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Would you let your 16-year-old go to this party?

65 replies

middleager · 01/01/2023 08:05

My Year 12 son has been invited to an unsupervised party.

The person is hiring out an Airbnb for this party. No adults.

it's bout 7 miles away from where we live, in a really dodgy part of the city (known for high crime, drugs - a town centre where it would not be a stretch for gatecrashers to easily access said party, and there are lots of rough pubs etc).

Apparently, everybody else is going.

I'm really worried, for obvious reasons. It's not his first party, but the others were local, in homes, with adults there.

I feel so uncomfortable about this.

OP posts:
underneaththeash · 01/01/2023 23:21

hotdiggetydog · 01/01/2023 11:47

GRASS

I’d also be grassing.
my 16 yo would also not be going.

underneaththeash · 01/01/2023 23:27

This reply has been withdrawn

Message withdrawn - posted on wrong thread

underneaththeash · 01/01/2023 23:29

I’ve reported myself as I’ve posted on the wrong thread.

Hawkins001 · 01/01/2023 23:30

Yes, but make sure he has been skilled in escape and evasion skills

Veryverycalmnow · 01/01/2023 23:54

So many bad parties happen at that age, it is like a right of passage. But it is wrong to hire an air bnb for a teen party, so I would advise against it.

ScabbyHorse · 01/01/2023 23:57

I let my 16 go to an airbnb in a different town to meet his gaming pals. But I went there and met them all first and made them talk to me on the phone etc and look after him as he was the youngest.

Startwithamimosa · 02/01/2023 00:22

Nevermindthesquirrels · 01/01/2023 21:36

@Startwithamimosa It does make a big difference as likelihood of police being involved is much higher, sharing responsibility for the place getting trashed etc as is getting stuck seeing as it sounds like it's in another town. I'd be surprised if it even goes ahead tbh.
I'm not strict at all and common sense just tells me no with this.

But how would this differ from a house being trashed? Or do teens now purposely trash airbnbs? When I was a teen, if this had been an option we would've done it

ItsGettingCold · 02/01/2023 01:31

Not a chance, you know exactly what will happen. Protect your child as long as you can.

LetsDoThis2023 · 02/01/2023 08:53

No

LetsDoThis2023 · 02/01/2023 08:54

Bemyclementine · 01/01/2023 08:11

Sorry to sound like a party pooper but I think I'd be contacting the aur bnb owner.

This!

DashingWhiteSergeant · 02/01/2023 08:57

middleager · 01/01/2023 08:30

I know a good friend whose parents are definitely letting him go, but we have different ideas of risk - they have been drinking with their son at home for years now and have a more relaxed attitude.

That's one of the reasons I posted on here. I worry it is me who's out of touch, but it feels like there are so many red flags with this party that I can't relax.

Never in a million years.

if the are was that bad you probably wouldn’t want your kid shopping there, far less drinking unsupervised in someone else’s house.

LetsDoThis2023 · 02/01/2023 08:57

Obviouspretzel · 01/01/2023 08:37

Why would you contact the air bnb owner? This is literally none of your business. Either let your son go or not. I think you might be overplaying the danger of other people coming into the party from pubs etc, but it all depends on location and you will know more than I do.

Because it's the responsible adult thing to do!

LetsDoThis2023 · 02/01/2023 08:59

Vermin · 01/01/2023 11:42

There was an empty house near us that was used for air bnb parties during lockdown. It was hired by dealers who could no longer sell in clubs as they were shut - in your case maybe because the kids are too young to get into the clubs? As well as the drugs and antisocial behaviour and pairs of knickers / empty spirits bottles / box canisters littering the road after each one, there were knives and threats and (eventually) a gun pulled when one of the parties was robbed (presumably by other dealers annoyed by the activity there). They hired their own security guards for each of these parties and local police refused to attend repeatedly as too dangerous.
now yours maybe a kid with ID who has managed to con the owner but there is so much risk around this that I would say no.

Local police refused to attend?!?! WTAF?!

Vermin · 02/01/2023 10:18

@LetsDoThis2023 - yep. There’s one road in / out and they deemed to too dangerous because the police could get kettled in there by the party crew. A neighbour reported seeing a gun there (hopefully he was being creative in his attempts to get the police to turn up), and they told him to go home, lock the door and keep away from wi dows. Still didn’t send anyone. I seem to remember it was ludicrously difficult to get through to them at all (even the double stabbing/ attempted murder which was not witnessed by any of the 300 present didn’t get them into gear - but a robbery did). Air BNB were equally useless- they have a bot called Fern in San Francisco which deals with complaints by filing them away. They were making so much money out of the rentals that they didn’t care about huge insurance claims from the owner (£60k for one round of damage)

JuneOsborne · 02/01/2023 10:28

It's the whole AirBnB thing I don't like. Why wouldn't you have it at your house? Because you don't want your house trashed, so we'll hire someone else house for them to trash.

That's the bit that would have me saying no. Not the unsupervised bit, I think that's more normal.

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