How on earth can I go back to work?

[DarlingBudsofMay1]

I am a freelancer. I do a highly skilled but unfortunately low paid job in the field of linguistics (partly because I work for clients in a poor country, partly because there are many amateurs who pose as professionals and drive down rates across the industry).
I had a baby 4 months ago, and receive maternity allowance from the government until March. I would quite like to work part time once my mat pay ends, but I'm just not sure how I can possibly make this work. We depend on my husband's salary - mine is just extra to pay for things like the food shopping.

My work is very sporadic: sometimes I receive tonnes of work, other times nothing at all for weeks. This means I could book childcare and end up with no work to do to make it pay off. Let's say I arrange for a childminder 2 hours a day on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Well it could be that that week I receive projects on Thursday and Friday. And even if I do have work to do, as it's not very well paid I would be working for a pittance after childcare fees. I don't have any relatives nearby to help. I don't have any "retainer" type projects to fall back on if I don't have work. Without a baby, it was an ideal job because I just took whatever projects I wanted whenever they came up. But organising this particular job around childcare just seems impossible. She's also the type of baby who needs constant reassurance and entertaining. If I so much as turn my back to her she starts crying. So I can't simply put her in a playpen to amuse herself while I work.
I'm starting to think I should just give up on the idea and be a stay at home mum. I wouldn't mind terribly, it's just that this bit of extra money is very very useful, and I do really enjoy my job.

Please tell me if you can think of any obvious solutions that I'm not seeing.

Don’t panic - you can use sitters.co.uk you can’t do it short notice, but you can book online and they’re vetted. Gym would also be a good option and you can tax deductible it on your tax return.

You say you like your work, but it is sporadic and not well paid.

Do you have a plan for a proper career? Because I would concentrate my efforts on facilitating this, rather than work for pin money for years to come.

As I said some of us have managed to hold down full time jobs without sacrificing family time (3-7 with the kids every day and all day weekends) and retain our marriage. It’s not easy and I am tired but I love my job, I am very proud of my professional achievements. It’s not an either/or situation. And the reason it’s possible is that DH sees me as an equal and sees my career as equally valuable and not just in monetary terms (even as a doctor he earns 3 times what I do…).

I think it’s pretty normal to work in the evenings once the kids are in bed (isn’t it??). DH and I do most evenings Mon-Thurs. I’m an academic (so did this, plus weekends which I rarely do now, even before kids - cos that’s what academics do) and DH works freelance around school hours (he does the school pick ups and afternoon parenting and then does 2 or 3 hrs work after 8pm). His work can often be done in front of the TV! Mine less so…

Our marriage is doing pretty well I think (19 years so far!) and DC have got to ripe ages of 9 & 7 without seeming too scarred by our working arrangements.

You’re putting up obstacles before you got started working. the thing is you need to work when the work is available, and that’s potentially evening and weekend. It’s achievable to work and have a happy relationship,plenty folk manage it

If I couldn’t find a sitter who could fulfil the need for sporadic childcare then I’d just be a stay at home mum until my LO was older.
there are a million and one ways to earn small amounts of money from a computer. If it’s just food and extras you’re covering I’m pretty sure there’s a way you can do it from home, especially with your skills in linguistics.

I'm also self-employed and I'm going to suggest that you look at this from another perspective - you don't so much have a childcare problem as have a business problem.

Your issue is really that the work you get is sporadic and you aren't being paid what you are worth (which is causing your childcare headache). If you like what you do and don't want to change that, have you considered what you might be able to do to improve your work pipeline and make it more regular and sustainable (therefore funding the childcare)? That might be working on attracting new clients, or thinking how you can transfer your skills to offering other, related, services alongside whatever it is you do now. I don't know what you do, but just as an example taken from your OP, it might sound counter-intuitive but do these "amateurs" need training from a professional? Or maybe your skills can be used in a different way / in a different sector.

It might be worth having a couple of sessions with a business coach to get help and think about what might work. It doesn't sound as though you need the money immediately, so you would have time to develop a strategy and build up your work. In the short term, that will probably mean sacrificing evenings and weekends but in the longer term could work out well if you have a more sustainable business that could see you through the next few years and work around school hours in the future.