I’m not looking for sympathy, but what would you do/have you done in this situation?
I have/had two long term friends one for 23 years and other for 9 years. They aren’t connected and have never met. When friends have been and gone they have been there regardless. Over time it became me putting all the effort and communication into the friendships. If I didn’t text then I wouldn’t hear from them. For a year or so I have slowed down on this to see if they’d make effort themselves, unfortunately they haven’t so I stopped too. I had occasional text messages asking how I and my family were, I’d reply, they’d read the message and not respond. Days later I’ll hear from them, but they won’t even open my reply for weeks at a time. I know I haven’t done anything to upset them or offend them. It’s been almost 2 months and I haven’t spoken to either of them much at all because I’m not texting every few days like I used to.
I find it sad as I valued both friendships in separate ways and never thought either of them would do this. It makes me feel like I am a bad person or friend and this is why it’s happened. My partner has been my rock and fills the void that is missing from lack of friendships and socialising, but I know it’s not realistic to rely on him to fill that need. It’s lonely, the only person I have to speak to beside my partner is my children and cousin, which isn’t quite the same.
I feel like the right thing to do would be to wipe the slate clean as such, and end the friendship completely, as in block and move on so there isn’t an option to let them back in. My partner comments how I check my phone to see if I have a message from either of them and that it’s affecting me more than I admit. I feel if I give up completely and they do one day get in touch then I’ve removed that choice because I’m unhappy with the lack of contact right now.
So now I’ve explained, would you cut contact entirely or would you keep the door open?