Am I supposed to hate Julia? (Motherland)

[BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz]

I'm about 4 episodes in (season one), and honestly - I find her and, more specifically, her husband, so fucking annoying that I may just have to throw the towel in.

I get that she is supposed to be a harangued mother, feckless dad, etc, but she is just so incredibly unlikeable.

She berates her mother, so cruelly, for stepping back on childcare (creating a gap the wanker dad should be helping to fill), sometimes in front of her mothers friends.

She only ever does stuff with or for her kids because other people have basically played on her massive insecurities. But it's at caricature point now, where its losing any humour.

I'm just not finding the comedy at all with her. I'm wondering if the fact that there isn't even a drop of niceness written into her character means we are supposed to dislike her?

I'm only still watching for Anne and Liz. Even Kevin - they made him a bit funny at the start but it's going a bit slapstick (the wearing all the coats scene?)

I want to get it, and I want to like it, and there bits I like. But it just feels so over over the top. Like they've ramped up any potential for a bit of comedy to just levels of ridiculousness.

Of all the characters in Motherland - Julia was my least favourite.

@BobSacamono mine is Meg! I liked her at first but she’d absolutely do my tree in. She’s great with Amanda though. I’d like a Kevin in my life tbh

Well to be fair Motherland a) is a tv programme and b) shows next to no parenting. It’s mentioned and it’s obvious from the context that it’s happening but it isn’t in any way a focus of the show. So that’s probably why it looks easier.

🤣
Spoken as someone who doesn't have teenagers! They do all kinds of stupid, risky, hair raising things plus they think you are stupid and ignorant if you try to explain why wild swimming in the filthy dock/ drinking a quarter bottle of vodka in 15 minutes/ meeting "a boy" you have only spoken to online in a local park for a sleepover in a tent/ sending photos of yourself naked to a boy you fancy/ taking a parents car for a joyride in the middle of the night when you are 15/ smoking weed before your exams (delete or add as appropriate)
These are all things that teens of my acquaintance have done and that's just what I know about.

Teenager motherland would be perfect. Manus could have a pregnancy scare with Ivy for example.

Teens is really easy as a stage. Do you live in some kind of urban or rural dystopia @AdamRyan ? Sure there are occasional dramas but no need to get stressed about it.

I was one of those people. My point was that when I get to watch a bit of telly I don't want to be presented with an exaggerated version of my own life - that's just not entertaining. I'm sure it will be marvellously nostalgic for me in ten years.

Best is Amanda. She is just so sad and I just want to hug her because she's so unhappy

The sports day episode is brilliant and just excruciating. Amanda is so so desperate to pretend everything with Johnny is fine. Trying to make him happy when he clearly doesn't want her anymore. Then the others see her house for sale online and she doesn't know and then Johnny tells her they're getting a divorce. It's just awful

Is this the dumbest post ever?

Haven't read the whole thread sorry but why does a sitcom protagonist need to be likeable? Do you think Del Boy is a great bloke? Alan Partridge? David Brent? Norman Stanley Fletcher? Jerry Seinfeld? Why are women characters expected to be likeable and heroic and sympathetic?

Arctic do you have teens?! If so you are likely one of those oblivious parents whose teens never tell them anything!

LOL.

I go from being irritated by Julia in one episode, to 'can't get enough of her' in the next. Its her gritted teeth smile that irritates me most.
Love Anne, Kevin & Liz.
Detest Amanda, Julia's husband and the school's receptionist.
Julia's PIL are hysterical....love the fish restaurant episode 😆

I have 3 teens. Tbh it just doesn't stress me out and is a pretty easy life stage.

I think Julia's a really well-written character. At first she seems like quite an irritating person but as the show progresses we see more and more of how and why she's become like that. In the 3rd series it becomes clear that she's undervalue and put upon at work as well as getting no real support from her DH. From her comments about her crippling mortgage/her desperation to try to get her DC in to the 'right' school and the way her job goes I think the younger Julia probably thought if she worked hard she could have it all. Now she's finding that she has what she thought she wanted (DH, DC, nice house, career etc) but responsibility for keeping all the plates spinning comes down on her. I actually felt really sorry for her in the Builder episode- she obviously really missed having someone around her who was really kind to her. I felt irrationally angry when she just seemed to simper at the end when her useless arsehole DH gave her the slightest bit of attention.

I am clearly overthinking this massively, but based on people I know irl I imagine the younger Julia as someone who worked hard and played hard, ended up with a DH that she thought was a bit of a catch and thought she had her life sorted. Her DH probably told her he'd take his share of looking after the DC etc but then when they arrived always had some excuse not to do anything/claimed she did it all better etc.

yeah, I had no problems breastfeeding but wouldn't respond to someone having issues with "it's a doddle, don't know why you are stressed out about it. It's so easy - what are you in a dystopia?"

Because of this thread I decided to give Motherland a go. I've watched the first two episodes so far - and I have to agree with a lot of what's already been said so far. I don't think Julia is supposed to be likeable. And I don't relate to her at all, but I do find her and the show funny. She's like Larry David from Curb Your Enthusiasm. In that she's the architect of the vast majority of her misfortunes and problems. I also saw all the Mumsnets archetypes represented too - the people pleaser, the pushover, the queen Bee and obviously Julia is the ultimate CF. She's entitled and completely and lacks any sort of self awareness and is completely obvious to her failings.

I was more offering a counterbalance to that poster pissing all over the chips of the person saying they find toddlerhood a struggle by saying it just gets worse, not better.

But whatevz, sure, it's a nightmare when they are young and only gets worse as they steal cars and sleep with strangers in tents in a park. Totally what the teen years are like.

So .. parents of toddlers ... enjoy the good times, they'll be shooting up heroin with crack addicts by the time they are 14.

I think she’s supposed to be unlikeable, definitely don’t think the character was created to win the audience’s hearts. I’m Northern and loved it personally, found parts of most characters relatable.

I do think it's shit when people wade in and do this ... 'You have no idea what is coming', schtick, regardless of which stage they are referring to - and crowbarring it onto a thread about a TV show is unnecessarily mean spirited.

Fwiw, my teens are a breeze.

Teens aren't harder. The difficulties are just different ones. Some teens are extremely difficult, while others are easy peasy. Just like small children.

Though maybe don't listen to me, I just watched Episode 1 (the pilot) and found Kevin very attractive. And yes I mean very. (Didn't in Episode 2 though sadly. Not sure what the difference was.)

Here’s a little nugget of wisdom for you to carry through your life.

<drum roll>

Sometimes other people’s experiences are different to yours.

You’re so welcome

Unless you have 19yo triplets at least a couple of them are young enough to change that overnight at any given moment. And many, many teens do

I do agree with this.

People say it to tired, stressed and low mums who have newborns and are barely still walking properly from the birth. “It just gets harder!”. Mine are nearly 6 and nearly 10. This is WAY easier than newborn and toddler years. For me it is anyway. I have no idea what the teens years will be like but I can safely say I never look back at the hell that was the baby and toddler stage

You need to watch it all to see what Anne says about him!
(I was very surprised 😮)

I don't think teens are harder than toddlers- it's all hard, just in new and different ways!
I was responding to the person saying teenagers are a breeze unless they have disability or health problems! With a list of hair raising things teens of my acquaintance have done. (Some, but not all, mine)