went out to buy tissues when we have a whole cupboard of them and bringing their own full length mirror when I've asked repeatedly if they need anything else in their room. We have all this, they just need to say.

I could go on and on but starting to wonder if this is becoming outing. Very therapeutic. Thanks, OP!

Cherrysoup · 03/01/2023 20:29

Sparking up a fag in the lounge-we’re not smokers-then when asked to get out, simpering that she ‘forgot’. Fuck off.

CeriB82 · 03/01/2023 20:32

after reading these posts, you all need to stop being doormats and say no to guests.

you should not be putting up with this. Families or not. Life is short, too short to have rude miserable people in it.

im seriously glad to have stopped my family staying over

DemBonesDemBones · 03/01/2023 20:42

@CeriB82 but how?! We live in a different country, where else would they stay?

CeriB82 · 03/01/2023 20:52

Hotel/hire a place? They may not stay long if they pay, they are taking the liberty and you cannot carry on. Its not fair on you

DemBonesDemBones · 03/01/2023 20:57

This person would think I was crazy...and make me feel crazy. My mental health is deteriorating with every day. Today they've not got dressed after I told them yesterday this was massively upsetting my SN child, and there's actual faeces on all the empty toilet rolls in the bathroom no one else is using and that I've cleaned multiple times a day (but not yesterday, I was ill.) It's like whenever I do get up the courage to say something they deliberately get worse at that thing.
Im just so sad. This isn't a life for them.

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/01/2023 21:01

I don’t understand why so many posters who clearly hate hosting continue to do it 🤷‍♀️

Lordofthebutterfloofs · 03/01/2023 21:11

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/01/2023 21:01

I don’t understand why so many posters who clearly hate hosting continue to do it 🤷‍♀️

Agreed. I can count on less than half a hand the people I would invite to stay in my house. And even then only if theirs blew up.

FancyFelix · 03/01/2023 21:14

bringing their own full length mirror

WTF. People are bonkers

To the posters asking why people continue to host family who drive them crazy, it's not really they simple is it. You become part of a couple, or marry into a family, which means you get stuck with other person's family. People who make themselves at home in your home because they're visiting their DC and feel comfortable in their DC's home.

Honestly I'm so worried that I'll become this annoying if I ever become someone's MIL!

Lordofthebutterfloofs · 03/01/2023 21:14

DemBonesDemBones · 03/01/2023 20:42

@CeriB82 but how?! We live in a different country, where else would they stay?

A hotel.

Lordofthebutterfloofs · 03/01/2023 21:22

AtleastitsnotMonday · 03/01/2023 15:08

I genuinely loved our guests, they were dreamy compared to some on here, helpful, considerate, generous, grateful etc etc. But, when no guests are here I have 'my' chair. They adopted my chair as theirs within minutes of entering the house and then became very territorial about it. I have relished the last 24 hours back in 'my' chair!!!

When my SIL visits (for the day only!) she immediately takes prime seating position in my chair in the living room. We don't really have enough seating to include visitors so I end up sitting on the floor in my own bloody house. Luckily she hasn't been for years.

It's a territorial thing and it's annoying as hell

Can you tell I hate visitors, never mind guests! 😂

Bellie99 · 03/01/2023 21:51

Had the best and worst guests in the same visit. The worst had the best guest eye rolling as well!
Best pitched in (there were 14 of us) potato peeling, washing up, entertaining little ones.
Worst sat in kitchen and never lifted a finger. Even when asked to get a knife out of cutlery drawer behind them, ignored the request and let another guest get up and get it. They slept until lunch time, and when they left I found purple hair shampoo (for protecting colour) all over the sink, shower, and on the towels. 😡

owly22 · 04/01/2023 09:28

There are too many to mention, many are similar to what others have posted. The most infuriating one was brazenly using one of my gifts (from my son, as yet unused by me) on Boxing Day before I got up and without asking me or even mentioning it. They helped themselves to it from upstairs, took it downstairs, took the labels off and just started using it as if it was theirs 😡It was the first time I had hosted this person and I will not be inviting them again.

Lmgify · 04/01/2023 10:10

My young SIL - over the years have:

  • blocked our toilet by stuffing too much toilet paper down it
  • broke our shower screen by pushing on it too much
  • broke our kitchen drawer by yanking on it too much

oh and not even bother saying thank you when I cooked her every single meal (for her two week stay) inc a full Christmas dinner when I was 7 months pregnant and being rude and combative whenever we spoke to her, obvs didn’t lift a finger

She’s not invited back again.

QueefQueen80s · 04/01/2023 10:17

Everything which is why I don't have them anymore 😆

QueefQueen80s · 04/01/2023 10:18

And I'm a very chilled and patient person in all other areas of life, just don't like people staying in my space.

QueefQueen80s · 04/01/2023 10:21

But to specify one thing.. my ex MIL rearranging my wardrobe, drawers and clothes.. good job I had removed the sexy stuff.

fatfacemumma · 04/01/2023 10:41

DemBonesDemBones · 02/01/2023 16:15

Well my relative has been here 14 days so far, not made himself so much as a cup of tea, refuses to eat at the table with the rest of us and leaves his upturned plates and cups on my newly cleaned sofa.
Orders Amazon deliveries and discards the packaging on the floor for me to pick up.
Also has a bladder infection and told me I was rude when I asked if he could wipe the seat after his billionth piss of the day and my billionth extensive clean up.
Has left the house twice and just sits in pyjamas staring at his laptop ignoring the kids. The kids he hasn't seen for 3 months.
I was so excited to show him our new house but it's been absolutely soul destroying and exhausting cleaning up after a fifth child. I'm embarassed for him.
Children are all on edge because they thought he wanted to see them but turns out he can't even be bothered to play a game with them if they ask.
They start telling him something and just trail off halfway through when he returns his attention back to the laptop.
When we visited him earlier in the year we had to get every meal from shops/restaurants because his house is too dirty to consider letting the kids eat at. I had to clean the bathroom before letting them use it and cleaned his whole house before we left.
No end in sight, either.
Phew, thanks for the outlet!

Why do you let them stay?

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