DRY JANUARY 2023! Been overindulging? Drinking crept up? Want to begin a healthy new you? This way please. All welcome!

[HPLikecraft]

It’s that time of year again... the late Christmas present to our livers!
You may be thinking of doing Dry January to:

*detox a little after seasonal overindulgence, or
*help you cut down a bit generally, or
*help you start to get out of a harmful alcohol habit, or
*just be a bit healthier for a month...

It’s good for all of those things!

I find the MN DJ threads excellent for support, encouragement, sharing info, ‘we’re in this together’ camaraderie, suggestions for grown up drinks, aversion techniques and just fun.

This is my sixth year of DJ and I swear it may have saved my life; it was so hard first time, but having succeeded I did dry June and October after that, and do so most years. It has broken my habit, banished much of the craving and reset my relationship with booze. I imagine it's added years to my life.

I won’t be finding DJ too difficult this year, but some will. Hopefully this thread will help.

Throw your hat in the ring, pull up a chair and let's do this together. Everyone welcome 🙂☕️🧃

The DJ2022 Wagon creaks to a start in just 4 days, but always stops for latecomers 🙂

Thank you!

I'm feeling better than I expected so far this evening. Like another poster, I'm sticking to easy food, so no long cooking times, tonight is soup and garlic bread.
I bought a fever tree ginger ale earlier, so having that with ice and it's surprisingly nice

@Greatly you are so wise! Love your thinking on being able to enjoy the drink healthily. But your description of eating seafood in a French brasserie totally made me crave one even more 😂 And well done on avoiding the rosé, iron willpower there. Glad to hear I'm not the only one who thinks AF are dear :)

I looked online at some AF drinks and they were more expensive than my regular bottle of vodka!

I’ve been drinking lemon and ginger tea. Off to the supermarket today. They have sparkling mineral waters lightly flavoured with something or other for a couple of dollars. That’ll do :)

Day 6 for me. I got through Friday night but have bitten my fingernails whilst watching movie. Reminder to self….find fidget toy

Well done everyone for getting this far. Really helping hearing how everyone else is doing.

Well I had a glass of red wine. I had the absolute day from hell. DC1 who has ASD and ADHD has spent the last 2 days abusing me. I have been sworn at repeatedly, screamed at, called an idiot and stupid more times than I can count, being threatened to be punched by him and had things thrown at me. He has hit his younger brother repeatedly and I have spent the day trying to keep dc2 and DC3 away from him to protect them. I am exhausted mentally, physically and emotionally.

DH came home from work to a barrage of abuse from dc1. We have no family support as my mum and step dad work a lot and live too far away to help and MIL is only interested in the girls in his family. I sat interested what I mean is obsessed and the males get ignored generally. His dad doesn't like kids (or can't be bothered anymore as he is an old man which is fair enough as at least he is honest about it). We have a fabulous Personal assistant that takes dc1 out in term time plus a few days in the summer holidays. Outwith that we get no break from him ever. He can't go to clubs or activities as he can't cope or they cants cope with him. He won't even go out at the moment but is back to school on Mon though staff strikes mean school closure on Tuesday. DC2 was also playing up today as dc1 targets him. Dc3 was in great form thankfully.

However on a positive note I definitely noticed my drinking has slowed down and I am enjoying every sip and having water in between which is were I wanted to get back too. Sorry if anyone thinks I failed dry January but I am just getting through today though I have zero intention of getting drunk.

Sorry that's meant to read FIL doesn't like kids

@Fundays12

I don't think that anyone would say you have failed. It sounds like an incredibly stressful situation that you are dealing with. I have one teen with ASD / ADHD and the last few years have been the hardest I have ever had to deal with- and it's not as stressful as yours sounds. But it is the reason that my alcohol consumption has been through the roof the last few years.

If your aim is to get a better grip on your alcohol consumption then you are already achieving that. You are also dealing with a really hard situation so please do not add any feelings of having 'failed' (you haven't) or thinking you might be judged on here.

That’s a great start. Thinking about the money side if really helping here. We used to pop to the shop almost every night so I reckon so far we’ve saved over £50 on drink and goodness knows how much more by not buying loads of snacky junk to go with it.

Sorry you are having such a tough time @Fundays12, you are doing amazingly well holding lots of things together and nobody is going to think you have failed in this

I have gone to bed early again as it just feels boring and frustrating not having a drink on a Friday, even though I feel stupid and childish for thinking that. Hopefully will be in a better mood in the morning.

Oh @Fundays12 that really really sounds tough. No way is that a failure - more like a huge achievement for only having one glass I'd say.

I also have a teen with ASD/ADHD and whilst nowhere near as difficult as your situation sounds, and as much as I love him, parenting him is a constant source of worry and anxiety. As @lemonsaretheonlyfruit says this is also one of the reasons why my drinking has crept up and up in recent years. I didn't even attempt DJ last year as DS1 was doing uni applications and approaching A levels and my stress levels were through the roof.

Hope you have a better day tomorrow.

Well day 6 is nearly done...I have managed to avoid wine tonight but feel completely flat about it being the weekend. It's like I have nothing to look forward to. Which is pathetic really.

@Justgivemehotchocolate the money side is really motivating for me too. I forgot about all the food - I have spent so much money on takeaways when drunk.

@Fundays12 that sounds like such a difficult situation and no one could blame you for having a drink. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you and that you stick with us!

Thanks for the support I really appreciate it. I hope your doing ok. Its very difficult to deal with and it's also been the hardest few years of my life too. Lockdown has been hugely detrimental to us as a family.
Me and DH both often feel isolated at times. It's definitely been a factor in us both drinking more. The lack of family support isn't nice and I can't imagine ever not helping my dcs but equally I would rather my kids were kept away from DH family dramas and favouritism (as would he).

My goal was to gain more control and go back to a couple of glasses of wine at the weekend rather than 4 nights a week.

@Fundays12 you haven’t failed. I also have a ds with asd and adhd and can echo everything @lemonsaretheonlyfruit wrote.

Thanks everyone I really appreciate the support. Tomorrow is a new day and I am working which I am looking forward too as it feel likes a break. I think me and DH will have date night tomorrow night at home once the DC's are in bed. We don't really get out much so try have a meal together once a week ourselves without kids.

Holy shit @Fundays12 no way have you failed, having to deal with all that, I'm in awe of you holding things together as well as you have. You're doing so well. Hope you sleep well tonight and have a better day tomorrow.

I almost opened a bottle of wine tonight but I've come to bed with a new (charity shop) book and looking at Amazon stuff I need for my holiday. Just got tomorrow and Sunday to get through....

Day 6 here also thought drank some 0% wine bought from local wine shop rather than the supermarket. I’m sorry to fundays12 the stress your child is causing. My youngest has been recently diagnosed asd and adhd. Is not quite a teen yet and the behaviour is becoming more obvious. They don’t like to be alone so means one of us has to be in same room for sleeping. The most recent thing is lighting matches on the sly which is our most recent worry even though they say they wouldn’t do anything stupid🙄. We’ve had to hide the matches for this reason. It is stressful and I hope the behaviour doesn’t start to get worse in teenager dom.

any way - well done all. I’m now on my second book for reading. I’ve sadly not read a book from start to finish in I don’t know how long. They say you get a lot of time back not drinking!

off for an afternoon tea tomorrow. Trick I think is to find what you used to love doing and go out and do it again!! Night all

@Fundays12 not failing DJ at all in my opinion

I managed another dry day , in the rain
Managed a walk , popped to Tesco ( shopping much cheaper when there’s no wine in the trolley ) ….and booked a week self catering in the Canaries in 3 weeks time
busy day !

@Fundays12 I also have a teen with ASD and ADHD. You haven't failed. 💐

Checking in, read back a bit, no shame for @Fundays12 can totally relate.
Managed so far, almost cracked as it's Friday! Got as far as putting a bottle in the fridge.
We have a big 'do' mid Jan and I'm not going to make myself stick to it, but I do think it will be much easier to just have two glasses rather than the awful fuzzy drinking all night not drunk just blurry and tired. Might stick to beer actually.

@Fundays12 That sounds like a horrendous day. You did well to stop atone glass - that’s amazing self control just there. You haven’t failed at all. Hope things improve and tomorrow is better x

You're doing great!! Doubt many of us will be perfect the entire month. Don't let one glass put you off your stride.

Aargh, I was so on track, then work went crazy; and my kids dad was a bit of a knob, and it was Friday, and I caved.

i just need to not repeat tonight’s errors

@Fundays12 quite frankly in your position I wouldn't have even fucking contemplated starting DJ - so massive kudos for you for taking on something incredibly challenging, even in the midst of challenging circumstances. Don't beat yourself up at all!

@Fundays12 that all sounds extraordinary stressful. Don’t feel bad. You did well stopping at 1! And well done for slowly enjoying your drink rather than glugging it down like I probably would have.

Likewise @Findyourneutralspace don’t feel bad. Stress relief and Friday drinking are so embedded in our drinking culture it’s not surprising you caved last night. Sending you positive vibes for today!

My aim is to go for the whole of Jan without a drink, but I decided at the start to allow myself 4 “drinking sensibly” days that I can use throughout the month. This was partly to make it all feel less daunting, but also because I know if I do slip up I’ll find it easier to get back on track if I’m still within my rules.

Good luck to everyone today. Looks like it’s king to be a bit of a grim one weather wise.