A bit disillusioned with holidays- is it an age thing or just me?

[MakeMineADigestive]

I seem to like going away less and less, although I like a change of scene and new places. I like my own bed, my own kitchen and my own bath, regardless of how 'luxurious' the accommodation is. (We mostly do UK self catering, often combining it with long distance family who we visit.)

After 30+ years of self catering I feel I've now had enough of sleeping in beds that aren't my own (and always too soft), kitchens that look wonderful but are usually impractical, curtains or blinds that let in the light (waking me up at dawn) etc.

I find it almost impossible to sleep in a strange bed for at least 2 nights, and often come home feeling more tired than when I started off.

Hotels- we've had disasters with rowdy guests coming in late, shouting in corridors, TV on full volume till late and waking us up - whether it's Premier Inn or 5* luxury.

Am I just a miserable old woman or are there any kindred spirits out there?
I didn't used to be like this in my 20s and 30s and could sleep anywhere.

I’m with you! whether self catering or hotels -you have accurately listed the issues with both.

DH has been muttering about going away soon…he can go on his own as far as I’m concerned. I always come back more knackered than before we arrived.

Our last trip, pre covid, saw us coming home early because I couldn’t take one more uncomfortable night in an over soft, too small bed. I’d be happier staying home and pottering about and having a few day trips & meals out than staying somewhere else.

I have found my people @PickAgain :)

We go away quite a bit for short breaks mainly to see our elderly parents who can't put us up (not enough rooms) and every time, I come home knackered as there is always something wrong with places, even luxurious ones.

Really, I just want to be 'beamed up' to a nice location for the day, and beamed back home to get into my own bed.

I did wonder about a low-key cruise, (one with only adults) but people always end up with norovirus or covid LOL!

We all have different likes and dislikes, but what you describe isn’t a holiday to me and I couldn’t be bothered with all that faff either for little reward.

what is your type of holiday @Suprima ?

I hate flying, (but would do short haul) don't do lying on beaches, so any ideas from you would be great.

One place I did sleep ok was a villa we had in Majorca in a small town. It was cheap to eat out so no messing about in the kitchen.

Oh gosh no, I don't have this at all (age 52).

I just love the thrill of being somewhere new - or somewhere that I love that I have been to before, and sleeping in a bed I've not had to make. I wear earplugs and try to remember to bring an eye mask anyway when I go away, so I'm not disturbed by noises.

I have decided to draw the line at camping though and camper vans that have no toilet. I go to the loo at least twice a night, and the makeshift arrangements required make things rather uncomfortable for me.

I love holidays. Uk self catering not so much though.

We tend to go to hotels but if sc I don't cook.

How about investing in a motor home? You could install blackout blinds and have mattresses that suit you.

I know what you mean though. Travelling is such a palava and accommodation in the UK is often sub par. We've just had a weekend in Wales, nice cottage but so cold at night when the heating went off (not able to adjust timer), the duvet was really thin, pillows flat as pancakes and curtains that let in light. We did go on our first cruise recently which was fab, but yes we did come home with covid!

I'm not a fan of uk holidays or self catering.

I absolutely love a nice sunny holiday across through. Hotels can be hit and miss but we've found a few we love and keep returning to now.

-City breaks with easyJet flights. Book a nice hotel with a huge luxurious bed and plan a nice itinerary of galleries, museums, local eats and enjoy being in a new culture. Paris, Warsaw, Lisbon, Porto, Prague, Berlin….all a short flight away.

-Nice AIs in a resort with lots going on. Out of a week I’ll have 2 days with books poolside, chilling, then go and see local sites, boat trips, culture on the other days. Will eat out a few times too to support the locals and not feel like I am trapped in a hotel.

-my family has a holiday home somewhere warm so I’m used to self catering but the beaches, local markets and change of scenery definitely make it seem like a break from reality. If it was in West Sussex it wouldn’t quite be the same.

I’m eyeing up a cruise around the Greek islands or Italy to tick a few destinations off my bucket list as it’s a great way to do many things at once.

I have been Cornwall a few times and have enjoyed staying in houses in the UK as part of big friendship groups coming together for a group hol- but it never feels the same. Apart from when you’re out having a lovely meal (Cornwall is great for foodies…) it just feels like I’m doing the washing up in a different location.

I can’t relate at all to your post OP, I love to travel.
I have just returned from a fantastic twin centre holiday in Spain. I loved discovering Granada and Alhambra Palace more than lived up to my high expectations.
I do spend ages researching hotels that have super king size beds and that are in good locations.
I also love to cruise and may try some self catering holidays for a change.
I am 53 and am looking forward to many more travel adventures.

I’m sorry you feel like this. Personally I love going away and feel a good break is energising. Perhaps combining it with family visits is taking the edge off?

Research, research, research I say. Read the reviews really carefully and look out for comments on soft beds, poor curtains and noisy guests. That way you can hope to eliminate what you hate.

Hell no, I love them even more now I can afford better than YHA accommodation!

City breaks in U.K. or Europe, ideally by train, just me and DH.
A week somewhere beautiful in AirBnB with kids.
A museum and theatre weekend with my friends
Going to Paris, Italy or New York at the slightest opportunity
Whale watching in Scandinavia
Even Centre Parcs where the young people sod off to the pool and BBC activities all day and I chill out with a book and my binoculars for bird watching.

Thanks

I do research and we choose pretty well, considering, and there is somewhere we go back to again and again but it's a very long drive.

Hotels? Even paying a lot in the UK for a 5* we had to report noise (and got some discount) because there was a crowd of youngsters creating in the corridors.

Money is not an issue so I'm not scrimping.

Actually to be fair, I think most people in my work team are like this, to the point that I now only mention major holidays ( except to another holiday aficionado).

One has an anti holiday DW. So when I said we were off skiing to France, he asked wistfully how different it was to Scotland as he had only been skiing there. Likewise when I talked about Dubrovnik and all the amazing scenery, apparently the only holiday his DW will countenance is Florida.

Oh and I generally get great accommodation on UK breaks as I research the heck out of it and only book places with excellent guest ratings.

OP I feel exactly the same, although I never admit it in real life because people don't like it if I say it for some reason, but yes, everything you described and more! You are certainly not alone!

I'm late 50s and I feel exactly the same as the OP. We've tried hotels, Airbnb, self catering etc etc. All fall on a scale between utter crap and less comfortable than home. Hotels are always much too hot. The standard of cleaning is poor and the bedding is mostly rubbish. I wouldn't have thought it was possible to get such hard waddy pillows. If the neighbours aren't noisy then you have to put up with the recycling people tipping out vast bins of bottles at 5am. My OH calls it the inhospitality trade.

This summer we booked a cottage and found we packed ear plugs, eye masks, our own pillows, blankets, coffee maker etc etc etc and then had to clean the bathroom when we arrived. The whole place smelled of BO and the neighbour's greyhound used the garden as a lav. Will be a long time before we bother again.

Oh sorry cross post OP.
I tend to go 4 rather than 5 stars - my expectations are too high when I pay 5 star prices.
Also most of your UK travel seems to be about visiting relatives.You might find it more enjoyable if it's purely for a holiday.

I don't like self-catering, in the UK or elsewhere.

I am very noise sensitive but haven't generally had a problem with noise in hotels. It does occasionally happen eg noisy TVs or people galumping around like a herd of elephants above us. But it's not all the time.

For me the bigger problem is that hotels are always too hot and the aircon can be very hit and miss, or noisy. Or doesn't exist because the building is too old.

Have you tried B&Bs? That might resolve most of the issues. Not AirBnB - traditional B&Bs.

Your time away is not a holiday. When we visit family, I. feel the same as. you but that's. because the family visit is not a holiday regardless how much I like the people.

Holidays are. for me discovering new areas. Can be UK (expensive and you really have to search for gems) or abroad. City breaks with museum visits and just walking around. Beach holidays mixed with day trips. We currently plan the first road trip in ages for next Summer.

The only thing we now stopped doing is AI. DD is old enough not to need constant snacks and outgrew all entertainment and wants to do things compared to playing in the pool.

I do research to the nth degree. The last place we stayed at had almost 300 5* reviews on TripA, and about 4 negatives. Of those negatives only two mentioned the bed being a bit too soft. (I like a very firm bed and am beginning to think most people don't!)

I always take my own pillow ( like, evidently, the Queen did. Partly for hygiene, but also because it's comfy.) Even when we have gone overseas we take 2 portable / packable travel pillows. Weird, yes, I know.

As I said, we do have one holiday cottage that is wonderful and ticks every box, but it's a 6 hour drive.

I will rethink city breaks. We've not done any for ages, due to Covid as my DP is clinically vulnerable, and on meds, so we are super-careful.

We always research the heck out of places too and only book places that have good reviews. Either people are too kind to be rude on reviews or we are picky and unusual. I'm sure it's the latter.

I'm the same. I worry I'm losing sense of adventure and becoming a little dull (I'm not saying you are!). I do have to travel a lot because my in-laws are abroad. My DH is also obsessed with going away. I find I prefer short breaks. So if in the uk, leaving home on Saturday morning and coming back on Sunday evening. That way we have the sense of being away for the weekend but we're actually only away for one night.

I love holidays so quite the opposite, would spend all year on them if possible, its the rest of life I don't like with cancer and a sectioned child.

I prefer hotels, not a self catering fan, too much work. I also prefer going abroad and discovering new places that are very different to here like the rainforest in Costa Rica, or penguins on the beach in South Africa or the wildlife in Australia. When we go to the UK it feels too similar to home though we did love Isles of Scilly and lovely boat trips in Devon and puffins in Pembrokeshire. Beds I much prefer soft and am normally fine. I love flying, not sure if would like a cruise, I tend to prefer our longhaul trips as more different to home and better wildlife though we saw brown bears in the wild in Finland which was a lovely holiday.

I am clinically vulnerable having recently finished chemo and radio but was fine, just spent 8 nights in Maldives. I was careful about which seats booked on plane but as its warmer and things are outside it was pretty low risk. I am not one for beaches but love swimming, wildlife and watersports. We booked the set of 2 seats at the back of the plane there is an extra seat out there and if you are back row its pretty minimal risk of covid.

In the nicest possible way, I think you’re quite fussy and conservative, or at least far more invested in pillows, mattresses etc than in seeing new places (which is obviously fair enough — your preferences are your preferences). I’m 50, and I love going away, whether it’s a spartan cottage as a walking base, staying in a friends’ place in Paris or Berlin, a NY hotel or a house in Italy. I don’t sleep well or easily either (and like you I’m a hard mattress fanatic) and being vegetarian is still difficult in some places, but I don’t think there’s been anywhere where, despite problems, hasn’t felt ultimately worth it for the art or views, or music or walks or architecture, or people — our holiday this summer was fairly ill-starred as things go (last-minute cancellation of original villa, last-minute second choice expensive and not great, appalling rain throughout, further away than we wanted from where we wanted to be, rental car sat nab not working, other stresses with the friends we were holidaying with, trees down in a storm blocking road for the final two days, barely making flight), but it meant we explored a place we would otherwise have overlooked and got unexpectedly friendly with local people when we all got trapped in a village café in a flood for hours.

But you shouldn’t be forcing yourself to go on holiday if you fundamentally don’t enjoy it. There are people for whom their own bed is more important than seeing different places, and they should feel free to embrace that.

I'm 52, and we usually holiday in the UK so we can take our dogs with us. Our last holiday was in March to Cornwall and I couldn't wait to get home. We paid £1800 for a week in a "luxury" tree house style property but the novelty of climbing nearly 100 steps every time we went out soon wore off... nothing was right, from the water pressure to the cheap beds/sofas. It was a really stunning house but completely let down by the Ikea tat inside it. My review wasn't published, and any attempts to get money back as the hot tub wasn't working fell on deaf ears. It may have been Cornish but it was no "Gem" and certainly wasn't like the glossy photos that were clearly taken about 10 years ago. I was more tired when we got back than we left.