Breastfeeding help!

[FirstBaba]

Hi all - any advice/ideas much appreciated
My LO is 6 weeks old and EBF. Within the last week he has begun to wake for his feed as normal around 7/8pm but from this time until 1.30am he wants to be attached to my nipple!

I have been worried about my milk supply in the evening time so have been expressing all day and tonight gave him a bottle. This helped as it meant I knew he wasn't "hungry" as such and he also wasn't on my breast for the full duration of this period. He is very persistent to get on to my breast and, using tonight as an example, he doesn't feed when there but seems to be using me as a dummy or for comfort. Despite looking like he's asleep at this point, if I try to put him down he is wide awake in seconds.

Just wondering if anyone has any words of wisdom on what is happening really? He will absolutely not go down to sleep unless he has been at my nipple for hours on end and eventually passes out due to exhaustion.

This is tough, but completely normal behaviour and it doesn't mean there's an issue with your supply. It's called cluster feeding. Baby is probably going through a growth spurt.
And baby doesn't use you as a dummy. Dummies are created to replicate the nipple, not the other way around. Using breastfeeding for comfort is what babies are designed to do. I recommend trying to cosleep or doing shifts with your partner if you have one. Don't worry, like any growth spurt, it'll pass.

Search for side lying breastfeeding position. It takes a bit of practice (at least it took a lot for me) but it's so helpful to get more rest for you.

I agree with @ChildcareIsBroken . Although my DS is now a gorgeous 11 yo, I do have vivid memories of him wanting to be attached to my boob at every opportunity. It was excruciating and you have my sympathies as it is exhausting. I just gave up trying to fix it until he was ready to come off. Your baby is too little to do any sort of training yet, and so find positions that work for you. Best of luck OP. It will pass.

Cluster feeding is absolutely right and your baby is actually trying to build their supply so it’s important you actually let him feed as much as he wants, rather than expressing in order to bottle feed him during this time: the more he feeds, from your breast, the more your breasts will get the message that they need milk - and this will help establish how much milk they need to make in future to satisfy him. Think of it like him “putting his order in”. It IS a really tough time - exhausting and mentally a bit frustrating. But it’s entirely normal. Try to do whatever you can to get through it - whether that’s going to bed and (safely) cosleeping so he can just feed constantly lying down, or sitting down to a few box sets and a ton of snacks. When he’s an active toddler rushing around, you’ll look back wistfully at being able to sit around holding him and watching tv! You can do this!!

Give him an actual dummy?

Yes. This is completely normal (and absolutely knackering). But: it won’t last forever.

Six weeks in here as well and the exact same. My first was the same and it tapered off around 10-12 weeks.

First time round I worried about it a lot and was exhausted. This time round I've prioritised mastering side feeding in bed so I can at least get some rest while she cluster feeds all she likes. It doesn't last forever but it is bloody hard work.

Thank you all for your replies. They've been reassuring. I suppose I'm just panicked a bit by people saying I'm creating "bad habits" and that he will always need to suckle for hours to get him to sleep if i let him do it now. Although I know in my heart it's far too soon for any of that and a lot of it is for comfort at this early stage.

Is it definitely cluster feeding? Most of what I read online seems to allude to baby feeding very regularly over a few hours whereas my LO is literally attached continually for those 4-5 hours and for the most part he isn't actually feeding, more fluttering!

Thanks for the side-laying tips, I would love to try this but unfortunately he has silent reflux and can only manage about 5mins sleeping flat because he starts to cough and struggle with what appears to be acid coming up his throat.

I know these times pass far too quickly but it's absolutely exhausting and I get absolutely nothing else done with my day lol!

Six week growth spurt. Brutal.

But this was the point my supply regulated, so once you're through to the other side you'll hopefully notice you don't get engorged before every feed and things will all become easier.

Totally normal as everyone has said. It the 6 week clusterfeeding clusterfuck.

This is what worries me. I was only ever engorged for the middle of the night (4am) and early morning feeds (7/8am). Through the day my boobs felt fuller but not engorged - and from the evening on they felt totally empty. It's so confusing. He was also extremely fussy at the nipple and actually pulling himself off and crying like he was hungry in the later evening and I felt that this was because I had 'ran out' of milk and he was still hungry :(

This is probably a silly question but how long does it last?

Just wanted to give reassurance that my baby was exactly the same. She would feed for hours and I felt like it would never get better. I thought people were lying when they told me it would. It does get better and it does get easier. My baby is 16 weeks now and is SO much better. She goes a couple of hours between feeds in the daytime and night times were great (sleeping 8-6) but she has hit the regression so that's gone to pot! In the daytime, she will be rocked to sleep and doesn't rely on me. It's perfectly normal what you are describing - breastfeeding is so much more than feeding - it's comfort and closeness too. Can you Co-sleep and feed lying down?

Also just to reassure you that your boobs are never empty. Think of the milk supply like a river - constant flow although sometimes it might be slower. Babies usually get more frustrated in the evening as the flow is usually slower, my baby used to cry, hit and pull on my boobs every evening from around 4pm and it was hard. My boobs have never leaked during the day and have never felt full apart from when she started to sleep all night.

It’s normal and will sort itself out. I would advise not pumping as well because it may up your supply more than is needed, and also it’s boring and tiring and a pain in the neck!

at this stage your job is basically getting all the calories in yourself so you can cope with your little mammary vampire getting all the calories out all the flipping time! If he’s your first and you don’t have other children to look after, find some good series to binge-watch and just settle into it. It does pass, promise!

PS: you won’t get him into bad habits. You’ll form a secure attachment which means more independence and confidence for him later - all good! (If knackering, and hard on your nipples)

This is absolutely normal. And the fact your breasts are getting softer is a very good sign. It means your supply should regulate soon. Think of it as a river not a lake. While your breasts are soft they continue to produce milk, your body is learning how much to produce.
And cluster feeding has many forms. I had similar experience to yours.
Does your baby have plenty wet nappies? Does your baby gain weight? If yes to both, you have nothing to worry about.
The only thing I'd check is latch. Silent reflux can be caused by latch that's not optimal. Do you get any pain or discomfort?
But also some reflux is common at this age, so possibly your latch is perfect and hopefully reflux will pass soon.

This all sounds so normal and so tiring! My mum still talks about how I used to feed from 6pm till midnight while she watched movie after move on VHS and that was 40 years ago!

As other have said your baby is cluster feeding to regulate your milk supply to its needs. Do look at mastering side lying feeding (it gets easier as the baby gets bigger) or just settle in with all the snacks and something easy on TV.

As for how long, I think about 12/16 weeks you will find things have eased off a lot.

I guess you’d know by now, but he doesn’t have tongue tie?

@ChildcareIsBroken @Shitfather he does have a slight tongue tie, but I was told nothing would be done because he is gaining great weight and having very very regular wet and regular dirty nappies.
His latch is smaller than I've seen in pics but he seems to get plenty and I have no discomfort yet

I did ask the GP about it causing reflux and she strongly rubbished the notion and said it's due to an underdeveloped valve letting stomach acid out, which will fix itself as he continues to develop :/

If he has reflux and is feeding a lot for comfort, it could be that the breastmilk is soothing his stomach pain. My DD did this and it turned out to be a cow milk allergy so I had to eliminate it from my diet.

Tongue tie can absolutely cause reflux. Also more disturbed nights (it doesn't mean realising will definitely help with that but it might). I'd look for second opinion. Can you go private for the TT? It's not even about the tie itself but the mouth function with the tie, so the proper assesment needs to be done by a specialist.
I recommend finding more info here: www.instagram.com/gentle_births_and_beyond/?hl=en

Unfortunately NHS in many areas doesn't take TT as seriously as they should based on NICE guidance.

Where would I go for private consultation? A pediatrician?

Best to look here:
www.tongue-tie.org.uk/find-a-practitioner/

Update*
He slept last night from 1.30am until 5.30 then went down again until 9am.
He has been wide awake since and cluster feeding again today ... I am genuinely worried about him. Surely it's not normal for a 6 week old to be awake for almost 12hrs with only 1/2 an hour nap? 😓

Oh, it's tough I know...

Isn't he dosing off while cluster feeding? That counts as a nap too.