In hindsight, what gave you the ick? (Lighthearted)

[JorisBonson]

The other day I remembered that ex DH would turn the water r off halfway through showering, and for some reason this gave me a belated ick.
i
s trousers were always too short too.

Oh my god this is so funny 😆

These are brilliant.

I had one where he gave himself a pet name. Let's say his name was 'Dan'. He would call himself 'Dan Dans' in the third person and I physically wanted to spontaneously combust on the spot.

Just lighten up. If people want to say ick then they can, and “getting the ick” is a known thing and it isn’t getting nauseous nor does it have anything to do with your choice of career.

MN gives me the ick that you can’t ask a normal question without someone piping up with some beyond bizarre response. “It’s not a vagina it’s a vulva!” “Its not a gender reveal party it’s a sex reveal party”

Get a life.

An ex said 'a lovely little.... (insert type of wine here)'

Another i had the glass shattering moment (if anyone has seen that episode of How I Met Your Mother)
When a friend pointed out how his trousers were always halfway down his bum.

In fact, that might be a great idea for another thread!

👌

Said okie pokey instead of just ok.
Ripped out his chest hair
Wore a low v neck t-shirt
Asked if I’d ever get back with my ex, said no he’s fucked it - he responded that’s funny because he is fucking the girl he left you for.
Couldn’t drive and then smoked in my car.
Wore lime green trainers

I messaged my boyfriend to say I couldn't stay over that night. His reply:

'No fair. I wanna be inside you'

I'm now a lesbian.

He used to take olives to bed with him. I should've known he was a wrongun

For Christmas he gave me a portrait of me that he’d painted.

He told me he was a skilled swimmer. I watched him do front crawl and he breathed every other stroke, not every 3.

it was a sign.

Walked with his arms flat against his sides and his hands out at right angles and his feet at 10 to 2. I could only see him as a joke version of a penguin so he had to go.

Disclaimer: He was an annoying fucker in many other ways too.

Bounced when he walked like he was about to start skipping at any moment

Another one called his penis 'my boy' 🤢

I am wheezing Mutley style at this

Urgh did you date my ex

My ex - voting UKIP despite being fucking Polish.

My current husband - blowing his nose into his hand and licking it all up and/or wiping it on the sofa 😩

Also calling his penis 'Little (DH's name)' and making it talk to me.

I may need some better taste in men.

I should mention that the penis calls me 'mummy' on occasion and he once attached toy googly eyes to it. I think he's far more impressed with his cock than I am.

Looking back I don't know why I am actually here everything gave me the ick but he was fit and the sex was good so you know that's all ok then.... Passing wind pretty much straight after 2nd time we had sex really loudly then saying oops sorry then not caring when he does it and finding it hilarious (bleughh) picking nose in front of me, leaving fingernails all over the place, hair combed over to one side, lack of social graces in public talking so loud the whole restaurant could hear our inappropriate driven by him conversation, road rage, constant swearing, moody, misogynistic, judgemental, bit sex obsessed, air of superiority, an absolute catch in fact 🤔

My sister left her long term partner largely because he'd say 'penultimate' when he meant 'ultimate'. As in "that party was amazing! I think that's the penultimate party I've ever been to!'

She kept telling him but it never sank in.

An ex of mine used to flick his hand forward when talking in a 💅 way. He wasn't, but I just remember the sight of him post you-know-what, naked and flicking his hand forward enthusiastically 🤢

Still makes me shudder

Oh yes chewing the tie strings to a hoody man child grow up

ExDH not saying is there anything to eat like a normal person but ‘is there anything to munch?’
I hate that word!

I once (and only once!) hooked up with a guy who, after every thrust, would look at me expectantly with his eyebrows raised and a big smile, as if he expected praise. It was seriously off-putting

Showed up to a date wearing bright red skinny jeans.

"My current husband - blowing his nose into his hand and licking it all up and/or wiping it on the sofa 😩" @Whichwhatnow

Actually what, now? 🤔
my two year old wouldn't dream of doing this! 🤢 Please say he's a STBEx...

He couldn't keep his hands off me in public. We'd be in a bar and he'd grab my bum or touch my arm and it was CONSTANT to the point where it was embarrassing.