Lottery win (not a bad amount).

[winningballs]

Name changed for this.

I have been thinking about asking this and I have spoken to f&f about it and the opinions vary.

Last Wednesday I got an urge to do the lottery, I haven't done it in ages because I just can't afford it, but I got a lucky dip and lucky it was, I got 5 matching balls plus the bonus. I won't say how much I won but it's a fair amount, enough for me to not worry about bills for the foreseeable and enough to give people 10k each.

Here's my question.

I have a list of whom I would share my winnings with stored on my phone, it's been on there for years and my ex is on there. We have been split for a year or so but I always said I would give him something if I won. I don't hate him and I really liked his children, so should I just transfer some into his account? This is not a plan to get him back as I am happily with someone else now and he has no problem with my list as he is well taken care of too.

Should I - or should I not bother?

On the other end of the scale on life changing

for the “squeezed middle”, on average £31k salary a year living in low priced property market… again life changing

Congratulations OP, made up for you.
Im interested In your motivation for giving your ex £10k. Do you want him back? Or is it a "look at me now, loser" gesture?
Be aware that how he interprets your action might have future implications for you.

You don't sound like someone who is not used to dealing with large amounts of money (neither am I) for that reason I'd be seeking professional advice and guidance. It's true that most lotto winners go bankrupt, you have a chance to set yourself up for life, don't blow it.

I just can’t get my head around getting yourself in a twist about a meaningless “list on my phone”, which includes your ex - when you have won £1million 48 hours ago. Weird!

assuming you plan to pay off mortgage/car loans/other debts that are interest-charged; I'd not consider it a £1m win, I'd consider it a 'whats left at the end' win - whihc may adjust your approach to what to do with it.

In our case that'd probably be more a £500k win and really with kids approaching university we'd do nothing dramatic with it at least until those are safely through the other side and settled in some way

I wouldn’t tell a soul. Would pay off all fees upfront at childrens schools.

pay off mortgage but no way move as love love love my home.

bit to charity. Bit in savings, new car and then…. A mahoosive holiday

A million quid doesn't go far these days. AT ALL. I wouldn't be giving any away anytime soon. Invest invest invest. Turn that million into an actual future for yourself, don't piss it up the wall. You'll never have this opportunity again

I thought I read they had advisors for big wins.

Honestly I wouldn't do much at all for a while -till it' sunk in.

Then Id look at what I needed - buy house/pay of mortgage - puts some aside for future maintenance issues - make sure long term my needs were met and maybe think about a holiday for celebration or new kitchen or something you want but don't need but could enjoy.

Then I'd have a long think and I would keep things quiet as people do come out the woodwork and do get entitled.

Then I suggest thinking - long and hard about how you can best help nearest and dearest - you don't have to do anything immediately at all and talk it through with processionals. If you give ex money now - will it be blown on high living and would you care if it was - would it be better to help his kids when they hit higher education/house deposit age or now? I'd suggest lot of thinking and taking advice and less reacting to what you think you should do.

I would, I think that’s a lovely thing to do. Be clear about your boundaries though and perhaps set them out (or say you’ve spent / given it all away)

Don't give it away or tell anyone. Invest it and live off the proceeds.

As others have said a million £ is a big lump sum but it won't last forever unless you're careful. I know a couple of millionaires and they are all very sensible with money, average cars, weekly shop at Aldi or Tesco etc. They might live in bigger houses but those houses have higher utility bills, expensive council tax etc.

I wouldn't give anyone else any money immediately. Rather than giving out money I'd maybe help immediate family if they needed new home appliances etc. You must think about your own and your children's future first.

I know your ex. Send me the money and I'll handle him cash.

*hand

Congratulations btw.

@Oddieconvert completely agree.

OP - Please don't do or say anything until you've had some financial advice.
You are probably in shock - I know I would be!

Read the post from a PP who won £500k - she's been through it and has some good advice.

I wouldn’t do anything for a while.
I’d let it sit in your account and mull it over.
Whilst it’s a fair amount, it will soon be gone without caution.

if you’ve had the list for years, go back over it multiple times and really think about whether you really want to give it away.

Rather than money, you can always just spend more on nice gifts for people.
even if you don’t have kids at the moment, if a family is something you might have in the future, then that amount would make a lovely life for them, as opposed to other people you’re not longer in contact with.

Sounds slightly harsh perhaps but a million really isn’t that much long term anymore. Put yourself before anyone else - other people WOULD.

This is possibly the weirdest thread I have ever read on MN. Why on earth woukd anyone give money randomly to an ex? Even if you are on friendly terms?!

Winning £1million is a life changing amount. It isn't life changing enough that you will be living like a premier league footballer for the rest of your life, but it will change the life of the vast majority.

Used sensibly it could make life easier for the rest of the OPs life, that is a change to life. If she chucks tens of thousands around as gifts it won't though.

It is enough to but a family home with change in most areas. It is disingenuous to suggest that having no rent/mortgage cost would not change life for the majority.

Exactly, pay off your own house and buy a small house (outside of London) or flat (in London) for each of the kids to set them up for life, rent them out and invest the money for them while they're young, and it's all accounted for!

Apparently it’s only half a million.

Apparently it’s half a million not a million.

I received £500k in a court settlement twenty years ago. I gave gifts to many people. Sad to say I still get asked for handouts although it is long gone!
You sound kind and decent, be careful.

Congratulations

I read in Martin Lewises website that £1,000,000 got two years will give you at least £100 a day after tax fixed for two years.

if it was me, I’d say nothing and do that, I would also speak to the professionals at Camelot who there to “guide and advise”.

I’ve not read the answers of other people to your question, there will only be two answers, and ultimately it’s your decision.

Enjoy the £100 a day for a couple of years, get a little book/diary and write down all your thoughts about the money, and worry about who gets what in two years time.

That is my opinion, it’s your win, again, Congratulations, and let’s us know in your psydenam what you did.

Good Luck and thoroughly enjoy the rest of your life, get it right, the money will be there for the rest of your life, get it wrong, it will be gone in a couple of years.

Congratulations

No way would I give £10k to an ex! Fuck that.

However:

£600k plus equity in current house for nice detached 4 bed house with non-overlooked garden
£100k on car, upgrades to existing house before selling, paying off credit card etc (could easily spend upwards of £70k on this house to get it to a decent state - needs new kitchen, skimming every wall, redecorating after that, new flooring in every room, new windows, new downstairs loo, realistically redo bathroom, replace falling down conservatory with modern one or possible extension).

£10k per parent and sibling = £80k.

Round it up a bit - that's £800k right there and I haven't considered friends at all or wider family, or holidays/pensions/savings for my kids etc. Pretty sure I couldn't afford to drop my hours more than maybe one day at work, certainly couldn't retire. I'd have a lot more disposable cash every month with no mortgage payments or car payments, but I wouldn't be rolling in it.

I would give him nothing and keep quiet about your win.

Ideally, I'd suggest don't tell people about your winnings

But if that's difficult, then I'd suggest you tell a white lie and tell people you won less than you did eg if they think you won £20,000, friends will be happy for you and delighted if you just take them out for a meal to celebrate

If you do wish to share more widely, I think lottery winners are encouraged to give someone a modest amount and see what they do with it. You can top it up later if you wish

The alternative to gifts for those not in immediate desperate need is to make bequests in your will.
£10k would be a wonderful gift but not life changing — boost a house deposit, buy a used car, pay for an expensive holiday. In other words it just means much frittering by many people rather than something positive for the future. Sit on it awhile and decide how you can help f&f with the interest.