How to explain I don’t want alcohol without being rude?

[ohmygoditshappening]

Staying at a relative’s for Christmas .

I’m on valium - 2mg 3x a day - for CPTSD, MH team and GP said they strongly recommended it while away from home - and sedating antidepressant, and GP has strongly advised I don’t drink. I don’t drink much anyway, I don’t like alcohol that much and I don’t like the effect it has on me at all - it hits me like a ton of bricks, so I’m quite happy on lemonade.

Last night there was talk of a cocktail bar, gin, wine, liqueurs, all sorts .

IF I was in my own home with trusted friends, I’d probably have a very small glass - or tbh at home I wouldn’t be on valium - but I’m 200 miles from home, don’t know family that well and I don’t want to risk a Bridesmaids ‘reaaaady to paaaarty’ style episode !!

Can I just say I don’t want a glass without looking rude? It’s not even like I’m driving so can’t use that excuse .

It's not rude unless you make it so, as in "No thanks, I'll have a soft drink" versus "fuck off, give me a soft drink".

It's never rude to refuse alcohol, it's only rude to push it on people.

In your case, I'd just say 'No thank you, the doctor has said I shouldn't drink with the medication I'm on'.

yes, it is not rude to say you do not want to drink alkohol.

cocktails mean that there are tasty alkohol free mixers. just make yourself a virgin cocktail.

Yes I agree with above poster I would say I can't drink with the medication I'm on and leave it at that. They shouldn't say a single word about it after that I would think! x

Virgin cocktails all the way, I think they taste much better.
But "Can I have a lemonade please" is not rude it's what you want.

Do you really think they'd be upset if you said no? Most people wouldn't be if you say you're not drinking because of your meds. And if they make a fuss, they're not very nice people

Never been an issue for me.
I just say no thanks I don’t drink, can I please have.. .. choice of soft drink.
The end.

I occasionally get someone who is curious and asks why, I just say i can’t handle the hangovers so don’t drink at all.
That tends to shut them up as I don’t want to go into a whole boring thing about my health and all that jazz as it brings the happy mood way way down and makes it a little too much about me which I am extremely uncomfortable with.

So hangover bollocks works well usually.

Can I just say I don’t want a glass without looking rude?

Of course you can-you can drink what you like.

I wouldn’t literally say, ‘I don’t want a glass of that’ as that does sound rude, but you can say, ‘can I have a lemonade please-I can’t drink on the medication I’m taking’.

I would say that I can't drink on the medication, because I wouldn't want to risk someone putting a bit of alcohol in my soft drink.

There's no need to justify why you don't drink alcohol and reveal medical information about yourself.

Just say no thanks I'd like a soft drink.

I'd just say I can't drink at all.

A good excuse could be gout if you don't want to go down the medication route.

It causes much hilarity as people associate with being an ancient disease with Henry 8th quaffing port and gobbling pheasants and is a great diversion. In fact it's incredibly painful. Just need to google a back story.

Much better than saying I'm on amytriplyline for back pain.

Am wondering if OP might not want to mention medication if she doesn't know them that well

But anyway it's fine just to say "I'll have a lemonade please" or "I'd love an orange juice and tonic thanks"

If they ask if you want an alcoholic drink then a simple no thanks is fine

No thanks, lemonade for me, please.

No, it's fine, I'd rather have lemonade, please. Have you tried the Fentiman's Rose one? It's lovely.

Oh, that's a shame. I sure you can have fun without me doing shots and dancing on the table singing Wilkommen, Bienvenue, Welcome from Cabaret by nine thirty.

Oh dear, I've just had a text that there's a burst pipe in my flat. I'm going to need to go back home, just as well I hadn't had a drink; lovely to see you all, Happy Christmas, have a great time RUN AWAY.

I’d just say alcohol doesn’t agree with my drugs. The simple truth is always easiest.

bad show if it is rude to say No to alcohol

imo

Just say you don’t want one and stick to lemonade. Why is that rude? Will your friends put you under pressure to drink?

... and I would add "You won't believe how far I can vomit" 🤮😱

To be fair that would be understood, as a child I was heavy lactose intolerant and knackered two of said relative’s spare rooms so they might well understand that one !!!!

I did ask last night if I could just stick to lemonade or water, I’d be happiest with that, see how we go today . There’ll be more people today - and a few of them will be driving I think - so it’ll be less obvious I’m not drinking !

Just say "I'm not drinking thankyou. Orange juice is fine".

When anybody offers you anything you don't want ..... booze, gifts, a lift, a job, physical contact... there is nothing rude in politely refusing. " No thankyou".

If they are rude enough to persist; you still don't owe them any explanation.
"I already told you, no thankyou."

Surely you just say ‘oh yes I’d love a xxx but just one’ then quietly hold on to it all evening / and tip down the sink when no one is watching, or swap glasses for an empty one.

I don’t drink alcohol because I don’t like the after effect and I found that the older I got, the less I could tolerate it. People always try to persuade me , but I’m quite happy with decent flavoured tonic water or juice.

Just say it makes you unwell and you don’t drink alcohol.

Just say "no thank you, I'll stick to soft drinks"

I have a dear friend, they do not drink out of choice, they still come out on nights out with us. We make no drama at all whatsoever that they don't drink. It's their choice. Plus the round is cheaper as a coke is a third of the price of a alcoholic drink 🤣

Just say no thank you, you’re an adult why should you need to explain yourself.

Isn't it twisted how acceptable it is for others to persuade people to drink alcohol, so much so they need a "valid" excuse so as not to appear rude, yet it's seen as unthinkable to persuade others to not drink alcohol? You'd think it should be the other way round...weird world.

OP, unless they've always known you to drink, there's no reason to state why you can't have alcohol. Just politely decline and ask for something else instead, like you'd do with everything else in the world.

Yep very weird world, this country fetishises drinking.
Yet not smoking or drugs..