Breastfeeding help!

[FirstBaba]

Hi all - any advice/ideas much appreciated
My LO is 6 weeks old and EBF. Within the last week he has begun to wake for his feed as normal around 7/8pm but from this time until 1.30am he wants to be attached to my nipple!

I have been worried about my milk supply in the evening time so have been expressing all day and tonight gave him a bottle. This helped as it meant I knew he wasn't "hungry" as such and he also wasn't on my breast for the full duration of this period. He is very persistent to get on to my breast and, using tonight as an example, he doesn't feed when there but seems to be using me as a dummy or for comfort. Despite looking like he's asleep at this point, if I try to put him down he is wide awake in seconds.

Just wondering if anyone has any words of wisdom on what is happening really? He will absolutely not go down to sleep unless he has been at my nipple for hours on end and eventually passes out due to exhaustion.

Yes but really not for long. And not sleepy enough not to know immediately as soon as he falls off the nipple.

I think the sleep deprivation is making me worry that there's something wrong with him... Or my milk

If he's gaining weight then there's nothing wrong. And sleep deprivation is awful, I feel your pain.

"And not sleepy enough not to know immediately as soon as he falls off the nipple."
Yeah, that's completely normal. At this age they don't go into deep sleep yet. And our naps were almost exclusively on the boob. Every bit of sleep counts.

This all sounds very normal OP please don't worry. You're doing a smashing job, and I know it's really hard. One thing I found when mine were doing the flutter sucking while asleep and would then fall off the nipple and wake themselves up - get the back of their head settled into the crook of your arm as they're still flutter sucking. Then gently unlatch them with the little finger of your other hand, and immediately pull their head into your boob using tue crook of your arm so their mouth is pushed into the fleshy part of your boob and bob/rock them gently, I found this would make mine fall back asleep without a nip!

@ChildcareIsBroken @wibblewobbleball thank you both very much, honestly, it has helped me to even have someone to talk to about this as none of my friends BF.
Here's hoping it doesn't last for weeks or I think I'll crash lol 😅

It all sounds quite normal. Make sure you are drinking and eating enough. I do remember when my first was about that age that my husband went to work as I was sat on the sofa breastfeeding. He returned 9 hours later and I was in the same spot… (though I had managed to nip to the loo and also get snacks and drinks very quickly!). It’ll get better within a week or two!

Thank you to all you other ladies too, this has been really reassuring for me.

@HBZ287 my word lol I just wonder how people ever get anything done. My house is going to be inhabitable if this continues much longer lol

I suppose I'm just panicked a bit by people saying I'm creating "bad habits" and that he will always need to suckle for hours to get him to sleep if i let him do it now.

Oh, bless you. He's fine, he's just doing his tiny baby thing. I was so lazy, fed to sleep, fed at every night wake up because it meant I could get back to bed quicker. It never became a drama and she learned to fall asleep on her own, she learned to stay asleep on her own.

You're doing so well, try and just snug up with films and shit TV, keep hydrated and enjoy it as much as you can.

Echoing everyone else’s advice - it sounds totally normal to me.

There’s a whole heath service “line” on BF in this country which seems to be essentially that, if you’re doing it correctly then it’s easy and a wonderful thing etc etc. while I am a fully paid up subscriber to the view that it’s a wonderful thing, I strongly believe any suggestion that it’s easy actually makes women:

a) give up/feel like failures far too early in the process, as the messaging implies that any difficulties must be down to the mother

b) really undersells the massive effort involved in EBF

If you can get anything else done during the day for the first 12 weeks then hats off to you! Always come back to mumsnet for reassurance and advice on this - loads of brilliant people with lots of experience to draw on!

recommend this book as well - she also does private consults

www.amazon.co.uk/What-Expect-When-Youre-Breastfeeding/dp/0091906962

good luck!

@Kitcaterpillar thank you, it's good to hear from someone with first hand experience!

@samqueens ns I totally agree, everything points to thus being a very easy process and I have found it anything but!

Just wondering if it's normal for him to be upset, crying and fussy when he's off the breast (for winding etc) as he's not usually a crying baby 😟

"Just wondering if it's normal for him to be upset, crying and fussy when he's off the breast (for winding etc) as he's not usually a crying baby 😟"

It's normal because breastfeeding is the most comforting thing for him right now. Have you heard of the forth trimester? He wants to be close to you like he was when you were pregnant. It's amazing and... exhausting. You're doing great and once baby is above 12 weeks it gets easier. He'll still need lots of closeness but it won't be as intense.

But also remember you know your baby best. If there's anything in his behaviour that seems off and you're worried he's sick, call your GP even if just for reassurance.

@samqueens @ChildcareIsBroken @Kitcaterpillar @wishuponastar1988 @HBZ287 @wibblewobbleball (and anyone else)
Sorry for tagging - purely for more advice.

LO has been feeding for most of the evening however tonight he has had some breaks - for a short walk and later a bath.
For the past hour he has been kind of fluttery feeding, eyes closed and looks like he's sleeping but still latched, fluttering and swallowing the odd time. Does this mean he is getting milk? Like is he actually going to get full from this or Is he going to stay hungry and on the boob all night? Sorry - find this all so confusing

You’ll find out if you try and take him off! You can use your finger to break the suction seal his mouth creates against you and see if he just comes off. If so try burping/putting down and getting a bit of sleep til he wakes again. Alternatively he’ll cotton on to what you’re doing and clamp on - in which case he’s not done so you just decide if you need a break. Sometimes they’ll resist but quickly settle because they are actually ok for now, sometimes not.

it’s not 100% about hunger, part of it is comfort - but your LO is still teeny tiny. BF is pretty much a constant activity for at least the first 12 weeks, I found, until they get big enough to go a bit longer between feeds and settle a bit in general. Hang in there - it’s hard work!

^this sounds pretty spot on to me. Usually a bf baby will cluster feed around the point of a growth spurt- its their way of telling your body to produce more to sustain them for the spurt as your milk production is reactive to baby suckling. Mine is 2 weeks old and is doing the same thing so you aren't alone, it is quite demanding and you do doubt yourself. I'm managing by asking dh to watch me co sleep for an hour or two/ incase I dose off and I've been napping during the day when baby sleeps because I know that later on he'll be glued to me for hours on end refusing to be put down. I find it easier having something to watch on TV in the background- makes the time go quicker and I feel more alert.

Babies love to sleep on the boob (toddlers, like mine, too). If you're worried LO hasn't eaten much, you can alternate breasts few times, that's a good way to speed up the feeding part. But baby still may at the end choose to sleep while slowly feeding. Like pp said you can they break suction and if you're lucky LO won't wake up.

Good luck! We did all those things too.

I don't know. I breastfed both of my babies for a loooong time and just accepted it was a hard time. I tried my best to enjoy the cuddles and just went with it. Babies love being close to mama and the smell of mum's chest/milk/skin is probably just pure bliss to them.